I can tell you the excate date 12-13-07 When I went over the edge. Christmas party. I was struggling monthes before, but that was the straw that broke this womens back LOL. I am total out of control with the food, It is controling me right now, and I hate it. You would think after living with this it would sink into my (currently muddled brain) that Carbs are going to be the death of me or a big nervous brakedown LOL. I rate 100% on the addicts test. I have tried to get back into atkins, but there is noway I can do that anymore, for any lenght of time. When I do cad I follow the first book as I did great on it. (I do have both books) I just find cad easyer for me in the groceys on hand department, as I never know what I have with 2 teenagers in the house.
Weight is no longer an issue, even tho I may be about 10 pounds heavyer, but I gained alot of musal. I just cant take eating the huge amounts of food and still feel like I'm starving and eating myself sick. This is a sick way to live. Soooooo yesterday pulled out my cader books that make so much sense and do explane that this is like my body is sick at the moment, and they give me the way back. Clicking heels 3 times. Iwant to come home
I work midnights now so 7:30 in the morning is my dinner. But I have gotten use to saving the dinner I cook the night before for the family and having it when I get off. I have been off for 2 days and I go back tonight, so this morning I had a cm then I will have 2 more today, To help with the turn around in hours. Then I will have my reward meal in the morning when I get off.
I am truly sorry for this to be sooo long winded, but no one around me uderstands what I am going through. and I really need to talk to anyone who understands. I feel at this moment like dirt. Thanks again to all who read this,
and any encouraging words would be of great help

hi Cheryl-
welcome back! You can do it- your planning is great. The RM from the night before is great- and your CMs on your days off sound great too. There are people on CAD or CALP who have their RM at breakfast as a way to control the amount of carbs. Yours sounds great to me.
Please give yourself credit that you are back OP- stop beating yourself up about the xmas events.
Glad you are here-
post a lot! I love long posts.
E

Hi Cheryl! I agree with Eno - welcome back and your plan looks great! You have to do what works for you! I love long posts, too. I have a tendency to yap a lot so I'm glad when others have long posts! I'm not in here as much as I'd like to be because I've been really busy lately but hope to change that eventually!

Hi Cheryl

If I reached out, like you're doing, when I first got off plan, I wouldn't be 30 pounds heavier today. I too found Atkins too painful, though its a great WOE and I believe it really works for many people. But CAD is wonderful and like you, I think it fits better into family life. Your reasons for going off was exactly the same as mine. If there's a pattern, then maybe it'll be easier to find ways to make good choice for the future! Sounds like you're going great guns and getting back on track just in time. S.

Thank you all so much. Cravings are gone and I feel like a normal person. My Rm is not balanenced, but right now getting use to eatting 3 times a day and getting it together is first priorady (learning to spell is second LOL) I still cant belive how eatting all that crap can make one feel so desperate. Not a good feeling at all. Will check back in on my days off in a few days. Working midnights, puts a twist on the plan for me, making sure I dont have 2 Rm's in 24 hours, when I change over to daytime to enjoy my 2 days off.