just a Vent but Please Opine

[MermaidGir]

i've been having probs with my peiod for over a year...my regular dr is a DO and I've been seeing her for about 8 yrs. So over the past few months, we've done some tests and stuff but nothing comes up...so my bff had the same symptoms and wound up having to have a hysterectomy and so I reviewed her dx online and it's very similar to my stuff. I'm not trying to BE a dr, just be informed and be an active partner in my healthcare.
I went to see her (the DO) yesterday and told her what I thought (adenomyosis) and she said, What, cause you googled something? Gimme a break.
Over 8 yrs she's never been snide or rude to me, and I've been a regular patient, not high maintentance or anything.
I am SO MAD. I've decided not to see her anymore because I am PAYING for this service but still, don't you guys think that was uncalled for, for her to be snide??

[MermaidGir]

sorry, *PERIOD

[Hybrid]

I'd tell her, "If you're going to have House's attitude, you also need House's expertise. Seeing as you are unable to diagnose me, you obviously lack the latter. Without the latter, I will not tolerate the former. I can handle a rude genius, and I can handle a congenial idiot. I refuse to tolerate a rude idiot, especially not with something as important as my body."

[MermaidGir]

oh, that's good! thanks Hybrid!!

[Gostrydr]

Hybrid does have a way with words...

[Nancy LC]

Doctor's are scared of the Internet because it challenges their authority. In the past they were the keepers of the lore, now anyone with a few wits can learn what they know.

I've run into that a bit but not with the major attitude like that.

You didn't mention what the problem with your period is so I'm completely in the dark. I've run into women who went low carb and those issues cleared up, same with gluten free. Sometimes there can be lurking issues with food intolerances.

Have then done an ultra-sound done? Do you have fibroids or polyps?

Anyway, sounds like you uncovered an insecure doctor. Who knows, maybe she's got good reason to be insecure.

[Terry-24]

I am SO MAD. I've decided not to see her anymore because I am PAYING for this service but still, don't you guys think that was uncalled for, for her to be snide??
Yes, there's no excuse for dissing a patient. I'm sorry this happened to you.

If you're serious about leaving her medical practice after eight years, it would be good to let her know why exactly, as you have said here: a very short note would give her the lot. Letting her know why you've left won't benefit you, but it may her next patient.

Cheers--
Terry-24

[MermaidGir]

the prob is frequent (less than 21-days) heavy menses, going on over a year now...I've had tests to see if I'm perimenopausal (no) and also ultrasound for fibroids (no). Adenomyosis is one of those process-of-elimination disorders; however I've had all of the things known to cause it (miscarriage, tubal ligation, c-section) so...
And yes, I *have* composed a note. I'm trying to edit it down, LOL, from the RANT that I really want to lay on her!

[kebaldwin]

I have no advice regarding your specific problem - but can tell you this.

I went to - I don't know how many doctors, nurses, specialtists - and all they came up with was surgery, prescription drugs, and medical devices.

I knew something was at the root cause and did my own research. I quickly discovered a cause-and-effect with sugar and from there discovered Dr Atkins work. Within months of starting Atkins diet - I had no need for any of the medical advice prescribed by the experts and was working my way off of their prescriptions.

So if you are persistent, and don't give in, you will discover the root cause, and discover a solution that works for you.

[Hybrid]

Your average doctor has an IQ of 110. That's above the IQ of the general population, but this does mean that a significant minority of patients will be smarter than their doctors.

They have the arduous task of trying to diagnose just about anything that anyone could see them about. Your task is simply to diagnose yourself.

I trust self-diagnosis. However, humans in general are trained to believe appeals to authority.

Spend a day watching TV. You can get up and go to the bathroom during the shows, but stay riveted to the commercials. Every time you see a man with grey hair and a lab coat, remind yourself, "this is an actor" and then pay attention to what he's trying to communicate to you. The message will always be, "buy this product." The only reason why people listen to the actor is, of course, he is a grey-haired man in a lab coat.

There is appeal to authority, and there is appeal to logic and reason. Most people are utterly unresponsive to the former.

[MermaidGir]

well thanks you guys...I do question myself at times because I've been known to be too assertive...I'm not very good at playing the nice girl. But I did send off a little note telling her I'd decided to sever our dr-pt relationship, that her snide remark clearly indicated to me that she'd forgotten that *she* works for ME, as *I* am the one PAYING for the service.
Esp thx to Hybrid...you RAWK baby!!!

[Demokat]

There is appeal to authority, and there is appeal to logic and reason. Most people are utterly unresponsive to the former.

