Wow Finola, you sound exactly like me! Isn't it weird how when you're purposefully restricting you're just fine with it, but when you feel like you "have to" go on a diet, it makes you feel completely deprived & grumpy & miserable? I've never been able to figure that one out...

(Oh, and I'm 39, so I'm no spring chicken myself)...

Yeah. For me it is almost like a switch in my brain.

If it is flipped up I am an eater and "diets" are torture. If it is flipped down I am in the ED zone and "dieting" is easy.

Working hard to find a happy medium.

Compulsive overeater, binger, emotional eater, food addict -- whatever you call it, I'm it.



Something that I heard someone say once has stuck with me ever since -- that love is an action. I called my journal my "Labor of Love", so every time I looked at that corny title, I would be reminded that that's what this is about: labor -- action -- love.

I don't think your thoughts and fears are stupid. I have tendancies to try to restrict food. I make it a game, try to find ways to get fewer and fewer calories in a day. The game can only be played for so long, and shure enough the hunger gets ya, and BINGE!

Your not alone, glad you are here!

Jacki

Hi,
I'm new to this site, and part of the reason I joined is because I've fought with, and am still fighting with bulemia. I want to loose weight, but I want to do it the right way. I want to be healthy. I'm doing the atkins diet, but I wondered if anyone had any tips on the best way to exercise or when to eat.

Thank You A Lot.

Welcome dq,
Congrats on taking the all important step of changing your mindset. It only gets better from here.

I also, started low carbing as a way of getting over my fear of foods. However, the biggest boon this WOE has given me personally is that I don't stress about food as much, I am more functional socially and I can keep my body in the shape I want without having to kill myself.

- I would suggest you do the diet 'by the book'.
- eat when you want to. its really that simple
- As for exercise, I would suggest a training with a partner so that they can keep your bulimic/over-exercise tendency in check.
- If you feel you cannot afford a trainer or get a partner, I can point you toward some female specific training websites.

THE KEY IS TO STICK TO YOUR PLAN OF GETTING BETTER!!

wow i debated for a hot minute wether i was going to respond to this thread or not.... considering all the flack i got with my b4 and after pix.....

an ED is nothing to be ashamed of.

i started out at a very young age (5yrs old) as a c.o.e
then in high school i went the complete opposite and battled anorexic tendencies and compulsive over exercising for yrs.
but it was not something that was life threatening.
it would come and go in spurts.
after i was assaulted in '98 i became a c.o.e again eating myself from 145lbs to 285lbs. i started atkins in '01/'02 and took control back of my life. my mom helped me stay focused and i was determined to not max out at 300lbs.
in march - july of '03 i started to suffer a lot of medical problems. and i had become paralyzed (i now walk but i use a crutch sometimes) i was also give a diagnosis of lupus, fibro, transverse mylitis (degenerative spinal condition), sjogrens. after being dealt that hand and a year later losing a baby with my then bf at the time. i spiraled back had into the anorexia....

this time harder to look back and maintain a semi helathy mindset.
i plunged headfirst and spiral out of control.
i went into treatment in '05
but focusing only on weight restoration and not mental health i flew blindly once out of treatment.
i went from 95lbs - 145lbs
and there is when it all went to shit.....
i am now diagnosed with bulimarexia (anorexic / purging type)
i still maintain an unhealthy relationship with food.
i am doing better from last year.
i am gotten as low as 72lbs but i am steadily maintaining between 88-96 now..... which to some is not good enough and is still dangerous.... yadda yadda yadda.... i know this.... i have an eating disorder im not stupid.
dealing with an addiction to food be it over eating or lack there of eating it is a terribly hard addiction.
food is the sustenance of life.
i cant walk away from food, avoid food shopping, family holidays and gatherings. food will be a constant battle.
all i can do is take it one day ...... no.... one meal at a time

i appologize if i seem a little defensive but after feeling like i have been slightly attacked on here i have been gone for the past year'ish. but i lurk on and off.
its nice to see that we are not alone

-=hugs=-

Why not just put it out there ~ I pretty much could be diagnosed as "Ednos". I have tons of tendancies, of both anorexia, coe, and bulimia, though I just can't purge ( in the way of vomitting). Your not alone out there. There are more of us I am sure then even responded. Eating low carb though, has pretty much kept this under control for me, but now as I continue to lose, I am afraid I won't know when to stop. When it is truly enough. We will see. I have considered therapy, but .. i dont want to admit to anyone that counts LOL.

I battled bulimia my whole life, then I dropped all carbs from my diet, and have never had the urge to binge or purge again. I never thought I would have a life without bulimia.

I just want to say I wish all that are struggling kind thoughts and luck for your recovery. It sounds like a very tough road, but doable. Hang on there!