I don't know if this is the right forum for this but "In The Eyes of Others" got me thinking about my little girls. I have three beautiful little girls aged 6,4, and 2. I have always been fairly concious about what I say concerning my appearance (never complain about wanting to lose weight, etc) and the appearance of others mainly because I didn't want them to focus too much on their outward appearance. When we do talk about it I try and emphasize strong bodies, ya know, that daddy and I want girls who can kick butt, that kind of thing. My 6 year old and 2 year old are wonderful eaters (actually like lean meats and fruits - no veggies yet though) and otherwise seem very normal. My 4 year old on the other hand is very concerned with her appearance and eats very little and has no where near the energy of the other two. She isn't thin yet (all my babies were like little linebackers) bu I have even heard her make comments about her weight and "fat people" in general. Where is this coming from? Yes, I tell them they are beautiful but I also emphasize to them that they are smart, funny, caring, and extremely special.

I guess I want what every person wants: kids that grow up to be healthy, happy, and strong. I don't want them to have weight problems whether that be overweight or underweight. I think the pressure on young girls these days to be thin is stronger than ever and I want to be well-equipped to counter that pressure. Any thoughts?

sounds like you're a great ma! And it also sounds as if you're doing many of the right things.

Something I was told last year that really helped me is this: focus on what your body can DO, not on how it looks. To help that focus, I'd also take my daughters to women's sporting activities that are about performance (women's ice hockey, basketball, powerlifting, football, field hockey, soccer) and not equally about looks (as are gymnastics and figure skating). Have a university close by? The women's sporting events are sometimes free, even.

Also, maybe make a point to point out large and beautiful women on TV. Saying, "wow, isn't she gorgeous?" of a fat woman and meaning it can, I think, go some ways toward keeping that possibility open in young minds.

Have you ever read Reviving Ophelia -- a useful book to generate thinking and ideas for mothers of girls. Best of luck!

Thanks for starting this thread.

I am glad to see that some MoM's are conscious and working on this with their children. It's so important to instill these ideas when they are young.

I hope a lot more MoM's post cuz I'd love to hear from more of you. What about MoM's of boys?

Marlaine

I get Mode magazine which has beautiful pictures of full size women and I show them to my daughter. I do say things like "My that woman is beautiful" But most of all I tell her that all humans are beautiful and that artistically bodys are beautiful to draw. (I have drawings from an old art class.) I'm fortunate, she does have a good body image in her head. Now my problem is the fact she is worried about makeup and if she "has" to wear it. Oh my daughter is 14.
As for DeeSinn, My son was the same way at 4 about his body image. Unfortunately he was raised with the low fat diet Mother and now that I'm Atkins he's confused. He doesn't like meat (if you don't count hamburger and hot dogs)
He's 11 now and has a much better image of himself. He's trying to eat more meat but his such a carb junkie.
So just keep up what you are doing and they will be fine. Honest!

I have boys, Dee Sinn, and yes Marlaine, I wish I had instilled (or even known about ) this WOL while they were younger. Like Lessara, they were raised with the lo-fat parents. Now, my oldest (18) believes in fat free everything and I know that this will reach up to bite him in the behind when he's older. It doesn't help that hubby feels the same way as him. Neither of them care what I do.)

Younger son is 15 and trying to low-carb, as much as a 15 yr old can. The weekend stay-up-all-night-and-play-computer-games parties are killing him with their munchies. He's doing an admirable job though, considering.He's the one who would like to lose about 30#.

If I ever lose this weight and begin to look decent (am not weighing because I'm lifting weights, a turtle loser, and because it makes me NUTS), I'm hoping it will be a lesson to my kids to NOT be afraid of good fats and protein, and to worry more about the starchy , sugary stuff they put in their mouths.

YB

Isn't it fustrating when your partner doesn't believe in your diet and your kids think its too hard? I'm fortunate that my roommate is trying this out though he wonders if he can make it through the headaches (He's carb withdrawing big time!)

Lessara-- recently he's coming back around. He talks about how much better he felt when he tried this w/ me and was taking in protein regularly. I don't tell him what to do-- I feel his body is doing that for him. And I just feel VERY lucky that we just all eat what we want around here-- and that nobody puts down what I do. I hear some heartbreaking stories on this board about the FLAK that some people take for choosing this way of life. I have NEVER understood why what someone eats shoould be anybody's business. I feel for those people. Around here ever AM, it's just 'there goes mom, cookin her bacon!' and they smile- cause they know I feel better.

The kids will find their own way. My son's downstairs right now ( the younger one, who's LC-ing) and fixing himself some fish. He's home early from exams. Yestrday, he ate cereal and juice for breakfast, cause he was in a hurry. This AM he says to me " can I have some of your sausage, Mom, it helps me think longer during exams." See what I mean about them finding their own way? It may take yrs., but they will.

YB

With two impressionable daughters of my own, I have really enjoyed reading these posts! At 8 and 4, they're little sponges. I must be very confusing for them though. I was an active lowfatter while pregnant and nursing and i think i've passed the carbophile gene to both of them. My four-year old has the gut of an old man - all above the belt-line!

For a while I zoned and that was a good start, except I never had any energy. I feel much better on lower carbohydrates. But this is not a friendly world for low-carbers as it seems we've all experienced. Nevertheless, I stress protein and fats and try to set a good example (I'm not perfect though). Xmas just about killed me. But anyway, the point I want to make is that there was an article in the Globe recently that linked hyperinsulinism to breast cancer and when I showed it to my husband he became much more interested in the subject. I guess the reputable source gave it just enough credit.

I think this society targets girls and women especially for weight. I just hope that girls I don't end up giving them a neurosis. My problems began in childhood - I was overweight, dieted, became anorexic - the works! I probably screwed up my metabolism then. I am not "overweight" now, which makes me seem a bit fanatic about this wol. Only I know that I feel better and sharper without carbs, but there is nothing visible to attach to my reasons for this wol.

I really try to give them healthy foods but leave room for crap once in a while. I am considering taking us all to a sympathetic nutritionist to get an assessment and reinforce these ideas. Anyone know of one in the Toronto area?

Thanks to all!