It takes guts to be honest, especially about toxic masculinity. Your story supports my own oft-expressed opinion that we ALL suffer from it.

That's great that you have a salad bar handy. It is my go-to that anything I used to love in a sandwich works even better in a salad (summer) or omelette (winter.) It wasn't until I went low carb that I realized how bread actually interferes with the full flavor of sandwich innards.

You want to scare yourself, look at the bottled dressing labels. The ingredients lately are "water, sugar" and then it doesn't matter!