Is anyone else trying to encourage lower carb consumption for their children?

Mine are really young (both under 3), but I'm working to cut down on their starches, offering it much less frequently, maybe once a day if at all. I am really starting to buy into the sugar=poison notion, and I think that it's true for some people more than others. My family has a history of blood sugar issues and overweight.

Here's my biggest problem, though. We spend a lot of time with my husband's parents right now, mostly at their house for long weekends etc. And it's a constant fight with his mom about keeping the kids meals free of sugar and starches. What's worse, is that she'll offer them ice cream for desert.

Okay, I know you're probably thinking "she's just old fashion", but actually she's done South Beach, and she gave me Sugar Busters to read, she knows this stuff, she just chooses to ignore it because she can't stand the induction fog she goes into for a few days and would rather weigh 300lbs than do something about it. I'm so freaking frustrated. The other day on our way out to a movie I said the kids could have SF jello for desert, and she gave them ice cream. I specifically said "jello" when she said "I also have ice cream."

Anyone have any ideas or suggestions. I've talked to her several times about it, and spending less time with them isn't really an option right now.

We take a middle of the road approach. No wheat because my husband has celiac and no soda (this is new, because my mom loves to give them soda) but we do let them have full-fat sugared ice cream. I would rather them have that than anything SF, but it is a treat and not everyday. If they spent every day at my mother's I would get more strict and make more of their food to take (low-sugar homemade ice cream, etc.). With my inlaws we have the opposite problems - lots of scrutinizing of what they eat focused on low-fat.

Janine

I'm know I'll be having this probel with my MIL as well. My baby is almost a year old & my MIL acts like I'm trying to put my baby on a diet because I mostly feed her veggies & tells me I should be feeding her more dessert. And tells me my baby is under weight. It irritates the crap out of me. She is a small baby but I was a small baby as well & so was my brother. She weighs over 200 pounds & doesn't seem to care to lose weight. I believe if it was up to her the baby would be over weight. She seems to think being over weight is healthy. And I told her just because my baby is small it doesn't mean that I'm starving her so she'll be thin.

So I'm curiuos how others are dealing with this.

As a grandfather/father-in-law, I have never tried to tell my daughter or her husband how to raise their child. I have confidence that neither one would ever do anything to harm their child. I may not agree with everything that they do, but the choice is theirs. If they ask me for advice, I give it, but otherwise I keep my mouth shut.

I don't remember my parents or in-laws ever telling me how to raise my children. I'm sure they bit their tongues a few times keeping quite.

I think you'll have to confront her on this again and explain to her that she is showing you a lack of respect. Regardless of whether you are wrong or right in her eyes, she needs to follow your directions for your children. If she still continues to disrespect you, then you really should not allow her the opportunity to feed your children. That might mean staying away or taking them with you when you are over there and have to go out. I suspect just 2 or 3 times of doing that, and letting her know why you are not letting her keep the children, will nip it in the bud.

I wish I had known about lc when my daughter was young. I think it's great that you are giving them this head start on a healthy way of eating. Good luck!

If I am hearing you correctly, it is not the food, but rather, that your MIL does not respect your wishes. I have been in similar situations many times and all I can say is that it has helped tremendously when I fully explained how I felt. You might want to try to talk with her and tell her how it makes you feel when she disregards your wishes. Jill

yeah, we've been having that conversation since I had babies. We actually have a couple of topics that are off limits because she's been so rude as to say she basically thought I was killing her grandchildren with some of the choices I've made (I like to rely on both alternative and standard medicine, and she's not comfortable with anything alternative). Needless to say my children are thriving, beautiful and incredibly affectionate, hardly ever sick at all.

But the food thing is just so hard for me. She'll say she's doing south beach, and then help herself to an oversize desert. She thinks ice cream is an appropriate food for an 8 month old, even if it's not okay for her. And with the latest ice cream incident, she bragged to me it was low(er) fat, sugar free, as if that made a difference some how, when I'd already said "no". It's not so much that she tells me how to raise my kids, its that she undermines the dietary guidelines I'm trying to establish. The other night at dinner I gave them a small helping of mashed potatoes (because she'd made them just for the kids and I was trying to be polite). I told her I didn't want them to have a lot of potatoes While I was feeding the baby some bites, she gave my 2.5 year old another heaping spoonful of potatoes, when she hadn't even touched her meat or vegetables. I was so furious. Then I had to try to convince my toddler she couldn't eat the potatoes on her plate until she finished her veggies: that didn't really work! All this from a woman who KNOWS south beach, has read carbohydrate addicts, and sugar busters. A woman who herself is morbidly obese, and who has 2 daughters who are both overweight (though not as bad as she is) and a son who also has struggled with his weight. Obviously her method doesn't produce healthy results, I don't understand why she would want to disadvantage her grandchildren so!

