I have in the past been a slave to the scale, weighing myself every single day, and then my day being ruined--leading to a binge--if it didn't show what I thought it should.
I quit weighing myself about a month ago after I cried when I saw it hadn't changed, and I knew I had to stop that.
Today, after a week on the SP, I decided to weigh myself. I told myself it was just for 'informational' purposes. I was really really hoping it would be down, even just a half-pound would have made my day, but I knew deep down it wouldn't be. It was the same, at 161.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed. But at least I didn't cry. I'd be lying if I said that 100% of the reason I'm doing this is for health and well-being. The truth is, I want to feel better and be healthy, but I also want to lose weight. I hate being fat with a passion that I cannot describe. But, I'm trying to look at it from a health perspective ALSO and not just a weight-loss perspective since I started SP. It's very hard. I'm trying to adopt DS's mantra..."You have to be healthy to lose weight, not lose weight to be healthy." This phrase has actually gotten me through this week!
Another perspective that I'm trying to adopt is that, well, at least I didn't GAIN! I proved to myself that I can eat 60g (actually more than that, b/c I haven't given up my sugar fix every day--so it's closer to 90 or 100g) a DAY of carbs that I had been trying to avoid like grains and starchy veggies and fruit and even (God forbid) sugar treats, along with my usual fats and proteins, and NOT gain weight, at least for a week, even with no exercise.
And that, I guess, is something to celebrate.
That, and the fact that I do feel so much better...2 reasons to celebrate.
And while I'm still struggling with whole being-fat-thing, I do feel good about my first week on the SP.
I decided to weigh myself.....
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