Yes, it was the weight. And the ways bathing suits used to need constant monitoring and always seemed to have a strap that cut into me somewhere. Of course I felt terribly exposed even in a one piece. (And the vigilant shaving required!)
Bathing suits are so better now, and come in a variety of mix and match styles. I am older but (thanks to low carb) slimmer. And I'm sunbathing and swimming this summer, at our town beach.
Whatever size you might be, I urge you to get over the trauma of wanting to be out there looking like a swimsuit model. The real ones have a whole crew working to make them look like that. And even then, it's airbrushed!
Instead, I met other people in suits, and no one cares what we look like. We're just here to have a good (and healthy) time. No swimsuit models there
I am currently at a weight I have not seen since the onset of puberty
. This is the first time
I am able to "go to the beach" and have a normal developmental experience.
It really is fun. I will not deprive myself!