Hi Emily -

yes the vertigo is really bad - although this time round I don't have it - I think it must be empty nicotine receptors that do that.
Don't feel bad about going back to smoking - I mean obviously it was tragic for you, but it is a fact that a 'smoking' brain takes a long time to go back to functioning like a normal person's brain (with good serotonin and dopamine levels etc). Tobacoo is a natural MAOI inhibitor - a natural antidepressant and experts think this is why people who quit sometimes go back to smoking months after being smoke-free. However although it has AD effects, I think it is depressing for people in the long run (and certainly depressing to be hooked on it and suffer healthwise).

I tried the zyban years ago and felt great on it - even managed to quit smoking, but after a whole week of zero sleep I couldn't continue. I was knitting like crazy the whole time! I think the panic attacks are common as it really ups dopamine a lot.

This chantix is supposed to replace lost dopamine at 60% of smoking levels - and I haven't had any insomnia. But I take magnesium for that anyway. I just wish my shoulder would ease up.

Today has actually been quite tough (in comparison with yesterday). I am not 'craving' a cigarette, but I can definitely feel a physical withdrawal going on. I've felt a bit depressed most of the day and did have a bit of a cry - I would like to start feeling normal soon if possible. It doesn't help that the weather is very crap here right now (cold, cloudy, damp - living in Chile it is Winter here and we have no heating) and my normal day-to-day things to do aren't giving me much 'joy' if that makes any sense. I can't tell if I'm hungry or full either - it is like all the chemicals in my brain are messed up. But that has happened before, so I don't think it's the Chantix.

Tomorrow at 5pm I will have made the 72 hours nicotine free so I am expecting things to get a little worse before then. I'm ok. I can cope - that is the first time I have ever been able to say that quitting smoking.

I am also really hyper on the phone and am getting my words mixed up a bit talking to people. I sound like a total basket case!!