What to do when OH is not on board

[jaywood]

Ok so need some advice on this one, and a female perspective would be good :help:.

What do you guys do when the other half is not on board with the whole low carb thing?

A bit of background. Mrs JW is a practicing GP, so has no time or belief in the low carb diets, and took a lot of convincing that Atkins died of a blow to the head not clogged arteries!
Second point and sometimes more important. She is good Irish stock, this means that the potato (yes the demon sugar cube dressed up as a vegetable) is served with just about eery meal. Meals that do not contain potatoes are closer to snaking than meal times.

So..... being that she was the one who really thought I was fat and needing to loose the weight, agreed that I a low carb plan would be "alright" is now a bit narked that I won't sit down and eat potatoes and veg with her.

SO please someone help out here.

(on another note, I do most of the cooking, so preparing meals is not a problem just need a way of persuading a Doctor that just simply reducing my portion size is not going to do anything!)

[Kristine]

If it were me, I'd minimize the high fat aspect of a low carb plan, and then just wow her with good, quality meals that happen to fit your low-carb bill. Roasted chicken with broccoli. An omelet with bell peppers and asparagus. Colourful salads. Homemade soups and stews. It's pretty hard to argue the healthiness of that, isn't it? No one ever died because they skipped the starch serving of dinner. :idea:

I'd also recommend that you two agree to disagree. Make it YOUR business to feed yourself, and her business to feed herself. Food fights will ruin relationships.

Good luck. :wave:

[slimby30]

I hear ya..

My husband refused the idea of low carb at first (he's an MD too), although he is overweight too, he thought I was killing myself, and attributed ANY headache I got to hypoglycemia (note: I have migraines lol)..

Anyway, after I lost about 20 lbs he read a lot of research around low carb-high fat, and eventually started Atkins with me..
And he probably lost more weight than I did..

Bottom line, you won't be able to convince her (it's like a theist/atheist convo), but let your results speak for themselves.. And better yet, draw some blood and check you lytes then have a follow up and show her the results :)

Evidence based medicine style ;)

[Verbena]

If potatoes are a problem for you, i.e. if you see them you want to eat them, then I would let her know that that is why they can't be on the table - you will overeat if they are, like having candy or cookies under your nose (should be an argument she understands) If they are not a problem, and as you are doing the cooking, then make them for her, and just don't serve any for you. But, as noted above, make really nice meals that you can eat, and that she can enjoy too. You might also downplay the "low carb" subject, and talk more of "avoiding starches" or something along those lines. Sometimes it is language that triggers response, and I can imagine that a GP might get a knee jerk reaction to the words "low carb".

[ojoj]

Tell her to read some of the new research rather than allow herself to be spoonfed the NHS low fat mantra !! Remind her she has a scientific mind and to use it!!!!!!

And then be firm that you want to give this a fair try - just for two weeks!!! Thats what I told everyone when I started this..... 11 years ago and still following it

Jo xxx

[Bonnie OFS]

Food fights will ruin relationships.

Definitely. I've had to back off from criticisms of food my husband chooses to eat away from home. I was turning into a nag. :(

Of course, he can't tell me how wonderful it is, smack his lips, or eat it close enough to me that I can smell it. :nono:

[emily30]

The following link contains several other links to cited and peer reviewed journals and studies. I'd start by having her read some of these.

Studies Proving The Safety and Efficacy of the Low Carb Diet

http://www.phlaunt.com/diabetes/19066498.php

(I'm not quite sure of the forum rules and etiquette for posting links, sorry)

[Verbena]

Tell her to read some of the new research rather than allow herself to be spoonfed the NHS low fat mantra !! Remind her she has a scientific mind and to use it!!!!!!

And then be firm that you want to give this a fair try - just for two weeks!!! Thats what I told everyone when I started this..... 11 years ago and still following it

Jo xxx

:lol: Jo! This is exactly what DH and I said when we got married - tongue in cheek - "We'll give it a try for 2 weeks, see how it goes". Now we just say "well, the 2 weeks isn't over yet ;) ". It'll be 40 years in September, but the 2 weeks isn't over yet.

Sorry for the off topic side track.

