Hi all,
Lori---Wow on your BIL. Don't blame you a bit for your rant, it IS scary. Can your hubby explain to him how dangerous this is? Probably he's tried many times. But geez, I don't know if it's fair to continue to expect you to host him overnight if he's going to drink and do his meds. Not to mention he could seriously hurt himself. Sorry you had to go thru this. Very disconcerting.
Trigger---You are SO RIGHT girl. I WAS "walking towards this blowout." Been building up for awhile, and I was having fun last night, blowing off stress, and a big what-the-heck mood swallowed me whole. You know how much I agree, this just cannot happen again any time soon.
I love your idea of flower boxes. They are so much easier to care for. You might want to check out paver bricks as well as the concrete. They can be really pretty.
Nic---Hope you're having a totally chill Saturday!
K-mom---Now that I've met your SD, I just smile as you describe her, because I can picture her exuberance. That is a gift you have given her---the energy to love big and be loved. But I can see how her attachment to you can be taxing. Does she like to read or watch a captioned movie? Just wondering if you have ways to get a bit of a break here and there. But I can see how her shining love for you is so hard to say no to.
Really drinking the water today to try to drown some of the damage from last night. expect to do 5/3 today, Saturday.
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I decided to spank myself a bit today and go to TJ Max.
Not a great day to try on clothes, as I'm bloaty to the max after last night. It has been over 2 months since I've bought a thing, or been to TJ Max, which is like a record for me, and it was a gorgeous fall day and I wanted something for back to school.
Glad I went. If you're looking for a wake up call, put yourself in a dressing room with a bunch of cute stuff. I knew it was going to be shall we say, somewhat FREAKING uncomfortable, which is what I had in mind, to be honest. Sounds weird, I know, but clothing has always shown me where I'm at more than the scale ever did.
And I don't like where I'm at. Must address. NOW.
Still, did find a couple of things. Best was an inspiration piece! Something I used to depend on when I was working my way down the scale, and haven't bought myself one in a long time, even though I've needed one.
So I got this totally FAB pair of very slim cut pants, black with the most subtle faded looking gray roses here and there. May sound strange, but they are so elegant. And I can wear them now, but not without just the right long top. On the back of my bedroom door they go, where I will see them every day with my goal in mind---to be able to wear them without having to drown my mid section in so much material!
I spent just $53, and got the pants, and two incredible tops, one I can't describe and the other a black knit diagonal zip, to the hip jacket with a great V-neck lapel, that looks good on me now, and that I will wear w/jeans or skirts or slim black pants. I can tell this is something I will wear over and over again. Flattering in its tailoring, sleek and neat looking.
Thing is, I have always believed in feeling good in what I wear, it adds a bounce to my step. And even though I'm not happy with where I'm at weight wise, I STILL need to feel good in my clothes.
So part misery, part fun, BIG part inspiration to get myself back on track in a more major way. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
And it's not just about last night, which I would have weathered fine if I hadn't been creeping my way up and along for awhile now. Time to stop that business.
Fasted all day. Will have very low carb dinner, not sure what yet, but it won't be big. Always thankful that hog wilders tire me out food wise, AND mentally, and I'm not craving a darn thing. Not even hungry. Wheeeeeew. What a relief.
And today, that's my story, morning glories.