Wed, Feb-15-12, 12:21
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Absurdtive
Posts: 11,313
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Plan: Atkins
Stats: 272.5/174.4/165
BF:44?/32.6/20
Progress: 91%
Location: SF Bay Area
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mykelogan
One of the biggest things I struggle with as I lose weight is not knowing who I will be when I do reach my goals? Except for a two year period at the end of High School (and I am 38 now) I have never been a "normal weight." More so, I feel like much of my personality is built around being the "funny fat guy" or the "fat friend." As you can see from my numbers, I haven't just been the chubby friend but the massively fat guy, at times bordering on shut in due to my weight. That is definitely not a happy place to be personally and even now, at a "functioning fat" level, I still worry about what will happen. It is this fear of not knowing who I will "become" that has often sabotaged me in the past as I have gotten close to my goals. I panic and retreat back into my old ways because they are comfortable and they are what I know.
Has anyone else dealt with these fears? I am just wondering how people have tried to prepare themselves for what comes next.
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You can become whoever YOU want to be. Don't let other people decide that for you. Ever. I know that's easier said than done, but it's a very powerful notion that you are the master of your own fate. I was overweight or obese from about age 11 or 12 until a couple years ago. I feel like I'm the same person though, just a smaller, more confident version of myself. I realize that you are coming from a different, more limited place perhaps than I was, but I think that there is still some kernel of truth to this for you as well. You can still be funny and a great friend--my husband was the "funny fat guy"....and he's still a funny guy, just 90 pounds lighter
I definitely agree that working on body image and other emotional issues that tie into obesity are extremely important. Come visit us in the TDC--we have some great threads there on the very issues that you are discussing. There are many links in the Best of TDC sticky thread at the top of that sub-forum.
--Melissa
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