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  #1   ^
Old Thu, Feb-03-11, 22:20
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default Maintainers: Do you have spouse and/or children that do not eat lc?

I've been to goal and maintained for awhile....but obviously not permanently. I'm trying to understand why...and thus have questions. If you are a maintainer...do you <live> with other people who do NOT eat lc - spouse, so, room mate, children?

If so, how have you come to a place where you could prepare/smell/be in the same room with foods that are not on plan <long term> without being tempted to take a bite?

How have you over come the repeated comments that it won't hurt to eat it just this once?

I think in the past I've gotten to a place of comfort and complacency with lc and allowed family members to wear me down and talk me into eating a bit here and there....HOW do you over come that???

If it was just me here it'd be no problem staying lc...but that's not how it is (thank God! - love my dh and dc). I have to figure out how to do this with the temptations in the house.

Thanks SO much for any advice!!!
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  #2   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 15:01
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

I've been reading the maintenance threads and discovered in one of them that apparently I'm not supposed to be posting in this forum since I'm not officially in pre-maintenance. My apologies....just thought this was the best place to go to get a response from long-term maintainers.
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  #3   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 20:55
GlendaRC's Avatar
GlendaRC GlendaRC is offline
Posts: 8,787
 
Plan: Atkins maintenance
Stats: 170/120/130 Female 65 inches & shrinking
BF:
Progress: 125%
Location: Victoria, BC Canada
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by freckles
I've been reading the maintenance threads and discovered in one of them that apparently I'm not supposed to be posting in this forum since I'm not officially in pre-maintenance. My apologies....just thought this was the best place to go to get a response from long-term maintainers.

Are you sure about that? I know the weigh-in thread has that rule, but I sure didn't realize that the rest of this area has that rule too? Seems to me, that as we get closer to the maintenance stage, we have more and more questions - as you do - and who better to ask them of than the maintainers!??
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  #4   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 21:11
GlendaRC's Avatar
GlendaRC GlendaRC is offline
Posts: 8,787
 
Plan: Atkins maintenance
Stats: 170/120/130 Female 65 inches & shrinking
BF:
Progress: 125%
Location: Victoria, BC Canada
Default

And no, I don't live with anyone not on the same plan, although he doesn't always act as if he knows that! He follows mouth hunger rather than real hunger and he eats fast so I'm sure he doesn't feel satisfaction until long after it happens.

Anyway, he doesn't cook so he eats what I make and I refuse to make two meals. I know this is a very healthy way to eat, so if he wants to eat less healthy stuff, he has to buy it and cook it himself (not gonna happen!) For children in the household, I really don't think there's any reason to teach them to expect carby or starchy foods at meal times, but I sure don't have an answer for how to teach them to eat the right things at school provided meals. Our schools didn't provide meals when my kids were that age. That's got to be a huge problem.

Anyway, I don't believe there's any health reason to feed the non-low carbers any differently than you eat yourself ... this is a perfectly natural and healthy life-style. For treats, check up on the "sweet treats" section of the kitchen and recipes area. Loads of good stuff there that are really kid-friendly ... even husband-friendly!!
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  #5   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 21:13
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by GlendaRC
Are you sure about that? I know the weigh-in thread has that rule, but I sure didn't realize that the rest of this area has that rule too? Seems to me, that as we get closer to the maintenance stage, we have more and more questions - as you do - and who better to ask them of than the maintainers!??


The post I'm referring to specifically pointed out that the pre/maintenance forum was for those that were within 5-10 lbs. of goal, but the weigh-in thread was for those that were at 90% of goal. Not a big deal....just didn't want to be over-stepping or offending.
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  #6   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 21:55
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by GlendaRC
And no, I don't live with anyone not on the same plan, although he doesn't always act as if he knows that! He follows mouth hunger rather than real hunger and he eats fast so I'm sure he doesn't feel satisfaction until long after it happens.

Anyway, he doesn't cook so he eats what I make and I refuse to make two meals. I know this is a very healthy way to eat, so if he wants to eat less healthy stuff, he has to buy it and cook it himself (not gonna happen!) For children in the household, I really don't think there's any reason to teach them to expect carby or starchy foods at meal times, but I sure don't have an answer for how to teach them to eat the right things at school provided meals. Our schools didn't provide meals when my kids were that age. That's got to be a huge problem.

Anyway, I don't believe there's any health reason to feed the non-low carbers any differently than you eat yourself ... this is a perfectly natural and healthy life-style. For treats, check up on the "sweet treats" section of the kitchen and recipes area. Loads of good stuff there that are really kid-friendly ... even husband-friendly!!


Well...the downside is that my children at home are late teens, so they are pretty well set in their ways. The upside is that we homeschool and I do the grocery shopping. Basically everyone eats what I buy for the most part.

But, yeah..dh is also set in his ways. Even though he depends on my shopping and our cooking, he still expects some carb items for the most part. He's Italian and loves bread and pasta (and yes, potatoes). We go too long without those sides and he starts complaining.

