Vegetarian Chocolate Bunny Boiler
 

I have a bit of a situation at work. A slim, young co-worker has taken to putting out chocolate on her desk, one piece at a time. I constantly have to walk past her desk so this morning I asked why the chocolate. She said it was for me! She knows I'm a low carber and she's watched me shrink down to a size 6 by losing 35lbs. She also knows I love that brand of chocolate and once I've had a piece I'll be back to her asking for another...and another...and another. That's how it used to be before I got control of the insulin rollercoaster. The only hope I have is to resist that first piece. So why is she doing this? I truly believe she's a nice person and isn't harboring any hidden enmity toward me. We laugh together and seem to get along fine. She's either trying to sabotage me or she is offering 'chocolate as kindness/friendship'. But given that she's seen my struggle with weight for 18 months, seen me win the battle, and already has my friendship, that doesn't make sense.

It's hard to know how to deal with this other than just gritting my teeth and bearing it until she realizes, whatever her motive is, that it's not working and gives up. This morning I just laughed and said "What, are you trying to train me like a puppy or something?". She laughed too, but when I walked by again later there were TWO pieces of chocolate for me. I'm posting this because I'm a bit weirded out by it. Thanks for listening.

That is some bizarre behavior.

Well, turn the training around on her. Train her that you aren't interested. Then be sure NOT to look at her desk as you pass by so you won't be tempted.

Sorry - she sounds like a schmuck. That's my uninformed take on it anyway ;)

No point in worrying over it though - I'd take the direct approach and tell her that you appreciate the thought but these days you're tempted by the Men's Health models, not chocolates...and if she takes to putting those on her desk for you, please, please give me a call. I'll help you out! :lol:

I'd say it's a combination of jealousy, sabotage, bafflement (she just doesn't get how you can eat the way you do, resist the foods you do, have the willpower you do, etc), and a game/experiment.

If it's for you. Maybe you should take it and toss it in the trash, where it belongs. A little showing that trashy foods are not for you. She'll eventually quit leaving it out for you.

Wow, thank you for those quick responses. I'm so glad I posted because I think you are all right and it's helped me get a better handle on this bizarre behavior. I hadn't considered the bafflement and game thing but both make clear sense to me now you mention it. She's a low-calorie, no-fat person (with a drawer full of candy) so the way I eat and stay slim must totally baffle her, even though I've offered to send her articles explaining it. I do believe it's an experiment of some kind and I'm the bloody guinea pig, LOL!

Okay, it's ON! I'll resist this temptation now even if it means I have to go to the ladies room and bang my head on the wall! And I'm definitely using the 'Men's Health models' line.

Maybe she's just trying to lure you to her desk to talk to her. Maybe you can say something like, "I'll stop by to chat more if your promise to stop leaving chocolate for me."

OMG, OMG. She just handed me a brochure of chocolates, opened to a double page spread of exotic concoctions. I glanced at it briefly and said "I'm so grateful that stuff doesn't appeal to me any more" and she said, in a jokey-teasing sort of way "Liar!". This is really becoming strange. But I'll tell you this, I'd choke down a raw lump of liver in front of her now before I eat a chocolate!

Occam's Razor says it's passive-aggressive, resentful behavior.

Sounds like she wants to be THE slim, attractive gal.
I don't think she's your friend.

Wow ...sounds like the devil in disguise...muwahahaha.
JK of course but she is being evil. I agree with the post above ...tell her you would stop by her desk more if the chocolate WASN'T there. Tell her also that chocolate affects your blood sugar levels so even though you like it, you can't eat it and remain healthy...not even in moderation or small portions.
Good luck.

Hmmm... maybe it'd be best to ask her: "Are you trying to sabotage my efforts?"

That'll make her think a little... hopefully.

Who cares why she's doing it? If you resist it and ignore it, there is no problem.

Those of us on special eating plans are going to have landmines thrown up our entire lives.

Ignoring the gesture is better, it means you're not engaged at all psychologically with the action.

Why bother trying to psychoanalyze a coworker? There shouldn't even be a dog in the hunt.

She already knows that, I must have said it a hundred times.

I had also wondered, fleetingly, if the chocolate might be a lure to have me stop by and hang out a while (her job can get kind of isolated and boring). But I'm hesitant to tell her the chocolate is keeping me away because it's a flat-out admission that I CAN be tempted by it and that might encourage her more if the aim is sabotage.

I guess Occam's Razor would want me to stop overthinking this. It makes me sad, the idea that she might not be my friend afterall.

Well, I got through today. Let's see what happens tomorrow.

I saw your picture. You're pretty and thin! As some of the other posters said, it sounds like she was the thin, pretty person in the office and doesn't like you as competition. It's a compliment in a mean-spirited kind of way. She sees you as a threat. Maybe she'll gain 50 pounds. LOL. Ok, I didn't mean that --Ok, maybe I meant it a little.