It has probably been about two years since I've been here. Lost a good amount, but -- of course -- gained it back. Things have a way of slowly creeping up on you when you don't remain ever vigilant. So, here I am, realizing that I DO need you guys in my life. Not that I didn't think that I did, but my little group of friends here sort of had life happen to them and ended up going their own ways, and we tried staying in touch off the board for a long time and that was great, but -- what with marriages and long-term relationships and other successes it just seemed like the board no longer was the place to be.

My life has had many wonderful turns and successes . . . a new home in a beachside resort and -- probably a place right ON the beach pretty soon. The hills are gorgeous right now. I have a fabulous dog. A lot of new and good friends in town . . . but, you know, there is something that makes a person miserable when they don't like their body.

Are you out there Amory Blaine? Missing you, Girl! How about you, Little Zu? Wonder how you're doing? Must go visiting on your pages.

Anyway, it is not healthy to be my weight at my height. I am not gargantuan. I should probably lose about 25 pounds. (AS soon as I have the courage to weigh, then I'll tell you how much, exactly, I need to lose).

But I need help getting out walking with my German Shepherd (who is wonderful about asking me to go out walking) and I have to learn how to like drinking enough water to actually DO it, and I have to get back in the habit of eating right for the low carb diet (20 gms of carbs a day or less) and I need to START with that, going into ketosis, and then staying there until I'm gradually ready to come out.

Glad this community is still here, intact, and determined as ever to be healthy! Many big hugs to you all and lots of good vibes!

Until tomorrow! --

Got to get motivated. What do I do? Reaching danger zone. Was going to post this week, but couldn't remember my password and kept entering to many guesses each time. Finally remembered it.

Cannot get motivated to stick with this 20 carbs or less-a-day program. I know how to do it. I like doing it. But I just see other foods I want and eat them. Went on a medical diet for a while -- at UCLA Risk Assesment Obesity Clinic. I am overweight by about 15 pounds or so, but not clinically obese. I need to lose weight to keep my blood pressure down. I need to do that to prevent a heart abnormality from getting worse. It could be a very dangerous abnormality. But I am in a slump and cannot seem to get motivated to come out of it through a correct eating program/WOL and exercise. Where is my energy and motivation? Why can't I rise to the occasion?

Got lots going on: trying to throw away, give away or sell 85 percent of what I own so I can sell my house and have to pare down to do that. Plus I cannot take most of my 'home' furniture with me to use at the beach house because that already is furnished. So deciding what I want is so hard. That, plus very involved in several community groups. Plus some emotionally draining issues (good ones, I guess, but difficult ones) with son. So, I'm always behind. Can't seem to get ahead of the game even though I lead a blessed life in many ways. Not sure what the secret is.

I guess part of the problem is that being so busy I'm inclined to eat up the rest of the Nutrisystem food that I ordered the last time I tried that diet, which was several months ago. I couldn't even do THAT properly. I wouldn't read the directions. I ate much more than I was supposed to eat. Just -- when it came to doing it-- engaged in self sabotage.

Am I afraid of looking too good again? I am letting the gray grow out (though it is a really pretty gray and I went to the hair stylish and she wove some other colors into it. I didn't want to have to keep doing my roots.)

I have not been into dating since I booted out my last boyfriend of 14 years. Just not interested. And yet, AM sort of interested, but not attracted to anyone my age, really. Am I hiding from men by being overweight and feeling ugly? (I'm still not ugly, but just not happy with myself. Feel very porky.)

I took off 15 pounds fairly easily at the UCLA clinic, but then Thanksgiving happened. I made it through just fine. But then Christmas and New Year's happened and I finally caved. I kept going to the program every Saturday, though, and did not gain anything back, but I had to miss a number of meetings because of an intense work project in which I was so involved that all I did was sit at my computer and work . . . and eat.

Still didn't gain because I was going as often as I could. But, one Saturday -- apparently -- was the day when they collect the money for the next month. My attendance had been irregular at best.

Then, all of a sudden, I saw that all my appointments had been erased from my computerized UCLA medical schedule. I guess they kicked me out.

So, I thought, "That's okay. I had great success with the Low Carb Forum. I don't need them anyway." It took me a while to get here. I cannot even bare to look to see how much I have gained back. I cannot gain any more back.

I have to get motivated. What do I do?

Hi and welcome back to the forum. I wasn't here before, but if you remember, this is a very supportive group.

I see your doing "Atkins variation." Sometimes it's the variations that get us in trouble. Sounds like you may need to get strict with yourself. Think?

If you want people to support you, a journal would be a good start. Putting all your posts in one basket, so to speak.

I hope to read your journal soon.

THANK YOU, BLUESINGER!!!

I now have two blue ladies who are my friends. I DO have a journal and you can go there by clicking my little green journal button.

You are right that the variations can be troublesome. I lost steadily on it before, though.