This is especially true in the US, unfortunately. A diet of TV and poor education has severely impacted our critical thinking skills. Once again, Hybrid, you hit the nail on the head!

[cs_carver]

So, OK, she had a bad moment. What else is going on with the two of you that one bad moment is enough to cut the ties? I'm guessing it might be something else--that you are really worried she's missing the diagnosis, or maybe you've outgrown the relationship, or you have something going on that triggers some of her buttons. Maybe her office is simply in the wrong part of town for the life you're living now. Dunno.

And apart from the snideness, is there anything that would make your proposed diagnosis inaccurate? That's one of the problems with internet medicine--we on the search engines tend NOT to have seen 100 cases this year already...

my best friend diagnosed her own skin cancer, with a lot of personal history and internet support. The biopsy came back positive for ringworm.

Good luck.

[Legeon]

It's important not to dictate what's wrong with you to your doctor, it's their job to find out. Yet asking a simple question or presenting an idea doesn't mean you deserve to get bitched out. I really have to wonder why she assumed you found these things through the internet, one of mine did the same thing. That's just idiotic to assume something like that and then get pissy over it.

[MermaidGir]

The diagnosis COULD be inaccurate, but then, I've had this prob for over a year and she's not really doing anything, I feel, to help me. We've had the tests etc but apparently she thinks it's OK to bleed for 5 weeks at a go (which I have, now). Whereas I am *DESPERATE* to resolve it.

[Nancy LC]

my best friend diagnosed her own skin cancer, with a lot of personal history and internet support. The biopsy came back positive for ringworm.

Good luck.
LOL! Well, we're certainly able to misdiagnose ourselves too. But I keep running into people who were very, very sick for many years and misdiagnosed for a long time, finally they do a little research themselves and they finally get a correct diagnosis. Doctors operate under the assumption that their patients don't know anything. That was true, once upon a time, when you had to go to special libraries to acquire the knowledge they have. Now I think they feel pretty threatened by that.

[cs_carver]

then, I've had this prob for over a year and she's not really doing anything, I feel, to help me. We've had the tests etc but apparently she thinks it's OK to bleed for 5 weeks at a go (which I have, now). Whereas I am *DESPERATE* to resolve it.

that's really more the problem than a particular instance of anything she said. You've lost trust in her, and it is time to go, or at the very least get a second opinion from someone with a different background.

I don't know anything about the problem, but it could well be that the treatment is either hysterectomy or that new cauterization thing, and I can't begin to wonder why a doctor would drag her feet on either, but that's all speculation.

The bigger problem, it seems, is that it is time to go. This incident is only the spark.

Are you done with childbearing and ready for a hysterectomy, if that's the answer? Different women approach that choice differently. Sounds like you are. Sounds possibly like she has a more conservative approach. I don't know any woman personally who regrets her hysterectomy, but we sure hear a lot of noise about how "doctors push them on women too much."

Good luck.

[amberdog]

The diagnosis COULD be inaccurate, but then, I've had this prob for over a year and she's not really doing anything, I feel, to help me. We've had the tests etc but apparently she thinks it's OK to bleed for 5 weeks at a go (which I have, now). Whereas I am *DESPERATE* to resolve it.


Sorry, I have had this problem as well when I take ANY form of birth control pill. It gets so old.

You have a two week random period, then it stops, one would think you are OK, and then BOOM! While out and wearing cream colored pants, another full on heavy period begins. Sigh. It's been like that for years.

One time I had my period the entire time I was supposed to NOT be menstruating, then the day I should have "got" my period, it ended!

What worked for me was going on the nuva ring by the way. It got my periods very regular.

[Nancy LC]

I'd tell her, "If you're going to have House's attitude, you also need House's expertise. Seeing as you are unable to diagnose me, you obviously lack the latter. Without the latter, I will not tolerate the former. I can handle a rude genius, and I can handle a congenial idiot. I refuse to tolerate a rude idiot, especially not with something as important as my body."
LOL! That's wonderful.

Doctors are scared shitless of the Internet. They've been the gatekeepers of knowledge for all time and now, anyone with a browser can read the same stuff they should know. Unfortunately most doctors get about 10 minutes per disease in school and they don't keep up on their reading. So anything that is learned after they get out of school, might as well not exist as far as they're concerned.

[dmrodz]

Ok, That "doctor problem" (it's what I call it) has happened to my husband and me before. I'm a molecular biologist and they usually are upset when you are or get informed and let them know of your opinions, so their defense mechanism for something they might have not considered before is to leash out and scream at you! I usually ask them to give me specifics on their diagnosis because I just need to know what they are considering to make the diagnosis!

