Hi. I have noticed something, that has started in the last few weeks. I finally started loosing again, or at least building more muscle. I noticed because I now wear a firm size 8 instead of an 8 or 10. Anyway, lots of people have noticed because my flabby belly is getting flatter and flatter, and you can really see it when I tuck my shirts into my jeans. I was wearing a new pair of jeans yesterday, and I asked my husband if they looked good, and he just glanced at me and said "they look alright", well that sent me running into the bathroom to look in the mirror to see for myself.( I thought they looked very, very good) Well, I left the house to go to a baby shower, and I had to stop by the store for something small on the way, every guy in the place was getting whiplash looking at me, I felt so self conscious though because my husband told me that I looked "alright", why did he say that, when it is so obvious that I was looking really good then?? I was even feeling really good until he made that comment. I don't understand why the compliments can't come from him, if he knew all of the compliments that I get from other guys, maybe he might look at me different, then again maybe not. It means more to me when they come from him, but lately, I am thinking that he is a jerk, and I really like the compliments offered from others. Why is he pushing me away??

aww! I FEEL YOUR PAIN!
I also have a husband that doesn't notice my accomplishments unless the scale says so and in a dramatic way! It's nerve-racking because I can see how my clothes are getting loser when I'm strictly doing low carb, but he sees nothing. As you say, you'd like the compliments to come from your husband which is more important than from everyone else and when they don't it does make you feel like crap. Well gurrl.. do your thing and keep on keepin on! I've come to conclude that some people (including many of our husbands) don't realize (or care) how all of this makes us feel.


Take the compliments from others and relish in them. I, too, have been getting compliments from other men and better that than waiting for compliments that will never come from your husband. I've just gotten back on low carb a few weeks ago so these experiences were awhile ago, but I will feel the same way as I lose now. Keep your head up and know that YOU'RE making progress and you are not the only one who is noticing.. even if it isn't your husband.

I also feel your pain, my bf likes it when I'm off plan because he likes me heavier. I try to explain to him that although his opinion matters when it comes to my health and the way I feel about myself, being heavy is not an option. When I initially lost weight he kept telling me that I was too thin and would find fault in a lot of things (breast and arse shrinking) but now he's gotten used to the idea (I hope LOL) and doesn't make those comments anymore.

Give it time, he'll come around.

Or maybe he feels threatened in some way by your losing.

Have you told him that HIS compliments would mean more to you than any other in the world?

Before you throw the other guys' compliments in his face, ask yourself how YOU"d feel if he told you about other women complimenting him.

A LOT of women go through this. I bet a lot of men go through this too, when they lose a lot of weight and suddenly look a lot better. It's THREATENING to your partner, because it changes the balance of power within the relationship. They generally DO come around, usually when all THEIR friends start noticing that their partner has become a hotty. Until then, be prepared for sulking. It's unfortunate, but it's human nature.

And enjoy the whiplash

Thanks for the feedback, and he always makes comments about how much smaller my "boobs" are now. I do relish the compliments from others, as a matter of fact, I think that they really have helped my self esteem, I would never throw up the fact that other men are complimenting me, I think that it might make matters worse. My husband is severly overweight, and couldn't stick to this wol. Maybe that has something to do with it too. We started at the same time, and he has lost nothing because he couldn't stick to it. I am thinking that maybe he looks at me, and thinks that if he could do it, he would have lost a lot too!!!

Or maybe he just said you look "alright" because he was afraid of falling into a trap... like "do these make my butt look big?" Men can't always read our minds and KNOW what we want to hear... and their idea of a compliment isn't always terms WE think a compliment should be put in.

Just a thought.

Men... what can I say. DH is low carbing with me FOR NOW and I hope he continues, cause I see us going through this too.

I just saw this and I only have like a split-second to post b/c I'm coming up to deadline here at work (those b*stards, how dare they make me work instead of checking out the internet), so I haven't read any of the answers but...is it possible your husband is a little scared b/c you really do look so good? Is he more comfortable when guys AREN'T checking you out? I think that's often the natural reaction of SO's. He might just be afraid. You've changed this, what will you change next...KWIM? Just a thought!

Hmmmmm....husband is severely overweight. Used to have fat wife. Now has hot wife....what could be going on in his male mind?
You know this man better than anyone. But I think he must be panicking because he knows what other men are like, and he must know that you are getting ogled whenever you go out.
And maybe he figures you'll "trade up" for a slimmer model.
Unless he's one of those guys who just don't realize that they are overweight. But you said he's tried this WOL and can't stick to it, so I guess he realizes he should lose weight.
IMHO, I think he must be really insecure right now, and hoping you haven't noticed what a fox you've become.

I agree with everything said. I haven't posted any weight loss since I joined, because I haven't weighed, but just today I wore a pair of pants that kept slipping down and I kept having to pull them up...such great evidence that I've lost more than five pounds now!

Anyhow, I mentioned this to my dh and he just say...Oh, uh huh. I'm like..."Thanks for the encouragement." He then said, "No, I didn't mean I wasn't happy for you...I am! Really!"

Sometimes guys just don't SAY things the way we would, it goes right over their heads...that's just men, but I agree that if your dh is overweight, he may be threatened by the new you.

The only advice I have is to talk to him about it, openly and honestly. He may very well be scared that you'll trade up, as someone else said.

Meanwhile, don't let it discourage you, you're doing great!!! Keep it up!!!

Nonnie

Nothing tastes a good as being thin feels-
are you following Gullos' diet and does it work for yoU?do you Box In/Box OUt and have you eliminated trigger foods or learned to moderate them?

what is Gullo plan?? I just low carb. I do eat too few carbs though. I do induction levels, then more then lower then more, and I am not loosing much anymore, but I am still wearing the size 8 or 10 jeans that I fought to get into. I would like to get "slimmer", but my sister tells me that I look like a beginning body builder, that I am stocky, and I do have some muscle definition coming out. I told my kids and husband that all I want for Christmas is a Gym Membership!!! Wonder if I will get it??????

This is exactly what I was going to say...I really think it's one of the two and most likely just that he doesn't "get" that he needs to be a little more sensitive...believe me, I've been there and the only way is to tell him!

Good Luck....you have done soooo well. And don't feel badly about lapping up the compliments from other men and women!

Cath

You are doing great! A size 8 is great.

Men truly do not understand how much we enjoy heart-felt compliments.

When I lost 35 lbs. after Dh and I got married, he hardly ever said I looked better, or how I did a good job, but I found out through friends that he was talking my weight loss up to them. Why? I have no clue...just goes to show they DHs) notice, but do not always feel the need to tell us. LoL.

He could also feel like other men are going to be falling all over themselves when they see you and that in turn, could make him feel threatened.

Whatever the case, please do not let it get you down. Keep on staying fit and trim!