Active Low-Carber Forums
Atkins diet and low carb discussion provided free for information only, not as medical advice.
Home Plans Tips Recipes Tools Stories Studies Products
Active Low-Carber Forums
A sugar-free zone


Welcome to the Active Low-Carber Forums.
Support for Atkins diet, Protein Power, Neanderthin (Paleo Diet), CAD/CALP, Dr. Bernstein Diabetes Solution and any other healthy low-carb diet or plan, all are welcome in our lowcarb community. Forget starvation and fad diets -- join the healthy eating crowd! You may register by clicking here, it's free!

Go Back   Active Low-Carber Forums > Our Website > Comments Box and Technical Questions
User Name
Password
FAQ Members Calendar Search Gallery My P.L.A.N. Survey


Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1   ^
Old Sun, Nov-11-01, 11:55
alto alto is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 2,171
 
Plan: Protein Power
Stats: 296/278/179 Female  5'8
BF:
Progress: 15%
Location:
Default Suggestion re posting in other people's journals

I have a suggestion that I hope won't offend anyone, but I've noticed that there are a lot of entries in people's Journals that are encouragements from other members ''you're doing great" type posts. While these are wonderful to get, I'm afraid that in three months, our journals will be 1/4 journal and 3/4 encouragement. Could I suggest that if a someone wants to send a pat on the back or a suggestion that it be done by PMs instead of posting? I don't mean the Mentor's or Moderators posts, or if someone has a really substantive suggestion, but the more chat type posts.

I don't mean this as a criticism of anybody, please. I've been doing the same thing myself before I realized the long-term effect it could have.
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #2   ^
Old Sun, Nov-11-01, 12:56
doreen T's Avatar
doreen T doreen T is offline
Forum Founder
Posts: 37,229
 
Plan: LC paleo
Stats: 241/188/140 Female 165 cm
BF:
Progress: 52%
Location: Eastern ON, Canada
Smile

I understand what you're saying, and it's not offending . It's just that support and encouragement is the whole purpose of our membership community.

The Bootcamp journals were created for the purpose of members to share their experiences, menus, thoughts, problems etc ... and to receive encouragement and feedback from others. Not just the moderators, but from everybody. Most folks WANT this feedback ... in fact, some members have posted they feel discouraged because nobody else but the moderator has ever read or made a comment in their journal. Many folks love to read other members' journals too ... and reading about THEIR success, and reading the congratulations and WooHooo! comments is really motivating. If those comments were only ever made privately, no one would see them, no one could share.

The private message system is intended for brief messages, perhaps to exchange email addresses, or administrative concerns. From a technical point of view, the PM's use up a LOT of server space, (which the webmaster has to pay for) and only one person will see it, instead of being shared by many.

Another problem with PM's .. you have to keep your boxes cleared out, as there is a limit of 10 messages ... including your SENT folder. Those encouraging words of support and advice will be permanently in the journal, and can often inspire at a later date, when you're going through a rough spot.

My turn to say, "hope I'm not offending" ... but, if someone is posting menus, etc, and only wants to have the "experts" reply with analyses and advice, then it's not really support, it's a consultation .. just my 2¢ though.

Doreen
Reply With Quote
  #3   ^
Old Sun, Nov-11-01, 13:15
alto alto is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 2,171
 
Plan: Protein Power
Stats: 296/278/179 Female  5'8
BF:
Progress: 15%
Location:
Default

Doreen, I'm not offended at all It's just a matter of personal preference, I'm sure -- I'm a hermit

I understand your reasoning, and it makes perfect sense. I like to read the encouraging messages too -- and I like to give them -- I guess I just wish they could go away in the morning I certainly didn't want to stir up anything, though, and I'll withdraw the suggestion
Reply With Quote
  #4   ^
Old Sun, Nov-11-01, 13:35
Karen's Avatar
Karen Karen is offline
Forum Founder
Posts: 12,775
 
Plan: Ketogenic
Stats: -/-/- Female 5 feet 4 inches
BF:
Progress: 100%
Location: Vancouver
Default

I know what you mean alto, and these are my thoughts on it...

Just by virtue of posting in a public forum, there will be feedback and comments - some annoying, silly, insightful, great, repititious, funny, explosive.... Some people don't need the "WTG" stuff and some love to give it because that's how they get their support. Some need it, and they will find it here, because there are others who are willing to give it. Some only want the meat and disregard the "fluff".

Just like in a physical community, different personalities and behaviours come through. While we strive to keep the forums free of flames, slagging and name calling as well as keeping posts in the right place, that's about it. If you start creating too many public rules, you'll have a dictatorship that no one will be comfortable in and the community will leave for friendlier places.

Quote:
I've been doing the same thing myself before I realized the long-term effect it could have.


It will help the community grow. There are lots of lurkers as well as active posters who may experience what one person deems insignificant as profound. 'Ya never know!

Karen
Reply With Quote
  #5   ^
Old Sun, Nov-11-01, 20:18
Andy Davies Andy Davies is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,212
 
Plan: My own (based on a compil
Stats: 333/260/224 Male 73 ins
BF:
Progress: 67%
Location: Hampshire, England
Default

Hi all.