[KDH]

My DH wasn't against LC, but for sure thought I was a little nuts when I met him. Ironically, LC was the ONLY thing my ex and I came together over, lost over 100lbs each doing it together. (Which he has gained back, as his now, not exactly svelte, wife is a firm believer in low fat hearthealthywholegrains) Was a weird conversation with my DH, as he has never had an ounce of weight issues, and has never known me as morbidly obese. (I did pack some pounds on a few years ago, but NEVER back to over 200!)

Luckily he has an open mind and is into researching stuff like this. And when he saw some possible health benefits that could apply to HIM, he tried it. Hasn't eaten grain or starch in a couple years now, and won't go back to the GI issues and other things it has cured for him. He does still eat some ice cream though, lol! His only real sugar.

Forget weight loss, point out other things. Lots of them. Make her drink from a fire hydrant over this. Something should get through, and that's all you need!

[Whofan]

My mother was from County Wexford so I had to smile about you having potatoes at every meal. Not only did we have them at every meal, but sometimes we ONLY had potatoes AS a meal or a snack. Not because we were particularly poor, but because we just loved the taste of them, usually boiled and served with salt and huge amounts of Kerrygold butter. If my sweet little mother were alive today I'd have a serious problem trying to convince her I don't eat potatoes.

But your wife is a doctor and well educated (except in nutrition, obviously). Show her articles about the glycemic load of potatoes, the insulin response it causes, and the fat storage caused by that response (and not by the fat you eat). Then let her eat potatoes and any other starch without judging or commenting further. Just don't eat them yourself. Same goes for all the other foods you won't eat. Don't make her feel diminished but stick to you guns, calmly without arguing, and white-knuckle it if her food really tempts you. That'll pass quickly if you don't give in. Good luck.

[jaywood]

Thanks for all the replies and useful suggestions.

We basically were falling out over fruit juice of all things Rather than the potatoes which have been a running battle for as long as we have been together, unless they are chips / fry's then the are the food of the gods!

My hope is to lead her down the path by basically making meals which fit into the low carb plan, my concern is that if she carries on eating the sugars I'm probably going to be doing her a huge health blow!!!

I have made it though this day with out mentioning the words low carb, or avoiding, and just simply did dinner with meat having meat stew (no carbs) and served with potatoes OH.

I will also continue with the gentle education front. But that is a struggle and a half. The teaching they get on nutrition is poor, most practices don't have access to a dietitian and then the role of dietetics is to help sick people gain weight, not healthy people lose weight.

I definitely need to expand my diet after the induction period to include more of the veg, like peppers and asparagus, and hopefully when that happens hopefully things will be a bit easier.

(just as a note: most of my cooking skills is directed to cakes and deserts, I make birthday, and celebration cakes on a small scale to order)

I also think it does not help that we are both quite bull headed! and stubborn. but then that is also why we are together! :-).

[WereBear]

Get one of those free blood sugar meters, and show her the numbers.

That's talking her language.

[Robin120]

Get one of those free blood sugar meters, and show her the numbers.

That's talking her language.

love this idea!

as far as your concern re: if she continues with sugars, but you are cooking lowcarb, it will a health blow for her.....it does not have to be.
i cooked low carb for my ex-husabnd, but he still ate sandwiches for lunch, fruit and chips for snacks....and he still lost weight (he was a healthy weight to start with, but became more muscular/leaner while we were together).

The trick is prepare things that can work for both- for example, broccoli roasted in EVOO is good for anyone, whereas broccili in acream and cheese sauce would not be first pick for someone eating carbs.

[sexym2]

I don't think educating her is going to help, she has her mind made up. I sappose diets can ruin a marriage and this is going to sound terribly mean but if my other half can't live and gets permanently nasty about my change in eating habits I don't want that shitty attitude around.

BF is great, he's not fond that I don't eat normal foods but as long as I fix a potatoe with every meal and he can have his junk food he's content. So i make a meat, a potatoe and a veggie with every meal and I just don't eat the potatoes. If he didn't like it I would tell him where to stick it and he would get mad or get over it, its my body not his. The same goes for the juice, she can't make you drink it, just don't. If she makes it and gives it to you say "no thanks" and walk away. The same will apply, she will get mad and then get over it or not. If she can't handle the way you choose to eat, I can't emagine wanting to be married to a person like that.

I'm not thrilled with the way BF eats but its his body and he's an adult and I make the occasional comment but let it go. No point in fighting a loosing battle.

