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  #1   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 13:01
kyrasdad's Avatar
kyrasdad kyrasdad is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 3,060
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 338/253/210 Male 5'11"
Progress: 66%
Location: Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
Default If you're new...

Some of us have been around this place for years. Every January, we see the an influx of people who make a post, start a journal, post menu's, join discussions -- and then drop out of sight.

I'm here to tell you that if you let it, this place can be of enormous help on your journey. If you use its resources and community, it will be more helpful to you than you could ever imagine. I think this is partly because obese people like me tend to want community. There are things we need to say that we can't say much of anywhere else. There are discussions we need to have that a person half our size has no way to empathize with. We like to talk about these issues with people who are facing them, not with people who cannot fathom why we just don't "eat less, move more."

You can vent here, especially in TDC, to people who have walked a mile in your shoes. You don't have to explain to them the fear of humiliation when you want to sit in a folding chair, but are afraid to. When I began, I found it to be one of the most cathartic things I have ever done. For me, these were discussions that I couldn't or wouldn't have in person.

That's not to say this ought to be a "woe is me" whine center. It is also a way to help make yourself accountable. Talk about what you have done and why. I loathe to change my weight up, when I backslide, but I do it. I somehow feel accountable to the others here when I fail. That is a good thing. This place is not good just for cathartic discussion and accountability, it's good for victory celebrations and congratulations.

I recommend a journal. I don't update mine daily anymore, but for the first year or so I was here, that was my crutch and my source of strength. It helped me hash out an understanding of my state of thought when I was much fatter, and how I got to be that way. That is self-discovery worth doing.

It is also extremely good place for information. Read the Media & Discussions area. There are some extremely sharp people who can break down the latest study to help you understand why foods or diet react certain ways. If you want to know more about the metabolic reason you got fat (and you should) then that is invaluable. I'm not scientific, but I can follow it the way some of our fellow members here explain it.

As a guy, I never was much interested in cooking. I didn't know beyond some very basics how to cook anything that I couldn't grill. If you think about it, investing the time to learn to cook can also make this thing work for you. Food is a vital piece of life and food really needs to occupy part of your time and creativity if you really plan to succeed.

Finally, my biggest piece of advice is that you should find a guiding principle to what you are doing and why. My first was that I was doing this so I could be a better father. But that wasn't true. It was something I needed to do for me, so I could live longer, be healthier, and enjoy life better. Those things let me be a better father. But this belongs to me, not my girl. It wasn't fair to project that on her. If you project it onto someone else, or some extrenal thing, I think you will fail. It has to be for you.

My guiding principle is that life as a fat person is the hardest thing I've ever done. I didn't realize how hard it was until I lost a lot of weight. It is much harder than sticking to any way of eating. So that has been my guideline, when I want to stray. I know how hard it is sometimes to pass up certain foods. But I also know how hellishly hard life was at 350 pounds.

This thing is hard. You have to be willing to learn about nutrition, about food, about yourself, about cooking, about some self-denial.

But it ain't nothing compared to being fat.

Good luck in your efforts. Most of you, like most dieters, will not be able to make the jump. Most diets, even low carb ones, fail. That's just reality. I don't say that from arrogance, being 60 pounds overweight myself. The jury is still out on me. But at least it hasn't come back with a conviction yet, and that's all I can ask.

Now, get yourself in the game.
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  #2   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 13:24
penelope's Avatar
penelope penelope is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 10,098
Plan: Controlled carbs
Stats: 218/195/150 Female 62"
Progress: 34%
Location: Alberta

I could not have said it better and I am glad you wrote this.

I had to stop thinking of quick weight loss and concentrate on daily living, this forum helps but most of all the journals help. I did not want to write but I wanted to make sure your post stay visible on the board.

At 52 I was told that I had lost a lots of weight and how happy I must be but you know, I was still stuck on what I still have to drop.

What brought it home to me is that I would have a hard time picking up my lost pounds and carrying them around.

Now I know I did well.