Not visiting really isn't an option. My husband has been quite ill for several months now, and is on dissability. I am somewhat dependant on the help his parents give us, as is he on their support for him in this difficult time. I would seriously go crazy if it weren't for the time we spend there and I get a break.

Koalaty,
Your MIL sounds alot like mine. I wish I could be more of of help. I'm constantly bitting my tongue around her, out of respect for my husband. But when it comes to my baby then I have to do what's best for her. I want her to have a good start on healthy eating habits. She's like your MIL, she constantly complains about everyone being anerexic looking & then goes & eat a large bowl of ice cream & cake. I personally think she's jealous & think theirs no hope for her & wants everyone eles to be fat.

On the 4th , she wanted me to make fried potatoes, but I said I'm going to make something that I can eat besides the meat, so I made veggie salad & green beans. And then she brought over two cakes & said she brought over the strawberry short cake for me saying that "It's good for people on diets" so I just eat the strawberries & cream. Which I know that the strawberries were loaded with sugar.

Would it be any help to say "Our doctor says...." when it comes to food? I've often found that claiming any restrictions were under doctor's orders helped a lot.

Not my MIL she thinks she knows more then the Dr. And acts like he's the stupid.

My MIL is even better: when the doctor's advice supports her opinion, she waves it in your face like crazy. She has this bizarre idea that children (and mine are both under 3) should drink a quart of milk daily...some doctor told her that in 1975, and it's been gospel ever since. In spite of the fact that there have been numerous studies questioning the value of dairy as a source of calcium.

However, if I say my doctor told me something contrary to what she believes she'll say "well, they don't know all that much about nutrition." Which can actually be true, nutrition is a relatively small requirement in med school (15 total hours, not credit hours), but it's funny how sometimes they're the experts and sometimes they're not.

I just can't stand MILs sometimes...but she's better than my mother, so I guess I'll have to keep her.

Well that would explain why some DR are against Atkins diet. Then they tell you to stay away from breads , pasta, white rice & sweets to lose lose weight.

But my Inlaws are the same. They still believe the old low fat diet works & is healthier. And there's no telling them that it's all a big fat mistake.

Mine drive me crazy too. But they are always there when ever we need them. So I put up with them.

We take a middle of the road approach, too, at home. I try to teach my kids not that certain foods are bad or good, but to always ALWAYS stop eating when the tummy says it's full.

And at Nana's and Grammie's, my kids get to eat whatever they want. It may sound terrible, but it's not that often.

It sounds like you're at your in-laws more often, though, so I know that probably won't be agreeable to you. Good luck finding a balance that allows kids to be kids (there are some foods that just mean "childhood" to me and I'm not going to deprive my children of that) and keeping them healthy. It is hard.

I was hyper-diligent with the food and resented everything my mom and MIL tried to give them that was "against my wishes" for my first one, and I'm a lot more relaxed about it now.

What changed for me was once Mark's Mom and Dad, in VA, did something with my first, who was 6 months old that was "against my wishes." I told them about it in no uncertain terms. 3 days later Mark's father DIED of a massive heart attack.

Suddenly what they had done didn't seem so horrible, an my children's paternal grandfather, a very good man, was gone forever. And the next-to-last interaction with him was to tell them what to do and what I expected of them! Yikes. It's one of the moments in my life I deeply deeply regret.

Just sharing this with you to encourage you to keep things in perspective when it comes to your parents, your in-laws and your kids.

Wow that does put things into perspective.

I'm so sorry about your FIL.

I'm sorry too. But if you telling them how you felt would have been okay if he hadn't had a heart attack, then it's still okay to have said it even though he happened to die three days later. The heart attack wasn't your fault, and the message had to be given. It's just bad luck that he died right after, but it couldn't have been related to what you said. You stood up for your kids, which is great.