Alto, I've felt a bit the same in the past. Gradually, though, I have come round to see it as Doreen and Karen do. It may be that for me the difference came when I started thinking of this forum as a kind of family. I have a family of my own, so it's an easy analogy for me to relate to, but to give some perspective of what I mean by it so that you can understand it, I have children who sometimes drive me mad with their childish twittering. But I still have to continue communicating with them and inspiring them and making them think. And you know, this forum is not so very different. One way in which you can effectively change the behaviour of others is by example. I do it at home. I do it here, though not always as consciously (i.e. deliberately). The crux of it is that you never know which of your words will help, support, inspire (or conversely, offend) someone, so all you can do is offer such words of encouragement as you feel comfortable and genuine about giving. Having done that, you have to accept that many people will accept what suits or seems right for them, and disregard what does not apply. But - and this is the nub of it - you are not just writing for one person, whoever you address your remarks to. Someone else may feel exactly the same way you do, and never even let you know they have seen the message. You may inspire or motivate someone you don't even know about, or give that little explanation which finally helps a person to understand something 3 months after you wrote it. so I for one am in favour of posting everything publicly. As for the main gist of your message, that shallow messages of encouragement are rather fatuous, and take up unnecessary space, there comes a time when you welcome even the shallowest message. I did not think, 9 months ago when I joined this forum, that I would ever say that. But I now realise that each of us sometimes go through patches when the familiarand encouraging - and yes even the silly - remarks you get from this supporting LC family do make a difference. If you do not yet feel this way, I say be patient, you may yet have cause to be grateful to someone for their support. And maybe we should bear one more thing in mind. We are lucky, because we are articulate. Others may not all have such a range of communication skills as we do, but still want to convey their genuine feelings of concern or exultation. And I am not going to say they have any the less right to do so. Hope this does not sound too much like a lecture, it is not meant to. But it's late at night here, and I'm tired. In such situations, I have been known to come over as more abrupt or hectoring than I mean to, and if this applies now, then please forgive me for it. I'm off to my bed, and it's very overdue!

Best wishes,

Andy
Reply With Quote
  #6   ^
Old Sun, Nov-11-01, 21:37
alto alto is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 2,171
 
Plan: Protein Power
Stats: 296/278/179 Female  5'8
BF:
Progress: 15%
Location:
Default

Gee, I wonder which part of that message was NOT a lecture, Andy ? (that's a rhetorical question) I do wish to say, lest there be a larger misunderstanding, that the gist of my original message was not "that shallow messages of encouragement are rather fatuous." I would not want the people on this board who are so encouraging and generous to think that.

I also said that I withdraw the suggestion.

Karen, your reasoning makes perfect sense. Thanks for the response.

Last edited by alto : Sun, Nov-11-01 at 21:52.
Reply With Quote
  #7   ^
Old Mon, Nov-12-01, 06:52
Andy Davies Andy Davies is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,212
 
Plan: My own (based on a compil
Stats: 333/260/224 Male 73 ins
BF:
Progress: 67%
Location: Hampshire, England
Default

Alto, sorry if my remarks offended you. Yes, Karen had the balance just about right, and summed things up perfectly. I'll follow your example, and withdraw my entire post.

Best wishes,

Andy
Reply With Quote
  #8   ^
Old Mon, Nov-12-01, 08:40
LC Sponge LC Sponge is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 1,160
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: //2002
BF:and feeling great
Progress: 99%
Location: Ontario, along the Rideau
Default

It's good to air these things A serious discussion should never be apologized for. Everything on this thread was stated with obvious respect and should be accepted as such. Nobody needs to delete anything IMO.

At first I was as apprehensive about going into somebody elses journal as I would be walking into their house and yelling *Hi honey! I'm home* without so much as knocking.

I was surprised when the first person posted in my journal. But like all new cultural influences, I realized that the net in general, and this board in particular isn't much like anybody's home, more of a *club house*.

And in a club house, I would expect that any member could walk into any room at any time, and looking at if from that perspective made it ok for me.

Too bad we can't delete any message in our own journal , but I'm sure the technology can't flex to that specific an authorization, without letting us delete any post in any thread . I'm sure some day, it'll come. .

PS one point tho - sometimes really good discussions get going or good questions are asked in a journal from which the whole membershp would get benefit. I've known Wa'il to be able to disentangle such a thread and start a new one somehow.... That's a GOOD thing.
Reply With Quote
  #9   ^
Old Mon, Jun-21-04, 14:48
LisaAC's Avatar
LisaAC LisaAC is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 814
 
Plan: Mostly General
Stats: 235/235/170 Female 5 ft 4
BF:
Progress: 0%
Location: Blacksburg, Virginia
Default

For me, unless I want to get critiqued about what I ate, I don't make a public journal here. I go somewhere else where I can post my journal privately. For some people though, the open journal is the way to go but you always run the risk of someone trying to rain on the parade, so to speak A lot of people are fairly sensitive when it comes to dieting and sometimes something can come off as negative, even when not meant to. Now, if you're fairly insecure, like I can be sometimes, that alone can send you spiraling downward dietwise and you end up off the track. Then you find it difficult to get back on for about a week or two. I've had that happen as well.

But as for me, I don't have the support of family or friends, it's just me.

There are many places online to find a free online journal. Most have the option to keep it private or make it public. Anyways, here's one.
http://www.my-diary.org
Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Suggestion -- post indicators Coriolis Comments Box and Technical Questions 5 Fri, May-23-03 21:54
Suggestion: Finding Other Members PJ in Miam Comments Box and Technical Questions 1 Wed, May-21-03 19:09
New feature added: Links to journals tamarian General Low-Carb 1 Fri, Feb-15-02 18:59


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 19:56.


Copyright © 2000-2024 Active Low-Carber Forums @ forum.lowcarber.org
Powered by: vBulletin, Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.