It's weird...he knows I do good on lc (less moodiness/depression) and supports it on the one hand, but then on the other he tells me there's no reason I shouldn't be able to have hc stuff some times. He's always the first to say that there's no reason for me to have just one bite, one serving, etc. But he's also the first to be glad when I get back to lc.

And dh influences the way dc eat (even though he complains incessantly about youngest ds weight - which is off the charts)...so there's always some sort of temptation here.

Bottom line is that dh is sold on the SAD low fat, low cal diet - even though he has seen over YEARS that I am healthier on low carb high fat. He calls me his white lilly (I have other unusual health issues).....I need special care, so it doesn't really apply to anyone else. It is FRUSTRATING to say the least - especially since he's had bad test results that he thinks he should fix with meds and low fat/low calorie.

Ultimately it comes down to the fact that I can only control my dh and dc food to a certain extent...but their food is still in my house and how do I handle the temptation and the prompts that it's okay to have them "sometimes?" Guess it's just a mental thing I'm going to have to figure out. <sigh>
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  #7   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 22:12
Nancy LC's Avatar
Nancy LC Nancy LC is offline
Experimenter
Posts: 25,843
 
Plan: DDF
Stats: 202/185.4/179 Female 67
BF:
Progress: 72%
Location: San Diego, CA
Default

If it were me, I'd make sure I have compensatory things on hand. If I'm feeling well-treated, I'm unlikely to stray. So, perhaps make yourself an LC cheesecake and know you can grab a piece from the freezer should you feel the need to stray. Better to stray ON plan that off it. Ya know?
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  #8   ^
Old Fri, Feb-04-11, 23:36
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nancy LC
If it were me, I'd make sure I have compensatory things on hand. If I'm feeling well-treated, I'm unlikely to stray. So, perhaps make yourself an LC cheesecake and know you can grab a piece from the freezer should you feel the need to stray. Better to stray ON plan that off it. Ya know?


I think that is what saved me from the fresh-baked brownies yesterday...I knew I had lc cheesecake and candies in the freezer. I didn't have to go for them...but I KNEW they were there. Just scared/worried about living this way long term. Brownies..tortillas...pancakes....chips....I know I can resist short term....just not sure how I can do long term. I'm scared about it and was hoping to get some advice from others who have this in their own house.
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  #9   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 08:55
Nancy LC's Avatar
Nancy LC Nancy LC is offline
Experimenter
Posts: 25,843
 
Plan: DDF
Stats: 202/185.4/179 Female 67
BF:
Progress: 72%
Location: San Diego, CA
Default

Could you wean your family onto low carb treats? There are low carb brownies, cookies, almost everything. The big exception is salty/crunchy stuff like chips, but perhaps they'd take to nuts?

I grew up in a family where Mom was pretty tyrannical about the food we had in the house, so I'd probably follow in her footsteps if it were up to me. As we grew older we knew we could get our crap-food outside the house, but inside... nope. I think we knew from an early age that Mom was pretty iron-willed about such things and those battles weren't going to be won.
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  #10   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 11:11
cnmLisa's Avatar
cnmLisa cnmLisa is offline
Every day is day one
Posts: 7,776
 
Plan: AtkinsMaintenance/IF
Stats: 185/145/155 Female 5'5
BF:
Progress: 133%
Location: Oregon Coast
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by GlendaRC
Seems to me, that as we get closer to the maintenance stage, we have more and more questions - as you do - and who better to ask them of than the maintainers!??



Quote:

If it were me, I'd make sure I have compensatory things on hand. If I'm feeling well-treated, I'm unlikely to stray. So, perhaps make yourself an LC cheesecake and know you can grab a piece from the freezer should you feel the need to stray. Better to stray ON plan that off it. Ya know?


^^^^^this in spades

Luckily, I live alone (Ollie doesn't count) so don't have the daily struggles of dealing with food in the house that doesn't meet my criteria and children/spouse that doesn't eat LC. But I wil say this. You really have to ask yourself what is most important to you. There are always going to be events, co-workers, trips, family members, kids, etc. You either begin to learn to say no with conviction, or you cave and end up back where you were. Both are hard--saying no and the guilt and weight gain associated with caving--it's all hard, you just pick your hard. For me, it's much easier to say no than lose 50 pounds (that sucked!)

Progress not perfection.

Lisa
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  #11   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 15:55
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nancy LC
Could you wean your family onto low carb treats? There are low carb brownies, cookies, almost everything. The big exception is salty/crunchy stuff like chips, but perhaps they'd take to nuts.


I have tried that over the years and it has never gone over very well. Youngest ds likes them, but dh and oldest ds wont go for it. I wish I could get everyone onto lc. I think all of us would benefit. The biggest hurdle is that dh is Italian and a HUGE pasta/bread man. Fortunately, for the most part, I can do without them. Spaghetti squash is far superior to spaghetti noodles IMO.

Quote:
Originally Posted by cnmLisa
You really have to ask yourself what is most important to you. There are always going to be events, co-workers, trips, family members, kids, etc. You either begin to learn to say no with conviction, or you cave and end up back where you were. Both are hard--saying no and the guilt and weight gain associated with caving--it's all hard, you just pick your hard. For me, it's much easier to say no than lose 50 pounds (that sucked!)