[ojoj]

yeah, confrontation when both are headstrong isnt going to help. I think the "let me try my silly way for a couple of weeks" approach is better.

Jo xxx

[DeannaK]

This is some good stuff!!

My DH (and dog) enjoy that crap "ad nauseum" to me. He's happy and so is his doctor about his "numbers" but I wish they would take a different approach. He's been on Crestor for 2 years and the recent articles about ditching statins has truly gotten his attention (FINALLY). He has been complaining of acid reflux and unexplained aches and pains...

I refuse to nag...he's an adult and can make his own choices. I can only provide the information I come across. And so that's what I have done...I pass on the articles to let him read, if he chooses.

I cook...when I fix stuff that doesn't fit my WOE, I either eat something else or not. My choice. But most often, I fix a good meal for us all adding for DH and DSS the starch they want.

I'm sure he thinks I'm nuts too...especially when I don't want something or just eat the meat and skip the veggies. BUT, once again, it is my choice.

Just my thoughts -
Deanna

[Elizellen]

We basically were falling out over fruit juice of all things .
Has she not noticed the recent press furore in the UK about how fruit juices are virtually liquid sugar and should be restricted if not avoided altogether??

[TiredFedUP]

In every single published scientific study comparing lowcarbing to lowcalorie regimens, the low-carb diet provides equal or greater weight loss than the low-calorie one, and GREATER improvements in lipid profiles. This has been going on for over a decade (or longer?); there are even meta-analyses (pooling results from several studies) that document this simple fact.

Just stick with it (humbly). She'll get curious and start looking into it.

Hang in there!! (by the way, when you juice a fruit it loses just about anything good for you... just sugar water is left really).

[Just Jo]

Jaywood, I have nothing useful to add, since all those above posted pretty much all the sage advice but I am :roll: on the floor :lol: about the yes the demon sugar cube dressed up as a vegetable statement. That is so funny... thanks for the chuckle and I agree completely.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Success is not Final. Failure is not Fatal.
It’s the Courage to Continue that Counts.” Winston Churchill

[Bonnie OFS]

I am :roll: on the floor :lol: about the yes the demon sugar cube dressed up as a vegetable statement. That is so funny... thanks for the chuckle and I agree completely.

[b][I][center] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After I was diagnosed as diabetic, but long before I was ready to change my diet, a friend called the humble potato "a sugar cube in a jacket." That gave me pause. It was also the first chink in the armor of my denial. A little humor goes a long way in getting a point across.

[jaywood]

One thing that this site needs is a multi-quote button to answer each and every point :-).

These response are great and cover such a wide variety of opinions. I think however, you all put forward valid points. Yes the gentle education is on-going and is likely to fail! However, I have been doing it for a long time, regardless of my own diet and will continue to do so.
The problem is that like a good NHS doctor she is happy to follow the guidelines. This to me is not a good attitude. ONly recently she was at a conference where she was told the truths about BMI's healthy range, and fitness vs obesity. Both of which I have harped on about for years!

As for the falling out, I will do my best to ignore, I think when I start adding in veg to my diet, and come of the induction phase, (hopefully 3 - 4 weeks to go) then I will be able to make dinners that fit her my bill which are acceptable.

I don't think it is worth it just yet to start seeing an end to Mrs JW. I think that would be a little drastic. But you are quite right about acceptance and compramise.

Only time will tell.

[TiredFedUP]

Hang in there! We're all with you!

By the way, I've got the creepy feeling the Monsanto and co. had a hand in writing the current nutrition guidelines.

[sexym2]

Acceptance and compramise, isn't that what we all want in a relationship?

I agree, you have to give her time to "accept," I didn't say like it or even agree with it. Hell if BF and I broke up every time we dissagreed about my show rabbits, well, I'd have givin up on him :lol: He has come to accept my expensive hobby and just frowns at me know.

[jaywood]

I thought I would give a wee update on this thread.

So what did I do:
I managed to engineer a conversation about some hard core hormone pathways, following on from a lecture she had attended. This was on the hope that she would actually believe I know what the hell I am talking about.
success: some.

We booked in to start Cross-fit. So we head down to the first session two weeks ago. At the session this week she actually made the comment about how I did in-fact look different when I was standing.

This was kind of the opening I needed, and yes this is all about low carb, and the fact that I had lost 11lbs in 2 weeks of low carb compared to 6 lbs in 5 weeks of just exercise.