This time, it's more a matter of just getting motivated enough to start with the induction period. I am actually going to weigh myself today. . . and you have NO idea how much I resist that and am fighting with myself to do that.

Because in February,when UCLA dropped me, I had only 15 pounds to go. And I might have slipped all the way back to where I was last August in just two months!

Scared to death to weigh. Got to start, though.

Right now I'm double-posting (here and in my own journal) because, YES, this is THE BEST forum and everyone is extremely supportive and I do need to establish some friends again.

You guys help me stay committed and bring me back to the group. Your effect is to make me accountable. I can confess my sins here, and analyse them and determine why I do these self-destructive things.

It worked before.

So, so, so, so, so glad I found your note in my in-basket because I was on my way to another self-destructive day. Today is not yesterday and already I felt myself going on the wrong path.

So, I'm adding your post to my own journal (copying it in as reference), and elaborating a little more.

I tend to be quite long-winded. A lot of that is for ME (I tend to over-think things all the time), and I don't expect you all to read all that.... just put it down for me.

I try to keep the stuff for you all up top and the mental meandering garbage sort of is below a certain line.
---------------------- like this ------------------------
Last time I was here I think I had two journals. I changed my name when I came back. I had come to a position of note in the community and thought my original screen name would not have protected my identity sufficiently.

That journal was full of stuff I didn't want ANYONE to know, so before I left I cleaned it all up. See -- I've strayed so far from the point already.

headed over to your site now, Bluesinger! Want to know more about you singin' the blues. I like to sing, also.

Now I will post on my chart, also. XOXO

Good morning!
Progress so far: Not perfect on the induction phase yet, but down from countless carbs to under about 30, so that's a start. Hope to bring it down by at least 10 more today. And think I've lost half a pound.
First, the Bullet Coffee trick. I put in the 1 T of coconut oil first, then the stevia and pour the coffee (in my case, decaf) over it. Insert the stick blender and give it a whirl . . . then tilt the cup just a little until clearly, air is also being blended into the mixture. This prevents the coffee from gushing up and spilling all over the counter as I fizz it. Somehow the combination of air and infused coco oil makes it taste like coffee candy (if I've used a little Stevia). So, if you like coffee candy, you might try that. I ordered some adorable barrel-shaped (or wide-waisted) coffee colors -- each in a different bright color and they came in a set -- because I thought the narrowed mouth would prevent whizzing overflow. It didn't do much, actually, but the cups are cute. What prevents the overflow is NOT to whiz the oil from the top, but to stick the stick blender down to the bottom of the cup before turning it on, and then to slowly tilt the cup while blending to pull the oil and air down to the bottom and incorporate them into the coffee. So that's No. 1.

No. 2 is that if anyone likes fried pork rinds (cracklings, or chicharrones), you might also try chicken skin, which is easy to make. When I'm going to cook chicken of any type, I remove the skin and set it aside. While I'm cooking the rest of the chicken, a nuke the skin from 3.5 to 7 minutes, depending on how much I put into the microwave. If you check on it and it is not golden brown just yet, it isn't ready. Once it's the right color, dip it from you bowl with a broad or slotted spoon and let it rest on a paper towel until the oil drains out. There still will be plenty of oil left in the crispy skin -- which, to me is much more appetizing than soggy chicken skin. You either squish up the skin into crumbs (it is very brittle) and use it instead of bread crumbs or panko when you make fried chicken (helps to dry the chicken then dip into frothy egg before rolling in the chicken skin crumbs) -- or -- just eat the skin instead of potato chips. I love it that way. Most of the oil cooks out, but enough is left in there for us WOLers.

The ONLY PROBLEM I HAVE IS NOT KNOWING HOW TO CHART IT BECAUSE IT CANNOT BE CONSIDERED regular chicken skin and that is what the calorie sites -- such as Fat Secret -- measure when you enter in "chicken skin -- fried." Since we don't care too too much about calores, just carbs, I guess the main thing to think about is the carbs, here, but I doubt there are any. The recipes included in the calorie sites are for FRIED chicken skins in BATTER. But no batter is needed for these, so no flour, and, presumably no carbs since chicken meat, itself, has no carbs.

As I get better at accommodating myself to this new, old WOL, I will get better with the weight loss . . . I hope. There's one other concern, since I'm on a diuretic (for blood pressure issues) I think I'll need to start monitoring my blood pressure again. As I recall, eliminating most carbs has a diuretic effect and I'm finding myself getting extremely thirsty again -- and remembering~that I have to drink lots and lots of water on this WOL.

Welcome back MariAnne, yes if you are on a diuretic please monitor BP frequently. https://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb...-blood-pressure
While we don't count calories, calories do count. If you want to lose weight, taking in liquid oils (BPC) is not recommended since it by-passes satiety, nor is forcing the fat. https://lowcarbrn.wordpress.com/201...-force-the-fat/
Depending on your variation of Atkins, you may want to try to tap into fat from your body for the intro phase as in article above.
All the best,