Does anyone understand?

[PhoenixEav]

I'm just wondering... Does anyone understand how hard it is for some of us who are emotional eaters to resist sugary/carby foods when things aren't going so well? Like that the feelings you get from not eating the stuff when it's put in front of you are worse then when you actually do? Sometimes the cravings just drive you nuts until you give in... (I'm not asking for sympathy, I'm just curious if anyone actually understands the issues that some people, including me have, and are willing not to bash us when we mess up and say we couldn't resist giving in.)


Sorry, I'm just confused at the moment as to whether or not people are supportive of the "weaker willed" of us on here... Don't think I'll be posting in the confessions booth for awhile...

Oh... And if you're going to bash me on this thread too, I'm not even going to reply... So if you don't have something nice to say, don't bother, because I'm not going to argue back...

[cs_carver]

The bit about "when it's put in front of you..." HC food is never "put in front of me," but I run my own kitchen.

I'm guessing there might also be some other stuff tied up with eating HC food, given that it is being "put in front of you," and presumably, someone else who may not be supportive of your decisions is doing the cooking.

What I know is that I rarely get cravings to eat high carb food when I am eating LC, getting all the supplements I need, and am not faced with supplies of HC products. Even grocery stores are really not very tempting, given a decent base of clean eating.

Carby food becomes much harder to resist if I have been eating carby food, unfortunately.

Good luck.

[Kristine]

I understand it. Not only is it a junk addiction, but I was basically treating my anxiety and depression with food from the time I was about 14.

Part of me will always fight it. It doesn't just go away after a certain amount of weeks of LCing - I have to be mindful to keep it at bay. It's sort of like housecleaning, I guess. Right now, I'm having a really hard time. I'm extremely anxious. That's why I stuck the "cheat-free" in my sig. I'm having a hard time staying on the straight n' narrow. I'm barely doing it. It's taking a lot of focus.

Sometimes, if I'm struggling, the presence of junk food is enough to eliminate my ability to participate in a conversation. Seriously. I nod and smile and I won't remember anything you said the next day, because I was so distracted.

It sucks.

I read your other thread and I think you're being unfair accusing "people" or "us" of "bashing" you because one person replied from a different perspective than addiction. We ARE a supportive bunch here, but we won't support the addiction talking through you... the rationalization. 99% of the time, when people post an "ahead of time" post, they want to be talked out of giving up. Now you're in the right forum for lovins'. :there:

There's no moral obligation either way. I eat higher-carb stuff quite often, if it's worth it to me. Sometimes I consider it a big deal - like if I know I was only eating to soothe myself. Most of the time, it isn't. The key for me is exercising, taking fish oils, and eating good, nutritious, non-triggering LC food. When my moods are more stable, junk food isn't even a blip on my radar.

Some people take an absolute 100% abstinence approach to food addiction, some are okay eating carbier foods on occasion. Don't let minor differences of opinion scare you away; stick around. Good luck on your journey working your way through it. :rheart:

(ETA) Something else that helps me is to consider the concept of the addiction being a seperate entity. See the link in this thread. (http://forum.lowcarber.org/showthread.php?t=335611) There's no point in beating yourself up for cheating, but it sure makes sense to me to get ANGRY at that other entity and tell it off!

[MorganMac]

I do understand it! It's largely how I got into this mess in the first place!

My family was big on "here, have a cookie, you'll feel better..." lol (not that I blame them AT ALL for my weight problem) but I learned that food was a great emotional tool early on in life.

The way that I have conquered my emotional need for food was through a lot of counseling and personal reflection. I was able to identify the main emotions that made me want to eat and the foods associated with the emotions. I learned to separate physical cravings with emotional ones and what the physical cravings often indicate.

Sugary, carb-laden foods DO release chemicals in the body that make you feel good, but only for a very short time. Once that wears off, we generally feel worse than we did before, so we eat more sugary foods. It's a vicious cycle.