So there is an understanding that what I am doing is working, and a degree of acceptance that she and I will not be eating the same dinners any time soon.

Thank's for all the input and suggestions from all of you. Its much appreciated :-)

[Elizellen]

I am glad you have been able to defuse the situation somewhat! :thup:

[DeannaK]

Definitely a win-win for you both.

I would love to eat like my DH...but that just isn't happening. It's not good for me or my health or my waistline, arse and everything else that's attached!

Glad things have settled down a bit!

Deanna

[lynys1980]

I do the cooking, so he either cooks for himself, or shuts up and eats. :P

[ojoj]

I do the cooking, so he either cooks for himself, or shuts up and eats. :P


That sums us up too lol!!!

Jo xxx

[Just Jo]

I do the cooking, so he either cooks for himself, or shuts up and eats. :P


LOL that's how it works in my house too. The DH went from 220 lbs to 207 lbs (he's 6'4") I call it collateral dieting! If he wants to eat carbs, he has to cook it himself and he usually does that for lunch when I am at school. :D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Success is not Final. Failure is not Fatal.
It’s the Courage to Continue that Counts.” Winston Churchill

[sexym2]

I usually fix the meat and veggie and if I just feel lazy I use the excuse that I don't eat the extra side, if you want it, then you fix it :lol: Most of the time he will fix it :lol: but not always.

With relationships and marriage both parties have to be open to each others ideas otherwise its ganna be rough.

[Merpig]

LOL that's how it works in my house too. The DH went from 220 lbs to 207 lbs (he's 6'4") I call it collateral dieting! Sounds like my poor sister and her hubby. She started cooking all low carb, and didn't lose an ounce even over the course of several weeks, but her hubby (he's 6'3") went from 160 pounds to 150 and looked like he was melting away! He had to start eating 5 sandwiches at lunchtime instead of his usual 3 to get the weight back on. :D

[Bonnie OFS]

Sounds like my poor sister and her hubby. She started cooking all low carb, and didn't lose an ounce even over the course of several weeks, but her hubby (he's 6'3") went from 160 pounds to 150 and looked like he was melting away! He had to start eating 5 sandwiches at lunchtime instead of his usual 3 to get the weight back on. :D

That's what has happened here. It's a real struggle for me to lose weight, but my husband lost more than 10 pounds without even trying. He's always been what is usually described as "wiry" - he sure didn't need to lose anything. I now encourage him to eat more and even cook side dishes especially for him. He definitely doesn't need to be as low-carb as I am.

[angeliqua]

I see some similarities in our relationships, Jay :)

I have been struggling with my BF for months about his unacceptance of my decisions. In the beginning, our arguing would soon turn into a fight. He just doesn't get it, he thinks it is torture and it's unnecessary. With time, he learned to control himself from giving bad comments...now he usually rolles his eyes everytime I go eat. I am kind of happy that he is better with me now, but it is still not enaugh to me. I want him to truly accept it as part of who I am. I would never give him that attitude when I see him eating hazelnut cream with a spoon. I did say my opinion on that, so what's the point in running after him and giving him lectures on health, it's his life. I want the same treatment. He ruined my mindset so many times, don't let that happen to you.
I've given up fighting and explaining anything about LC. It still bothers me a lot that we didn't overcome it by now, but I hope we will. I decided to just go with the flow: I will do my thing the best I can and can only hope for him to eventually adopt healthier eating habits. I really want him to feel refreshed and energized as I do.
Give her time, concentrate on yourself...it's easier said than done,but that's all I can say to you.
Best of luck :)

[jaywood]

I see some similarities in our relationships, Jay :)

I have been struggling with my BF for months about his unacceptance of my decisions. In the beginning, our arguing would soon turn into a fight. He just doesn't get it, he thinks it is torture and it's unnecessary. With time, he learned to control himself from giving bad comments...now he usually rolles his eyes everytime I go eat. I am kind of happy that he is better with me now, but it is still not enaugh to me. I want him to truly accept it as part of who I am. I would never give him that attitude when I see him eating hazelnut cream with a spoon. I did say my opinion on that, so what's the point in running after him and giving him lectures on health, it's his life. I want the same treatment. He ruined my mindset so many times, don't let that happen to you.
I've given up fighting and explaining anything about LC. It still bothers me a lot that we didn't overcome it by now, but I hope we will. I decided to just go with the flow: I will do my thing the best I can and can only hope for him to eventually adopt healthier eating habits. I really want him to feel refreshed and energized as I do.
Give her time, concentrate on yourself...it's easier said than done,but that's all I can say to you.
Best of luck :)

All the best to you to, and stay strong and ignore him.

