Hi Liz,
Have you considered talking to someone professional about your relationship with food (both the feelings of helplessness/loss of control and overly fixated/rigid)?
Obviously both are bad for you, and rarely (if ever) about the food. A therapist might help you figure out what is really going on, which will allow you to stay low carb, healthy, and most importantly not "afraid" of food either.

Hope you are doing ok today.