GreenFern
Tue, Jan-07-14, 00:26
The process of learning about my body and my mind, and my relationship with food has been an ongoing struggle, but one that i, up until recently, had thought i had mostly figured out... but I guess i have more to learn because some thing in my body have gone haywire, and i lost it and fell off the wagon, as much as a person with gluten, dairy and corn allergies can do. what i realize is that..my body maintains weight loss well, and, will gain it very quickly if i deviate at all from the path i had chosen and stuck to for a pretty long time.
Last year in jan i was about 180, i set a goal for 175 by march 1st, my brthday and reached it! and since then went down to about 162 was my lowest.. i was 163 in november. i am 180 today. and i honestly can say i dont know how that has happened. im so devistated and angry at my body and myself for somehow letting it happen, and confused and sad. i have worked So hard to get where i was..and now im back where i was a year ago, but then i felt amazing, i had lost quite a lot of weight, now at the same weight, i feel defeated and unwell. strange how that happens.
so i am back. and more determined than ever to figure this out. i know it has so much to do wwith sugar and carbs, but also with my mental health.. i do moderate, so much more than most and yet i gain 20lbs in 2 months.... so frustrating and motivating at the same time. i will figure this out and reach my goal this year. i know i will...
Last year in jan i was about 180, i set a goal for 175 by march 1st, my brthday and reached it! and since then went down to about 162 was my lowest.. i was 163 in november. i am 180 today. and i honestly can say i dont know how that has happened. im so devistated and angry at my body and myself for somehow letting it happen, and confused and sad. i have worked So hard to get where i was..and now im back where i was a year ago, but then i felt amazing, i had lost quite a lot of weight, now at the same weight, i feel defeated and unwell. strange how that happens.
so i am back. and more determined than ever to figure this out. i know it has so much to do wwith sugar and carbs, but also with my mental health.. i do moderate, so much more than most and yet i gain 20lbs in 2 months.... so frustrating and motivating at the same time. i will figure this out and reach my goal this year. i know i will...