Its the little snide comments and looks that are actually worse than a full blown discussion / argument. Which is the stage we are at now.

I get away with using the training in the evening as a way of avoiding eating together, but again not really a sustainable plan, more of a diverting tactic.

Being it has only been 3 weeks, I can't really comment on a long term solution or outcome, but I'll be doing my best to stick to the program :agree: .

[angeliqua]

Exactly!
Every person can succeed at changing their lifestyle. Look at all these experienced low carbers here :D we are in the right place...with positive mindset, there is no chance you won't make it.
You are showing great respect for your wife and her opinion means a lot to you, if she can put you out of balance like that. Now it is your turn to show her that she has to respect that.


Don't get me wrong, I am probably even worse at standing up for myself then you are...but hey, I am working on that one.
Imagine if I told you I was on/off LC because of what someone else said...You would probably think it is funny and kind of stupid :P Even I do...
You will do it and you will feel amazing...your wife is going to be fascinated with your dedication and success :)

[KDH]

Funny thing, my ex husband and I lost over 100 pounds each doing LC together back in 2002-3. Divorced in 2008, and have both since remarried to people who flat-out thought the idea of restricting carbs instead of calories was insane. My husband listened, tried it, and has enjoyed the health benefits that have resulted. (No weight to lose, but other issues) His wife refuses to even consider it, and stocks the house with healthywholegrain, low-fat snacks and lots of fresh fruit. He is back to morbidly obese, I am not.

Not saying that you can't do it without your other half on board, but it sure helps. A lot!!

[Just Jo]

Sounds like my poor sister and her hubby. She started cooking all low carb, and didn't lose an ounce even over the course of several weeks, but her hubby (he's 6'3") went from 160 pounds to 150 and looked like he was melting away! He had to start eating 5 sandwiches at lunchtime instead of his usual 3 to get the weight back on. :D


Not only did the DH lose weight but my little dog went in for his yearly check up last week and lost 2 lbs (weighed 12 lbs last April) cause he isn't getting his carb-crap table scraps any more, he's eating clean - tuna, broiled fish and chicken breast. :D

This WOE affects the people (and animals) around us too! :)

Wishing all of us continued success on our personal LC WOE journeys!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Success is not Final. Failure is not Fatal.
It’s the Courage to Continue that Counts.” Winston Churchill

[jaywood]

Well we might have turned a significant corner on this one.

First off the change in my body is now really quite obvious. a loss of 5 inch round the belly and finally some one takes note.

Now that she can see that the "madness" of a kebab and cream diet works she does not see it as madness, but is hoping I can make it a WOE and a WOL.

Now for the issue. Since I have been loosing on a high fat no carb diet, and I do the cooking, the knock on effect today was that she has noticed that she now has a belly (when we got together she had the six pack). This is an issue only because for me to keep eating enough fat she needs to cut out her sugars.

Soooo I am now looking at the non-extream ie. not A72 induction diet - which is I think the closest to what I am on. Thinking of looking at paleo as an alternative.

But the upside is she is on board with it from my point of view :-).

[Aradasky]

My well educated hubby did not get on board until I was losing weight and my blood numbers all came back very good. Then he started and now we are both much healthier.

There are many docs still not educated in LC, but there are many others coming around. Diabetic nutritionist, too. Even our govt USA, is sort of starting to accept the fact that fat is good for us. SHOCK! We have a long way to go, but if we can start with us as guinea pigs then maybe our results will change minds. :thup:

Good for you for working around your obstacles! Many do well on paleo, I would have a hard time with fruit. I am insulin sensitive and really need to keep carbs under control.

[Fathead]

Good job Jaywood, I am trying to remain civil with my wife about these things as well. She maintains the "Vegetarian" way is probably the best. I try not to argue and tell her let my health do the talking and make up your mind in a few months.

On a side note my wife was floored when I went outside cleaned up three downed trees, mowed and weedeated a huge part of land. Oh before going in and working 10 hours and getting up the next day without hurting like a beat up old dog. I want to let my actions do the talking first.

