Hi yall!

Oh boy can I relate to this thread! I had a binge on Monday, although it technically started Saturday night, with treats I had bought my daughter. I try not to keep Junk in the house. I bought Ice Cream, Cinamon buns, cookies and cookie ice cream sandwiches. She went with me shopping - I should know better. By Monday I had been through all of them and needed salt. I went to the store and bought a small bag of chips, pretzels and popcorn. Had another binge day. I felt awful and am back on the wagon today. If I had not had the stuff in the house, I never would have cheated in the first place. There was no emotion involved. The junk was just calling my name and it was deafening.

In many ways I feel like an alcoholic. I love the food and the high - yet feel awful from the carbs afterward. I have learned not to drink, because of how it makes me feel. Now I just need to learn not to eat junk, because of how it makes me feel. I feel terrific when I am free of the carb hold on me.

I have been regularly low carb for a year now and occasionally for a few years.

Sun Country......

I am exactly the same way. I am very anal about my diet...and have tremdous self control...even in the face of others eating junk...but then there are those times...(usually around the time of the month..which for me is coming up next week). If I can prepare myself for the feelings Of wanting to binge...then maybe I can avoid it.

Now that I'm on OWL I can have a little no sugar treat....like the low carb ice cream..only I am so afraid that I won't stop myself at 1 serving! Today, I had 6 macadamia nuts...then couldn't stop...till I ate 12-14 of them...which is more than I wanted to eat...but still not catastrophic.

I hate my mind sometimes and how I let myself lose self control.

JEM! Just wanted to say that the book you read sounds like what I need to read!! Thanks for tellingme about it...think I'll check to see if it is available used somewhere!

I just need something to tell myself when I feel myself starting to want to binge....you know it is like a hypnotic trance, when it starts until when it ends.

I feel right at home with you guys. I recently accepted the fact that I have an eating disorder. I'm a compulsive eater and luckly for me I went about solving my problems by indulging in literature on the subject of compulsive eating.

I recently borrowed some books on the subject and they have helped me tremendously. I suggest them to all. Their titles are, "From the First Bite" by Kay Sheppard, "Food Addiciton" by Kay Sheppard. These two books are wonders for those like us who are binge eaters. I highly recommend these books.

I've come to realize reading these books that our eating disorder is like that of any other addictive disease and the best method of attack is abstinence. What a let down, I thought we could conquer it and have an occational bite but thats not the case. It's like an alcoholic saying,"I can have one drink, it won't hurt." You already knows what comes after. That driver might take someone's life all the while we end our's very slowly.

Thanks for the support and advice, I hope I've helped, let's continue to help each other.

Well, last night I went off-plan for the first time in 65 days. I went out and ate Mexican food. I am still worried alittle about this triggering the desire to binge but so far not.

The meal I ate was normal, even had leftovers, but still, I ate it out of stress and it was too many calories and too many carbs and I would have prefered not to have done that. Obviously.

I'm mostly worried that now that I've eaten off-plan I will throw all caution to the wind and start binging and sneak eating again. I haven't had the urge to do so yet today (or last night), but I need to make through the rest of this week and the weekend to know whether or not the urge will come and if it does, whether I can beat it.

I'm disappointed in myself for eating out of stress. I really, really wanted to go a full 168 days (until my birthday) before eating anything off-plan or out of the oridinary. I'm trying not to feel like I've failed myself.

thanks for the suggestions on other books... i will check the library for em

cheesy- dont feel bad about 'cheating'. if anything, you should feel relieved that you got through it and you came out ok. you didnt go crazy. i think that restricting yourself to never cheat is really setting yourself up for a binge. you have to eat things you crave from time to time... just learn to do it in moderation and control yourself. im sure you'll be fine... as long as you dont allow your fears to overcome you. you have tremendous self control and are a smart girl, you'll do fine. life is not over. nothing is different today than it was a week ago... unless you allow it to be- and i dont think you will. u haven't failed, you've liberated yourself, and you should take from that experience that its ok to 'cheat' as long as you remain in control ((hugs))

mil- it took me so long to admit i had an 'eating disorder'. with me, i dont think its the food thats my problem, its my emotions. i dont blame the food or think i can never eat a cookie again or it would be all over... because to me, that would just be avoiding the emotions, like avoiding the cookie. i think alot of alcoholics do that too... they blame the alcohol rather than blame the emotions or the reaction to emotions. i think with food, the more u avoid it, the more stress and tension you cause yourself, and u set yourself up to binge. but thats just my opinion of my particular case... obviously, every1 is different.

food WILL sometimes trigger a binge *if* i let it, tho. like zipetys experience with the macadamia nuts. but if that was me, i was probably eating them out of boredum to begin with, or for oral satisfaction rather than because i was really hungry. and thats something else i need to work on.

i can relate to you so much sun... when i cheat, its usually planned. i allow myself to do it, know the consequences, yet do it anyways... like, i usually cheat on cheesecake. it tastes SO good, its not the worst thing for you, it can be made LC, BUT im lactose intolerant, so, it makes me sick. but i eat it anyways. stupid stupid stupid. and everytime i say im not going to do that again, but i always do.

ack- i know i rambled alot here... i hope i make sense

*steps forwards & admits that I have a problem*

Hi everyone;

Just to add confusion to this thread, I thought I would through in another "Zip".