I can't really tell what your diagnosis is as I'm no medical doctor.. If I were you, I would go and have a second opinion, and if you're not ok with the new Doc, then another opinion and so on.

You should also go and retrieve a copy of your record and ALWAYS carry it with you when you go to new doctors so they can see your Medical History. Be kind to them even if you want to kick them! I've had the experience of asking for a medical record and have the doc intstruct the nurse to charge me over $15 for it, and it should always be provided to you for free because it is yours after all. And insist that the doctor's annotations are included in the medical record and not just the lab results (just tell them you're moving or something so they won't think you're suing! LOL).

I changed doctors almost 5 times due to Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) that was affecting my Reactive Hypoglycemia. Turned out, the contraception pills I was diagnosed to decrease my cysts were in fact causing more cysts and hence I developed the PCOS. It wasn't until I stopped having the OCs that it all dissapeared and, with the aid of a diet, my Reactive Hypoglicemia stabilized!

Remember, Doctors are not gods. They are human, just like you and they make mistakes just like you! The difference between a doctor and you is that he knows a bit more about something and you know a bit more about something else! If both get informed, soon you'll both be good on both matters!

Good Luck! ;)

[PS Diva]

If you are suffering from really heavy periods, try googling (menorrhagia +vitamin A). I spent a lot of years with the problem, for which I was prescribed high doses of ibuprofen. That helped only a little. I tried vitamin A, and it helped me considerably! I can now lead a normal life. I found this solution on the internet...

At the very least I would ask to be seen by a different person in the practice. And if they want to know why, you tell them that not only has this person been unsympathetic, but unhelpful. And you need somebody who is willing to help you find the solution to your problem!

[HappyLC]

LOL! That's wonderful.

Doctors are scared shitless of the Internet. They've been the gatekeepers of knowledge for all time and now, anyone with a browser can read the same stuff they should know. Unfortunately most doctors get about 10 minutes per disease in school and they don't keep up on their reading. So anything that is learned after they get out of school, might as well not exist as far as they're concerned.

If a doctor is board certified, and wants to remain that way, he/she must participate in CME, continuing medical education, which involves exhaustive amounts of reading and regular testing.

While a few incompetent physicians may be scared of the internet, most doctors are just annoyed at having their time wasted by patients who come to them believing they have any and every disease under the sun, because they diagnosed themselves on the internet. How many times have you searched for a particular symptom and come up with cancer? I'd say it happens most of the time.

And then there are the pharmaceutical ads. You've heard the commercials..."Ask your doctor if you need (blank)." Well, they do. And most of the time the patient is not suffering from whatever disease the drug is for. Or there's a reason why (blank) drug is not appropriate for their condition.

Between the internet and drug commercials on tv, doctors are wasting a lot of valuable time with misdirected patients which could be better spent diagnosing and treating the patient's actual problem, with the medication they really need.

[Nancy LC]

hich involves exhaustive amounts of reading and regular testing.
LOL!
I actually registered at a web site as a doctor where you can earn CME credits by reading articles and taking a test at the end. I'd hardly call it exhaustive. I've earned a few credits myself. The tests were multiple choices and it seems like you can get all the answers wrong and still get the credit.

[HappyLC]

LOL!
I actually registered at a web site as a doctor where you can earn CME credits by reading articles and taking a test at the end. I'd hardly call it exhaustive. I've earned a few credits myself. The tests were multiple choices and it seems like you can get all the answers wrong and still get the credit.

Um....yeah.

[Nancy LC]

Here you go, try it out: http://www.medscape.com/home

[HappyLC]

Here you go, try it out: http://www.medscape.com/home


No thanks. I'm not comfortable with providing false information on the internet. I'll just take your word for it that CME is worthless and anyone with an internet connection is as knowledgeable as a board certified physician.

[deb34]

sounds like you uncovered an insecure doctor. Who knows, maybe she's got good reason to be insecure.


stands to reason, because only a few doctors graduate at the top of the class, we could get stuck with the ones who barely manage to graduate, at the bottom of the class....too bad they didn't have their medical school graduation ranking posted on the wall...kind of like restaurants in Ontario Canada must post a color coded pass (green sign posted), conditional pass(yellow) or a fail (red)=(closure). It would weed out the deadwood who hold peoples lives in their hands....

i'm sorry you had such a shocking experience especially from someone you had trusted.

[NessaM]

yeah i had an ablation in 2004 for long heavy bleeding. I'm not yet in perimenopause at 47 so it's annoying as all get out that i'm bleeding again. I just had the ultrasound and they said i might have adenomyosis but explained that the ONLY way to truly know is to perform a hysterectomy. I've been asking for one for 10 years and the doc won't do it.