This is some good advice. I guess I just got kind of freaked out about my reaction to the brownies....how it was an almost mindless grab a bite kind of situation - like the smell almost hypnotized me into eating it.

There is some hc junk in the house right now that I would not normally have here (like that brownie mix). I just went completely off the wagon and made some stupid purchases. It will take some time for them to be eaten by the guys and then it won't be as bad.

I can do this. I guess I'm to a point where I have to choose - every time - and not get sucked into thinking a bit here and there is okay. That thinking is what derailed me in the past and I don't want to ever go back to having the yucky symptoms. Fact is, if I don't stick with it I WILL end up with diabetes. If I could keep that in my head I think it would make a difference.

Thanks for the advice, lady's. I'm finding it curious that no one with non-lc family members has responded. Is there not any long-term maintainers that have non-lc family living with them? If not, I suppose I could use me being the first on the forums to do so as extra motivation.
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  #12   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 16:03
cnmLisa's Avatar
cnmLisa cnmLisa is offline
Every day is day one
Posts: 7,776
 
Plan: AtkinsMaintenance/IF
Stats: 185/145/155 Female 5'5
BF:
Progress: 133%
Location: Oregon Coast
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by freckles

I can do this. I guess I'm to a point where I have to choose - every time - and not get sucked into thinking a bit here and there is okay. That thinking is what derailed me in the past and I don't want to ever go back to having the yucky symptoms. Fact is, if I don't stick with it I WILL end up with diabetes. If I could keep that in my head I think it would make a difference.

This I think is where many have derailed-- a bite here, a bite there, turns into a meal here a meal there, turns into a day here and a day there, turns into a week here a week there, turns into a year and there you are back to day zero.

Every day, every meal, every bite, every choice is day one. Don't lull yourself into thinking that it's not because the minute you do is the minute you're back to 50 pounds overweight or straddling the fence to diabetes. Once you accept that your metabolism is not like everybody elses, it get's easier. I look upon it as an illness, and I have found a way to control my illness without medication.

It's good that you're thinking about these things now--because once you have a game plan in place, your chances in maintenace just got that much higher.

Progress not perfection.

Lisa
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  #13   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 20:14
Kristine's Avatar
Kristine Kristine is offline
Forum Moderator
Posts: 25,582
 
Plan: Primal/P:E
Stats: 171/146/150 Female 5'7"
BF:
Progress: 119%
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Default

Freckles, you are fine posting this thread in this forum. It's not an elite little tree fort for snobby kids at maintenance.

My DH is vegetarian, so yes, I have challenges at meal time. He also understands that I have to eat a certain way. He's also mercifully disinterested in what I eat. Your DH shouldn't care what you do or don't eat. You should try to get it through to him that it hurts you emotionally and physically when he tries to derail you. If he can't be your biggest cheerleader, he should at least agree to disagree and drop it.

Two things make it easy for me to handle his carby side dishes: one is the fact that gluten makes me so sick now. I honestly treat gluten the same way I treat raw meat: even washing my hands after I handle it, not contaminating my food with utensils that have touched gluten side dishes, etc. There are cookies in the pantry and I couldn't care less. The other thing is realizing that I can handle small amounts of starches without getting cravings. I like to have maybe 1/4 cup of rice or maybe 1/4 of his potato.

I do all of the shopping and he eats what I buy. If he wants carby junk, he can buy it at work.

Good luck...
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  #14   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 21:05
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by cnmLisa

It's good that you're thinking about these things now--because once you have a game plan in place, your chances in maintenace just got that much higher.



Too bad I didn't think about these things the first two times around...I'd just be enjoying maintenance.
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  #15   ^
Old Sat, Feb-05-11, 21:21
freckles's Avatar
freckles freckles is offline
Senior Member
Posts: 8,730
 
Plan: Atkins Maintenance
Stats: 213/141/150 Female 5'4 1/2"
BF:
Progress: 114%
Location: Dallas, TX
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kristine
Your DH shouldn't care what you do or don't eat. You should try to get it through to him that it hurts you emotionally and physically when he tries to derail you. If he can't be your biggest cheerleader, he should at least agree to disagree and drop it.


I think dh just feels bad that I can't/won't eat certain things. He's kind of a moderate person in all things. Me, I'm all or nothing in most things. With lc that's a good thing...but with other things, maybe not so much. So I think he thinks that I just get "too" lc and should try out moderation....and be able to enjoy some things some times. I really don't think he's trying to derail me....he's trying to be helpful. With that said, maybe it would be helpful for me to just sit down with him and lay it all out....that I can't just have one bite because it's like drugs or alcohol to an addict. I think he would understand better.

He really is a good husband that has my best interest in mind....I just don't think he can wrap his mind around me needing to eat this way ALWAYS - EVERY DAY - EVERY BITE. It's taken me SIX years to get it...and he's just sitting on the sidelines - and, yes, many times cheering me on.

I'm SO glad I asked this question and SO glad for the responses. I've gotten some wonderful advice. Thank you all.
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