i started having joint pain, sometimes excrutiating in my thirties. I'm 49 now. I had a pretty good doc at the time who ruled out other stuff pretty quickly and came to fibromyalgia. She sent me a big shot rheumatoid specialist to confirm. He ran a lot of tests on me, spend a couple hours with me and concurred: fibromyalgia plus light arthritis.. My arthritis more serious now, mostly my knees . . but that's another illness that shows up in x-rays. No one questions the xrays.

My good, primary doctor referred me to a six week clinic that helped people learn how to cope with fibromyalgia. To get my insurance to cover it I had to pick up the specialist's diagnosis. He was at a behemoth hospital so I went in person to get the report. My doc had requested twice and never gotten it.

So I had a chance to read the jerk's report. He spelled out all the physical stuff that led him to diagnose fibromyalgia, evaluation he had done, etc. HIS CONCLUSION, however, was that I was extremely unlikely to be open to treatment. "These people, who are so obese, are not very treatable" he wrote to my doctor.

The medical field is getting crazier and crazier. If he thought my fibro came from obesity, why wouldn't he just diagnose my problem as obesity.

The clinic, BTW, helped me tremendously. I know each fibro sufferer has different thresholds of suffering and pain so my experience might not directly relate to the next victim of this illness. But I have learned how to be pretty darn good at managing fibro.

The key, for me, is to sleep well. Docs don't know what causes fibro but many have concluded that poor sleep contributes to it. I believe rhythym to sleep is very important so I have become fanatical about going to bed at the same time. I have long periods when I take a sleep aid. If I wait up unrested a few mornings in a row, I'm back on the sleep aid asap.

Another key for me has been exercise, esp. swimming because it puts no pressure on joints.

And another key has been surrender.

I weighed 330 back in the days when I was diagnosed and I weigh a lot less now . . . and that helps but I still have fibro.

I have been under intense stress the last two weeks and for the last week my fibro has flared up as painfully as it can get. Everything hurts. I am exhuasted every moment. I'm not sleeping, even with sleep aids.

But I have been on the path to treat myself better for a long time. It takes too long but change takes as long as it takes.

The most important element of managing my fibro is self love.