But he is insanely respectful and treats me very much like a partner in my healthcare and has for over 15 years.... in fact, I was scheduled for a LEEP next month and called him and asked "as long as I"m unconscious, do you wanna dust while you're in there???" since I had started having some other issues since the procedure was scheduled. he laughed and said "yeah that's a good Idea and I'll look around too"

I'm so sorry your doctor was having a bad day and was rude to you. Seriously... if you have had an eight year good relationship with her and this iss the first time she was disrespectful and insulting, maybe it was a bad day? before you throw the baby out with the bathwater, maybe tell her "i don't like being spoken to the way you spoke to me the last time we talked" IF you can't treat me as a partner in caring for my body, maybe it's time we parted ways and I find a more responsive doctor"

[Nancy LC]

No thanks. I'm not comfortable with providing false information on the internet. I'll just take your word for it that CME is worthless and anyone with an internet connection is as knowledgeable as a board certified physician.
Nice, thanks for putting all kinds of words in my mouth. Why not stick the gettysburg address and "I had a dream" in there too. I would have loved to have said both, but I haven't.

[HappyLC]

Nice, thanks for putting all kinds of words in my mouth. Why not stick the gettysburg address and "I had a dream" in there too. I would have loved to have said both, but I haven't.

You already said it all yourself -

They've been the gatekeepers of knowledge for all time and now, anyone with a browser can read the same stuff they should know. Unfortunately most doctors get about 10 minutes per disease in school and they don't keep up on their reading. So anything that is learned after they get out of school, might as well not exist as far as they're concerned.

[Samantha22]

Can i just suggest...as a nurse....that the most important thing you can do is get a second opinion. Be proactive in your healthcare...if you don't feel your doc is doing enough or "finding the answer/solution"...then it is YOUR responsibility to find a doctor who will....perhaps she is just a frustrated as you? Is this a family doc or a gyn? Depending on your age...perhaps an ablation or treatments similar would solve the problem. Goodluck...don't take no for an answer...and don't accept something that you dont feel comfortable accepting as a solution.....get a second opinion. Hope you feel better!

[Karenemt]

A great book for any of us with "women's issues" is Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom by Dr. Christiane Northrup. I love this book :)

http://www.amazon.com/Womens-Bodies-Wisdom-Christiane-Northrup/dp/B000OUY8CC/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_k2a_2_txt?pf_rd_p=304485601&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-2&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0553379534&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=06W5PXDZG213GDCX9M83

[Citruskiss]

MermaidGir,

I can't believe that kind of comment, and I can certainly see why you'd want to find a new doctor. Wow, I'd be really uncomfortable with a doctor who said something like that to me.

I've had some health issues over the past year, and have looked up stuff as well, and one thing that's actually helped me is to ask my doctor (or more likely, my doctor's physician's assistant) why they think I have xyz, or why they don't think I have abc.

I've had very good luck with the physician's assistant, and not so much my own doctor. Last summer, I went in complaining of muscle spasms, and the doctor just gave me some heavy-duty pain medications and sent me on my way. I went back a few days later, and saw the PA - and she listened. Ran a bunch of tests, and it turned out to be an electrolyte imbalance. She helped me fix that, and sent me off to physiotherapy. No prescription pain medications required. I remember telling the doctor, "I think my electrolytes are out of whack" and he just dismissed the whole idea, and handed me a bunch of samples of the latest prescription du jour.

Not so with his assistant.

So, you just never know. I'd highly encourage you to find someone who'll listen to your concerns and run the proper tests. Furthermore, I'd look for someone who's willing to explain the 'why' or 'why not'. Someone who'll give you the actual numbers (from test results) and explain the normal ranges.

I've actually asked, "What makes you say that?" when being told I have a particular thing or other. And the assistant at my doctor's office is fabulous at explaining why she arrived at a particular diagnosis. She's also very good at listening to what I'm saying, and has no problem with me saying, "Oh, I read this and that, and I'm kind of concerned that maybe...." She'll actually follow up on this sort of thing, and if she doesn't feel it's necessary, she'll take the time to explain why. Most of the time though, she'll follow it up.

This is the kind of health care provider you want to find for yourself. Insist on someone who can say, "I've looked at this, this and this...and here's what I think" and so on. And more importantly - someone who'll listen to your concerns and ideas about what might be happening. A person who'll take you seriously and really check out the things you're mentioning.

Wishing you all the best in finding a decent health care provider. It can be done - they are out there.