I am hanging around this place and it keeps me focus, which, is an enormous help because I still have a way to go.
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  #3   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 13:34
joylorene's Avatar
joylorene joylorene is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 2,715
Plan: atkins/hcg
Stats: 228/162/135 Female 65
Progress: 71%
Location: North Dakota

kyrasdad - THANK YOU!! You should post this in the newbie section also! It was very helpful to me.
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  #4   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 13:55
Charran's Avatar
Charran Charran is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 9,446
Plan: my own
Stats: 253/176.0/153 Female 5 feet 7 inches
Progress: 77%

Even though I am not new to this forum, I find the advice there excellent and from time to time, need to be reminded of it myself. I hope there are many new people out there who take those words to heart.
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  #5   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 14:57
snburch's Avatar
snburch snburch is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 703
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 260/208.8/130 Female 5 FT 5 IN
Progress: 39%
Location: North Texas

Thanks for taking the time to write that. It's inspiring.
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  #6   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 15:24
josiekat's Avatar
josiekat josiekat is offline
Recovering Yo-Yo
Posts: 2,792
Plan: What's best for me
Stats: 291.6/147/164 Female 5'8"
BF:A work in progress
Progress: 113%
Location: Vancouver BC

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  #7   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 15:57
Judynyc's Avatar
Judynyc Judynyc is offline
Attitude is a Choice
Posts: 30,111
Plan: No sugar, flour, wheat
Stats: 228.4/209.0/170 Female 5'6"
Progress: 33%
Location: NYC

Excellent post Scott!
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  #8   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 16:00
loverain's Avatar
loverain loverain is offline
Registered Member
Posts: 41
Plan: Atkins
Stats: 298/286/120 Female 5'3.5"
Progress: 7%

Thanks for the advice and hi!
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  #9   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 17:21
joesfolks's Avatar
joesfolks joesfolks is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 3,231
Plan: general leaning toward Sb
Stats: 336/196/150 Female 5'4"
Progress: 75%
Location: Grand Rapids, Mi

If you think his post is inspirational you should click on his gallery. Man, you are looking great!
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  #10   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 18:38
bob2112's Avatar
bob2112 bob2112 is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 12,749
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 499.0/166.0/199.0 Male 75 inches
Progress: 111%
Location: Seabrook, TX.

Excellent Post!! Thanks for sharing.
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  #11   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 19:25
tjf9's Avatar
tjf9 tjf9 is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 618
Plan: Weight Loss Study
Stats: 203/134.2/130 Female 63 in
Progress: 94%
Location: Pacific NW

The whole post was wonderful, but I loved this sentiment especially:

My guiding principle is that life as a fat person is the hardest thing I've ever done. I didn't realize how hard it was until I lost a lot of weight. It is much harder than sticking to any way of eating.

Very inspirational!
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  #12   ^
Old Fri, Jan-05-07, 20:28
SkeeterX's Avatar
SkeeterX SkeeterX is offline
No Cheats Ever!
Posts: 2,336
Plan: LCHF
Stats: 291/163/155 Female 67 inches
Progress: 94%
Location: NE WI

I've been here a year now.. and still consider myself a newb, compared to some of the veterans I have come to find here. I lurk in their journals, reading some entirely. I don't post much, but what Kyrasdad posted above is 100% true. I do better when I read and spend time here. It keeps me focused.

Thanks for writing this!
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  #13   ^
Old Sat, Jan-06-07, 06:12
bkloots's Avatar
bkloots bkloots is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 10,154
Plan: LC--Atkins
Stats: 195/158/150 Female 62in
Progress: 82%
Location: Kansas City, MO

Hi, Scott. I arrived at your post via somebody else's journal reference, and I'm glad I got a chance to read it. Really...I'm touched.

You are a true inspiration in every way. Thanks for caring enough to write so eloquently about the journey of a lifetime.
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  #14   ^
Old Sat, Jan-06-07, 09:09
Kristine's Avatar
Kristine Kristine is offline
Forum Moderator
Posts: 25,759
Plan: Primal/P:E
Stats: 171/145/145 Female 5'7"
Progress: 100%
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada

*Pokes head into the TDC*

What they said. I'm sure I've tried a hundred times (or more) to explain the difference between another crash diet and permanant change, and you've explained it better than I ever have. Bravo!
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  #15   ^
Old Sat, Jan-06-07, 09:55
liddie01's Avatar
liddie01 liddie01 is offline
Butter is Better!
Posts: 5,894
Plan: Atkins OWL
Stats: 234/220.4/160 Female 5"8.5"
BF:its back again!
Progress: 18%
Location: Mount Carmel, Pa.

Thank you for that post Scott.
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