I binge when I am stressed (which seems to be all the time now), lonely, sad, bored, sometimes even happy just to "celebrate". I am an equal opportunity binger; it is not a particular food or ingredient in a food that sets me off. I do not crave a particular flavour or genre of food.

I think I am also getting afraid of succeeding at weight loss!! I am afraid of being on a "diet" and monitoring everything I eat now b/c it puts the emphasis on the food again (albeit in a "good" light).

I'm not sure I even taste the food now or enjoy it. Most people that meet me say that I'm funny or pleasant (was they get past the initial shyness), but I feel black and empty inside - completely lost.

I actually used to belong to this forum under another name but kind of got embarassed that I may seem to be whinging and negative all the time that I cancelled my account. I missed certain friends of mine though and am back, but tend to do far more reading & absorbing than I do with generating content.

I have tried Overeaters Anonymous, but saw one of the mentors absolutely gorging herself while she walked down the street (people were turning their heads to look!). I did not make my presence known so as to preserve her privacy. But at the following meeting, she just gushed about how well she was doing and how wonderful everything was. I do not want to cast judgements on her, but I wasn't feeling settled in OA & what I perceived as a lack of honesty & reality really cut the bottom out of that program for me.

I have tried NLP (neurolinguistic programming). That worked for about 2 weeks-ish. Despite trying the mental exercises over & over, I cannot maintain a non-binge state or break my thought patterns about food.

I do not know when I first started this eating behaviour. I feel like my fatness is a symptom and just "treating" that is not going to get to the underlying issue. However, I do not want to delve into some weird and wonderful shrink profile of myself; I would just like to get on with living, but continually imprison myself physically in my own flesh.

I am glad this thread was started. I think as far as WOE's go, low carb feels better for me. I'm not fooling myself though - I know there are other things I need to be aware of outside of "diets" in order for me to beat this.


Z.

I am so glad this thread was started. As I read through the posts I saw so much of myself. I binge - but not to feeling sick. I find that I do it by myself. When I'm bored, depressed, procrastinating on something else I SHOULD be doing! I can go weeks without 'binging'. It usually is during the day. As long as I can remember I have made it a habit to not eat three hours prior to bed unless we have been out or it is unusual circumstances - so the night time snacks don't hit me there. I'm a 'choc chip cookie' finantic. That is my complete weakness. Two does it for me - but it is when I do two sets of two in an hour, two hours, etc... it is ridculous. I get the 'munchies' and try nuts, because they are filling, but I don't eat salt, so I try to limit that too. I emotionally eat more than anything. Reg baked potatoes are another one of my weaknesses - makes me full, only need one - but still, the carbs!!!! Sheesh. Anyway, like I said, I'm glad this was started, and feel I have a place to come to knowing I"m not alone in this mad mad world.

/christine

Yeah, me too. Sometimes I just think I have a weak character.

Christine -- you're definitely not alone.

i feel your pain. when i first started this woe, i was (and admittedly still am) obsessed. i fuss over the amount of sugar in tums when im sick for christ sake. i plan all day today for what my menu will be like tomorrow. there really is no such thing as grab & go with LCing, so, you're constantly planning, preparing, eating, cleaning up, evaluating, planning, preparing, eating... u get the idea. im constantly thinking about food which is what i don't want to do. but i figure, its would be easier to start 'dieting' first and learn how to eat properly and then when it becomes second nature, work on relaxing a bit. and its working. now that i'm months in and feel like i have a pretty goos grasp on LCing, i've started reading books about binging, food obsessions, etc. and its really starting to work out.

Quote:

Originally Posted by zipity I do not know when I first started this eating behaviour. I feel like my fatness is a symptom and just "treating" that is not going to get to the underlying issue.

i remember exactly when i first started. right after my parents got divorced when i was about 14. man, did i feed my pain on that one. right about the same time i started gaining weight. how ironic- NOT. i totally agree that dieting is not going to solve the problem long-term and that if we dont deal with the emotional issues we have, that we will be the statistic that gains everything back & then some.

i just ordered those 2 books by kay sheppard & a 3rd by debbie danowski called "why cant i stop eating". cant wait to get em thanks for suggesting em. ill let ya know how i like em

Hi everyone! Welcome to the newbies I can honestly say I don't feel alone anymore. And I know where to go for support or just to see I am not alone. I have been pretty good, but have come close. Today is day 4 so I am keeping my mind focused and staying in touch. You all take care!

Mil.....I think you may be right about the abstinence....that means the south beach diet is out.....because of the reward meal...I really doubt that I could control myself to eat just one sliver of chocolate cake. Today I made my own faux atkins bake mix and compared it to the regular atkins bake mix by making pancakes from it...well out of 5 pancakes..I managed to leave one! ugh! But! I must say that the atkins bake mix recipe on this site is nearly identical to the real stuff!!! if you shop right you can make it for less too!

I'm doing a lot better for now, though I have had a few times where I've overindulged on LC things. Almost a binge (at least eating to the point of discomfort). I still have non-craving urges to pig out, especially on chips and especially if I'm bored. Still going to be interesting to see how I hold out later. I think right now it's not as much of an issue because things are still pretty restricted for me and I have that tight "control" over what I'm eating.

Debbie

I plan on keeping myself busy this weekend. It is going to rain, so I can't get outside and work in the yard, so I will finish my blanket I was making. And maybe start a new one. And do some work on my upcoming daycare, so much to do. Now if I can keep motivated so I don't slip!