Hi Allura,

Thank you for replying, those are the words that I so needed to hear. What you had to go through with your ex husband, I feel for you. I was a lot smaller when I met my husband, but he is so good and understanding about it. Thank God that he is because I don't know what I would do if he wasn't there for me. But I've had a lot of "friends" and family that totally see the weight and not me, its just the worst feeling in the world. I think that its starting to sink in that its there pure ignorance. My Aunt keeps on telling me about this woman she knows, she had the Gastric Bybass surgery and has lost 80 lbs since June. You can see it in her eyes....HINT HINT. It just infuriates me, by no means do I plan on getting that surgery.

I do love myself. I know that I have a lot of work to do on myself, mentally and physically. Thank you for listening and just to let everyone know, I'm not always this down in the dumps!