View Full Version : How to let go in counseling

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Thu, Jun-26-03, 10:40
Hello all,
although I have not posted before, just wanted to let you know that reading your threads on depression is very helpful for me. Your own experiences on different types of AD medication is a great resource for me.

This leads me to my question. I just began counseling and am wondering if any of you are having a hard time expressing your feelings and thoughts to a specialist? In everyday life, I tend to over analyse every little situation and seem to have an explanation or solution for everything. However, when I get into counseling, it is like I freeze up and I don't know what to say. I usually tend to tear up and begin crying.

Any helpful suggestions on making the most of my time in counseling worthwhile.
thanks, Kaye

Thu, Jun-26-03, 11:39
Sounds like that's probably what you need to be doing.

Also sounds like you're analyzing the problem... which is part of the problem, maybe?

You're supposed to cry in therapy. That's part of why you go there, because you have a safe place to feel feelings you may have not been allowed to feel before.

Been there. Heart and head connector got way plugged up along the way; took a lot to unplug it but being clear about what I'm feeling, without having to analyze, makes like much more enjoyable.

Good luck.

Sat, Jul-12-03, 22:45
Yes, it's hard to "let go" in therapy. You're vulnerable. They're trained professionals & you wonder what they'll make out of whatever comes out of your mouth. The longer you do it, the easier it becomes. Some therapists are really good at giving you a "push" in the right directions; others just sit around & wait for you to talk. Different people react differently to those situations. I tend to just start gabbing until I hit something that the therapist picks up on. We then go from there; & yes, I'm usually a flood of tears by the time I leave & feel like crap when I get home.

Therapy is hard work. But, how successful it is depends on your chemistry with your therapist. You'll know sooner or later if it's going to work for you. Just relax before session & start talking about whatever comes to mind. It'll get easier & easier.


Tue, Jul-22-03, 21:23
I recently found a good therapist myself...of of the internet of all places... She's very very nice and empathetic....but I still wonder if shrinks can really help... I ready somewhere that most people who seek out therapist don't resolve their issues through therapy...but through self-help books.... Interesting...huh... Anway... I too just start talking...usually crying uncontrollably...but she makes me feel so much better... like I can make it through another day anyway!!! Prior to her most therapists were very cold and matter of fact... So if you find a good one, keep them... I usually think about my week on the drive to the therapist and decide what I want to talk about...it's usually something that stressed me out....something I didn't handle well, etc.

Fri, Aug-01-03, 21:44
I have been doing deep work in therapy for a number of years now.
I have been working with a wonderful therapist for the last several years.
I like myself more, I am emotionally stronger, I am recovering from my child hood.

Part of the process in therapy is learning to trust the therapist you are working with. This can take time, so give it awhile. If you eventually feel that your therapist is not a good match, find another one. I spend over a year with a therapist that was not a good match, and I kept thinking I was the problem, and I finally left and found another one. I am glad that I did.

Good luck on therapy. Sometimes you have to go to the bottom and rebuild before you can really become healthy. and not everyone has to go to the bottom, so don't despair.

I think as you develop trust with your therapist, you might find yourself able to let go. It may also be that over analyzing things is one of your defenses, one of the ways you keep yourself safe. Give it some time.

I know that I used crying as a defense. It took a long time to stop crying and let a good therapist in on what was really going on inside me.
Be nice to yourself and accept yourself for who you are and where you are, and eventually things will happen for you.