It is not easy to learn to replace those emotional food needs with non-food actions or objects or to constantly keep oneself in check, but it can be done with a lot of soul searching and honest communication with someone that can help you identify your triggers.

Food can be a coping mechanism just as powerful as alcohol, gambling and other addictive behaviours. For me, this psychological aspect of weight loss has been AS important as adhering to a good diet plan.

[justleah]

I have to say I was a little more than shocked to read that you feel you have been "bashed" by people here on the forum. I have found nothing but support and encouragement here. Granted it's not always easy to hear some things that we need to hear but that's part of the support we all need. Good luck to you with your struggles. You certainly are not alone with them.
Leah

[ElleH]

Boy do I understand. After years of destructive binge eating behavior and yo-yo dieting I finally decided that I was done with it. That I was NOT going to numb my unpleasant feelings any longer. I was going to face them and deal with them. No matter how bad they are--anger, depression, boredom, anxiety, fear.

After reading your profile, and seeing that you're still very young, I feel for you. You're having to choose from what is served to you, I assume. In that case, you will have to begin to face your feelings and take control of what goes into your mouth. No, you can't control what is put in front of you, but you can control what goes in your mouth. You can also ask for certain things to eat from your parents, I hope. My binge eating started when I was a teenager living at home and I pray that your situation is not what mine was.

I'm 31 days binge-free now, which is not the longest I've gone, by any means, but for the first time I feel hopeful that that behavior no longer controls me.

Good luck! I really do feel for you.

And I second that advice to read about the addictive voice. It was actually that website that has given me the power over my need to binge.

[LoveMyGSDs]

I can't say that I understand because I'm not an emotional eater. In fact, when I'm very upset I don't eat at all.

I do want to say that I'm very sorry that you don't feel supported. Have you sought help for the underlying emotional problems?

[potatofree]

It's something I struggle with every day.

[nole1984]

..Believe me... I do understand! I truly believe that you'll get more support than silliness on this forum! I know that I will support you, nonjudgementally, and expect the same

[3shewolf8]

I do understand also. It is so hard to get over emotional eating. I found what helps me is looking in the mirror, and saying that even if I eat it won't really help me feel better, and it also helps if I drink a bottle of water, then go for a walk, a fast walk, it burns off the thoughts and stress, and it makes me feel better knowing that I am helping my body instead of undoing all of the hard work I went through to get where I am. Some people tell me I am just replacing one "addiction" (food) with another, (exercise or shopping), but at least the last two options won't make me gain my weight back!

[cartersg1]

My sugar addiction led to alcoholism - not a pretty picture. At least I was a happy drunk. :) It led to bouts of depression but I do have to COMPLETELY stay away from all sugar - honey, molasses, cane juice, corn syrup. It will push back down the binge cycle. I know when I really got out of control with my weight and alcohol had a lot to do with it.

I know someone who does not keep junk food around his house, as far as I know. I've never been in his house. :) He relies on other people to bring in chocolate and junk stuff to the office (my offering was chocolate-dipped biscotti one day). He's FANTASTIC and I mean ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC shape. Not mincing words here - he's climbed one particular trail TWICE in one day. And we're talking stairs and a 2000 ft. gain in elevation, practically straight up. Jeez, man...I thought when I heard that. You need another hobby, dude! But hey, it works. Not eating junk food, sugary snacks and fast food along with daily exercise works.

I am an emotional eater. It's tough, really tough. If I can get away from the emotions, literally change venues, I'm okay. But if I'm stuck inside with nothing to do, it's tough. I hate winter with a passion. It's usually too cold to go anywhere - rain I can handle; blowing snow with biting cold is awful. And that's when I binge most frequently (SADD is tough to handle). As long as I can stay busy, occupied, I'm good. I won't binge. Thank goodness for archaeology field work this summer and a quick camping trip in August before school starts!!

