...you know, a new members joins and states something like, "hi, I'm so depressed I have to lose this 10 pounds and thought I would join for the support".

I'm curious as to how this makes you feel

I would like to say it doesnt effect me. BUUUTTTT... some days it does. Mostly I think that some people feel heavy at 100lbs, and everyone has a desired body size and weight, but on days when I am looking at the scale and it says 215 and then someone says they want to loost 5lbs and they alreayd weigh 110 its a bit frustrating.

SImilarly a girl in my office is like a size 2 and she claims shes on SB while eating choclates and drinking hot cocoa and soda, and then says how fat she is. I wanna shake her some days.

It depends on the tone of the post, the person's attitude in general, and how I'm feeling about myself that day, to be perfectly honest. Most of the "Double Digits Club" deserve applause for catching it and taking positive action before it gets out of control.

The ones you probably mean are the ones who will just DIE OF FATNESS at an actually very healthy weight...

Most of the time, I pretty much let someone else handle those, since although I USED to be thin and feel that way about my "extra 10", it's hard to convey concern or even offer advice to some without being accused of being jealous.

Like the others said, it just kind of depends....I think there is a place here for everyone and at least two of the people I feel the closest to here probably have under 20 to lose...if not ten, but I think when they are supportive of others....sometimes I don't notice that they have so little to go....and that they started out that way. But those I have met through other means and gotten to know in challenges, etc.

I guess in general though I usually kind of skip those posts and figure people in the same boat as them will pop in and share their thoughts, but I don't tend to think I have much to offer them, but then I skip technical diet questions that I don't feel qualified to answer, too.

If they're a newbie posting an intro thread, then I just roll my eyes and move on to the next one. When I have some time, I do like to leave welcome posts for newbies... but I'll admit that I'll be less likely to post a welcome to someone with stats like 130/129/115 than I will if they have a lot more to lose. Why, just today I ignored one in the South Beach forum.

If I've been seeing the user posting around the boards and sharing with the group, then I might not even notice their stats, as ginyer said. But if the only vibes the person gives off is "I'm a leech" then I steer clear of 'em.

It's funny that you brought this up, because I have been noticing that I've been doing this a lot lately, enough to notice it even before this thread. Maybe it's because there have been so many that I'm skipping over these days. Could it be because swimsuit season is coming up, and people are looking for a quick-fix? Heaven forbid they'll have to wear a one-piece!

I hate them!! not really, but I do feel jealous. I wish I had been smart enough when I was only 10 or 20 overweight to seek out a solution.
On the other hand, if it is a person who is calling themselves a cow, fat, etc. etc. but only needs to lose a couple of lbs. it makes me feel like, man, if they think that of themselves when they are only slightly overweight, they must really think badly of me. That's kind of intimidating and gives me that little insecure twinge that I hate.

as all of us will find out those last 10 pounds will be the hardest. i think that everybody sees themselves differently than other people do. i know that i'm probably old by most people's standards, but i still see myself as young. it's how you feel that counts. if you'll feel better losing 10 lbs at 130 go for it. if you'll feel better losing 10 lbs at 230 than stop there. if your happy with yourself, who cares what others think

I don't believe that a person who has never been grossly overweeight has any idea of what a TDCer goes thru or has gone thru. We have no reference points concerning weightloss and health-gain that are similar. After reading a thousand comments from those outside the TDC realm, I generally pass over their comments as useless to me. I generally stay within the confines of the TDC as YOU know from where I come and the paths ahead of me. Some have been there and cleared the way for me and others follow behind as I chart a course of my own.
Take this as you will...I have been judged too often by those "normal" based on my size and not on my abilities. Funny thing, that. It tends to make me judgemental toward their abilities to understand anything I go thru or face.
Not being ugly...just truthful.
BUT....if it is a TDCer that is down to just 10 pounds to go? Hell...I am the biggest cheerleader in the pack.

I feel sorry for some of the people like that. You look at their stats and their pictures, and think they have it made, then you read their journals and find out how neurotic and dysmorphic they are. I have to lose twice their entire body weight, and am much more sanguine about it than they are about losing a few pounds (in one case I know of, less than a pound).

One of the (few) advantages of being grossly overweight is that you are forced to develop a world view that is largely independent of your physical appearance. You become less vain, and more self accepting -- hell, you have to. There's freedom in that. Many of the people here are losing weight because of health issues, not because they want the hottest bod on the beach, or whatever. It seems like a much healthier motivation to me. Some of those women absolutely take my breath away. They should be out there living life to the fullest; instead they are here agonizing over a problem that we, who have the gun of ill health pointed at our temples, would love to have.

Its funny because me and my best friend were just talking about that yesterday...she says a girl who she eats lunch with is on atkins and weighs like 120 and shes trying to lose 20 pounds....i was like WHOA!!! but the funny thing is she is going about induction the wrong way because shes eating breaded chicken nuggets and then a salad!!! But I agree with whoever said that if they feel like they are fat at a low weight...what do they think about people who are bigger like me

this may not be my place to reply, but for what it's worth, i think those people with just 10 lbs to lose (and in same cases the ones lamenting about that 1 little pound) are just way too wrapped up in themselves to give anyone else a thought.

It only bothers me when they are at a healthy weight already and want to lose more. Obsessed much?

But on the other hand, it has to do with each person not feeling comfortable in their own skin. Last time I was thin, at 145, I moved to Calgary and crept to 156, and felt horrible, horrible. So it's a matter of being accustomed to a certain size and discomfort when you gain.

Last time on my way UP to 178, I felt like a pig. now I feel sexy, because I'm happier at 178 then I was at 197. Everything is relative.

Like others, I wonder what they must think about me if they complain about being HUGE at 120lbs. BUT everyone is here for support. And I realize that 120lbs can actually look less than fabulous on someone with a teeny tiny frame. I originally had a tendency to just ignore those people or get angry because they couldnt possibly have to lose that, or have any "real" issues. But now I'm trying really hard to understand that 1- they may have alot of weight issues (whether mental or physical), and 2- many of us have a different perception of ourselves than others do. Also, if they are here for support, and actually willing to TAKE the advice offered rather than try to get people to tell them what they want to hear, then I will try to be supportive of those with 300lbs to lose and those with 10lb to lose (though I do definitely think that there are different challenges that we face depending on how much we have to lose).

SJKLing

HARSH!

(I know I shouldn't technically be posting here, but I'm closer to TDC than 10 pound neurotic)...

... but you guys have already expressed my feelings so well:





AMEN!!