Sun, Jun-27-10, 13:44
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Senior Member
Posts: 2,981
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Plan: Atkins
Stats: 204/150/150
BF:
Progress: 100%
Location: Winnipeg, Canada
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Hi There!
I am by no means an expert but I will contribute my two-cents worth.......
Confidence and self esteem have many, many facets which can increase and decrease in a flash depending on what life throws us. The two areas that come to mind are feeling inferior to others (comparing ourselves to others) and the need or feeling for constant perfection.
I found an excellent article addressing these areas. Below is an excerpt I would like to share with you:
- Believing that you are inferior in some way to other people
Feelings of inferiority may start when you think you aren't as good as another person in one area of life or personality (a lack of charm, good looks, education, intelligence, social ability and so on) and this then becomes a more general sense of not being good enough and diminishes your confidence. But although the majority of people think their self-doubt, their innermost secrets and desires, their emotional experiences and behavior, are unique to them, in reality we are all basically the same. Of course, we all have different personal attributes and success in life, but for any particular personal ability or attribute, we are all inferior to some people and superior to others. Social status, education, upbringing and so on do not indicate a person's innate worth - even if society tends to adopt that attitude. There are many other more human qualities that matter more in interpersonal relationships: commitment, loyalty, honesty, affection, respect, to name just a few. And remember that even the people you envy and admire do not lead perfectly harmonious lives. There are likely to be situations in which they do not feel confident, just as there are for you.
The real cure for feelings of inferiority is to know that you are equal, and to change the beliefs which stand between you and happiness.
- Believing that you must do everything as near perfectly as possible
The curse of perfectionism prevents you obtaining satisfaction or fulfillment from what you do; it causes you constantly to examine and recheck your actions, it makes you feel a failure if you achieve less than the impossible standard of perfection. To learn to be just "good enough" is a major boost to self-confidence.
Remember that we are all wonderful creatures with different attributes, strengths and weaknesses but we all contribute to the greater good!
Oh yeah, and remember to SMILE, its your greatest asset!!!
Cheers,
~ Chris ~
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