But you have to get it out of the house and I don't care what anyone else says. It took my husband a couple of years to understand WHY I can't even have chips in the house. I have NO cookies, nothing that could really screw up and make me very, very sick again. I know how I felt before and I don't want to feel that way again. He comes from a family where sugary food means love - love for me are apples and carrots that my daughter can grab as a snack at any time. Love is keeping her healthy; not giving her a cookie. Cold turkey was really bad - I did go through withdrawal. It doesn't I still don't crave something - as I posted elsewhere, I REALLY wanted some red wine and chocolate last month. It was an emotional thing worked out through serious physical labor for four days straight and a couple of distractions from friends (movie night and girl talk for a couple of hours). There is no easy answer - just figure out what triggers and be ready, be prepared to meet the challenge and banish it. Easier said than done but you will a ton better.

[kuukuu]

Emotional eating? Welcome to my planet, Phoenix. It's been a struggle to overcome even the daily triggers for scarfing down "mass quantities" of my favorite "recreational drugs". Not that I have finally overcome them, but I can certainly understand what you're up against. You can go through my journal if you like. A monument on-line to my own brain-dead behaviours that drive me, and everybody who cares about me way over the edge. Have you started a journal yet? When you go through mine, please forgive my ramblings, just hard sometimes for me to deal with life when my head is under water, LOL!

[jddistef]

Phoenix, I understand. I am going through a major depression right now, my life sucks. Trying to go LC is killing me because all I want to do is grab the Lucky Charms and eat the marshmallows out of the box.

But I've gone LC because my blood sugar was climbing dangerously close to diabetes. That scared me. It also stresses me. It's a tough place to be in.

I'm losing weight, which is helpful in keeping motivated, and the first few weeks, I ate lots of sugar free jello and whipped cream (which may have slowed down my losses, but I need it...).

I switched to CALP so I don't feel as deprived, and can eat one meal with whatever carbs I like, in proportion to protein and veg. It gives me something to look forward to and keeps me on track the rest of the day.

So, yes, I know what it feels like to want to stress eat. But I know I could end up with diabetes if I do. I suppose fear is as good a deterrant as any...

[+35-65]

You are not alone and anyone who bashes you is a moron. I sincerely believe in food addiction. And just like depression can either be influenced by events in our lives or purely a chemical imbalance, I believe food addiction is based in the same roots. There are people who have "learned" to use food to medicate and there are some people who have a physical reaction to some foods affect their moods and use it to control or numb.

If I get very upset - usually angry - I will become physically shakey, anxious and unstable - will blow up at anything. But, if I stuff myself full of carbs, I am able to get control of myself and my emotions. And of course, once I start eating the carbs, it is soooooooo hard to stop. I really don't think it is a headgame or a matter of will power. I think it is a true physical addiction.

Unfortunately, the only cure for addiction is abstinence. And you can't exactly remain abstient from food, so it will always remain a battle for you. I try my darndest to stay abstinent from what I know my trigger foods are, but there is no amount of will that can beat that NEED to eat once it sets in. I still fall off the wagon, but I have learned to jump back on much more quickly, and occasionally avoid the binge all together.

So, no. You are not weak or stupid or anything else because of your binge eating, food addiction or whatever you would like to call it. But, you will always have to fight harder than everyone else. It is a fight that will be with you for life. You will find that you start to have more good days than bad days, but it will be something that is on your mind every day.

I know my views on this aren't popular. A lot of people do believe there is a "cure" and it is a matter of will. There are people who say that it is unhealthy and disordered to think about what and how you eat every day of your life. But I think that there are some of us who are in a whole different game and we can't always do what the rest of the world tells us is normal. We need to figure out our own way to be healthy and survive.

[mathmaniac]

I succumbed last night to this craving for a zuchhini pancake. If ever I felt 'one' with a compulsive person, who compulsively shops, compulsively pulls their hair out, compulsively cleans, whatever, it was last night. Why couldn't I just put the brakes on? Dunno. That's compulsion, I guess, and I get it when I'm emotionally stressed - and then I feel relief afterwards - and then the emotional stress is back.