[jaywood]

Good job Jaywood, I am trying to remain civil with my wife about these things as well. She maintains the "Vegetarian" way is probably the best. I try not to argue and tell her let my health do the talking and make up your mind in a few months.

On a side note my wife was floored when I went outside cleaned up three downed trees, mowed and weedeated a huge part of land. Oh before going in and working 10 hours and getting up the next day without hurting like a beat up old dog. I want to let my actions do the talking first.

if you have not read all this thread, do so :-). There is some really good advice on it as to how to go about it.

My only advice, which maybe I should have taken, is don't be a hot head :agree:

ok maybe not my only advice, the other bit is don't go on a major health diet just after she has spent a load of cash on a fancy suit for you :D

[Fathead]

Excellent advice Jaywood, good no matter what the subject is.

I am actually finding it much much easier to not be a hot head. I just feel so stable that it is easier to control my anger and therefore my tongue.

I handle her gently as should any gentlemen with a lady, and let her know I respect her concerns and oppinions but to please respect mine.

I was the guy hooked up in the ER due to chest pains and blood pressure would not come down at 35, after being on a Vegetarian diet for almost 2 years and experiencing so much pain I knew I had to dig deeper for the truth. I did lose weight but it was due to calorie restriction and cutting out added sugar for the most part. And of course it all came back.

She has not dug deeper yet but I know she will. It is not easy when before you were even born it was a well accpeted lie that fat leads to heart disease. It is deeply engrained in our generation we grew up being pelted by low fat labels on everything especially candy.

I bought the China Study hook line and sinker. I am a logical person by nature I literally make my living off of cause and affect. And damnit if that wasn't some fine cherry picked correlating data. This was a great life lesson for me I have since learned to be an even better critical thinker and look at what the opposition says always.

[ParisMama]

Fathead, if your wife is a reader, the new book The Big Fat Surprise by Nina Teitholz is very good, very readable and very clear about the lousy science behind all the low-fat advice. And she doesn't smack anyone upside the head with "the answer is low carb" in the way Gary Taubes does, it's much subtler, giving credit to the reader to draw the (obvious) conclusion.

[jmh6251]

My hubby did do lc with me for awhile, but he missed his potato's and rice So he quit. He also ate a donut if it were offered to him and could not pass up french fries at a fast food restaurant. So I really don't think his heart was in it. He says he will never lowcarb again and i shouldn't either. Well I make up my own mind about what I put in my mouth, and personally there is no going back for me. But I won't tell him how to eat either. You will have to have her read some of the literature that was previously suggested, but you may have to agree to disagree.

[KDH]

My hubby did do lc with me for awhile, but he missed his potato's and rice So he quit. He also ate a donut if it were offered to him and could not pass up french fries at a fast food restaurant. So I really don't think his heart was in it. He says he will never lowcarb again and i shouldn't either. Well I make up my own mind about what I put in my mouth, and personally there is no going back for me. But I won't tell him how to eat either. You will have to have her read some of the literature that was previously suggested, but you may have to agree to disagree.

Curious, did he say why you shouldn't eat low carb? Does he think you will suffer from a french fry and donout deficiency? It's funny, I can kind of see the point from those that shovel in their 12 grain servings a day with "health food" offerings. They honestly believe that they are eating something your body is going to become putrid and diseased without. On the other hand, you have the people who will criticize you for... a lack of junk food? :q:

[jmh6251]

He claims I will never stick to the plan, that it is too hard. He also says you only live once and you should devour all the junk that you can. I have a bad feeling if he keeps this up I will outlive him. It's no wonder he is always tired

[Quasimodo]

No advice here, but I was just saying to myself that there ARE going to be people who don't understand the high fat, low carb idea, simply because it's what we've been taught all of our lives to follow. My MIL was just saying that the answer is portion sizes. I just agreed to disagree (in my mind) and said that the only way I lose weight is to eat low carb, and that I believe that each person needs to choose the WOE that fits them best and helps them to remain trim. The conversation ended a little weird, but I think for us who eat this way that is STILL treated as totally unconventional and wacky, we just have to come to terms with the fact that it's going to be that way.

