49 years old. Been overweight since I was in my early 20s. Morbidly obese since 30.

Twice I have broken the (hard to even fathom) 500lb mark. Once when I was 38. Lost 105 (went from 504 to 399)...regained it.

Was 502 March 18th of this year. Decided to keep my carbs below 25 and calories below 2000.

Day 70 was this week, down to 448. I appreciate that 54lbs is real and I do feel different. Shirts I couldn't wear last year I can now etc. However, I've been down this road before and can't help but have this voice constantly whisper "so what's going to be the reason you fail this time?"

When I started this latest attempt, I was (aprox) 400 days until my 50th birthday. I worried that maybe I couldn't burn on ketosis like before etc, but so far that's not the case. I eat 1 or 2 meals a day, and to be honest am not usually hungry (which has been great for savings on groceries)

I'm not sure what I expect from this forum. I should be happy that the first 72 days are behind me, and that I'm closer to my goal etc. However, like other addicts, logic doesn't always play into the decision to cheat etc. I've never had a successful cheat "day". A cheat day invariably becomes a month or year etc. So if I do post or blog here, I doubt you'll see me mention a cheat day in my near future.

There's many things wrong with reaching this weight (besides the health issues). The lack of a social life. The inability to take a normal bath etc.

444 will be a number I am hoping to see soon. Previous times I was over that weight and hit 444, I was able to sit in movie theater seats etc, so I'm hoping to pass that one in the next few weeks.

I have lost (and regained) 65 lbs (2006), 105 lbs (2008), 80 lbs (2014) - so I can't get too excited about 52 lbs. If I'm still posting when I'm below 350, then I might believe that this time is for real.

28 (I think) days until day 100. I have zero fear that I'll make it to day 100. I know I can do that much.