It's harder when it's your spouse/significant other, of course. My husband believes that margarine is better for you than butter, and still tries to eat low fat. I had to quit trying to make him eat "my way" and just do what I have to do. It sucks, and it makes things harder, but I am the only one responsible for my weight loss or gain, so there is that.

I liked what someone said about you being responsible for your eating and her be responsible for hers. It might be difficult for her to think that you aren't driving your health right into the ground, though. I know is this is an old thread, so I hope you have gotten this worked out. Gonna read the rest right now.

[khrussva]

Curious, did he say why you shouldn't eat low carb? Does he think you will suffer from a french fry and donout deficiency? It's funny, I can kind of see the point from those that shovel in their 12 grain servings a day with "health food" offerings. They honestly believe that they are eating something your body is going to become putrid and diseased without. On the other hand, you have the people who will criticize you for... a lack of junk food? :q:

I wouldn't expect such a dumb comment from a woman. But I could see a man saying such nonsense. It is kind of the assumed leader point of view. "If I do it, then it must be right". The thought (or lack of) about what is actually being said doesn't often go much deeper then that. I've been guilty of it.

[jaywood]

Well we had an interesting experience this morning!

I have bought myself a blood glucose / ketone monitor. More for fun than any specific reasoning. So I got it yesterday, and decided to see what things were saying first thing this morning (or after at least a 12 hour fast.

So my blood sugar was 5.3 which was higher than expected but not at all a problem, ketones where 0.7 which if they stay at that level apparently I need to see a doctor LOL.

Then OH decided that she would see what her's were.
glucose 6.0 ketones 0.0

now 6.0 is the limit for what is pre diabetes, some say below six some say six is ok. But either way its still on the cusp and she got herself quite in a tissy.

Don't know what the outcome of this will be in the long term, but she is now seriously thinking that something needs to change.

[JEY100]

Keeping below 6 is important to avoid damage from diabetic complications, but one test with a home meter just could be off. Though if it helps her decide to join you eating more LC that's good. :)
Consider testing more days fasting levels, and 1 and 2 hour after meals, and an HbA1c.
http://www.lowcarbdiabetic.co.uk/The%20Tool%20Kit.htm

[Skimo]

He also says you only live once and you should devour all the junk that you can. I have a bad feeling if he keeps this up I will outlive him. It's no wonder he is always tired

I have almost the same one at home... he always refers to the magic skin tale by Balzac, do you know it?

[jaywood]

Keeping below 6 is important to avoid damage from diabetic complications, but one test with a home meter just could be off. Though if it helps her decide to join you eating more LC that's good. :)
Consider testing more days fasting levels, and 1 and 2 hour after meals, and an HbA1c.
http://www.lowcarbdiabetic.co.uk/The%20Tool%20Kit.htm


Will do.

I am also going to get her to do a glucose tolerance test.

but hopefully it is simply a kick in the right direction. That I would prefer.

[Fathead]

Well I have to give an update. I love it when others do so I should as well.

Wife is really noticing the difference, she called me skinny boy because of my appearance in my now oversized work clothes. I lost 2 inches on my waist but weight loss is stopped for the moment. But this is about fat loss not weight loss. Everyone is noticing the difference and asks how much I have lost.

My wife no longer nags or argues seems impressed even a bit jelous at times. She will cook my WOE meals for me just to help out and be supportive.

[Glendora]

Well I have to give an update. I love it when others do so I should as well.

Wife is really noticing the difference, she called me skinny boy because of my appearance in my now oversized work clothes. I lost 2 inches on my waist but weight loss is stopped for the moment. But this is about fat loss not weight loss. Everyone is noticing the difference and asks how much I have lost.

My wife no longer nags or argues seems impressed even a bit jelous at times. She will cook my WOE meals for me just to help out and be supportive.

This is great news!

[WereBear]

What kept me going through the relatives who were certain I was wrong and all the yelling on the TV about the "right" way to eat was that, aside from the steady, un-tormented weight loss, I also hadn't felt so good in ages.

I can't argue with that.

[zoogirl]

I have to agree with WereBear here, I am a newbie, and I have definitely had LOTS of criticism from my OH. I am not a fighter, so I simply ignore, I cannot argue with how good I feel. I started this new lifestyle in Nov/13, originally to "just drop a few pounds fast" I have been pleasantly surprised how much I love this entire concept, I have not had a medical check up, one is scheduled for September, I'm confident that all will be OK.