people tell me i look good... why don't i believe it then?

[sxb]

Y'all...
i feel weird these days... i know i have lost weight i can see the scale and how my close fit me better...
my semester started and since then i have gotten... "oh my god... u look great!" ... and i even turned faces...
butttt.... i don't believe that i am doing good... i don't feel i am good looking...

what's wrong with me? how can i convince myself...? just a "oh ur beautiful."..doesn't do it for me... I wish i wasn't this much dependable on how others see me...

[caroline12]

First I'd like to say good job on how far you have come with your weight loss.... :cheer:

My husband tells me all the time that he loves me and that I am pretty, but its really hard to get past that when you feel bad about yourself.

That's how I felt and that is why I started this diet. Keep telling yourself that you look good, say to yourself "look how far I have come"

If you say it enough you will begin to believe it. :D

[3shewolf8]

Have you been told that you look bad before? I found out that if you have been told that you are fat, and don't look good for awhile, it is hard to believe that you do look good. Look in the mirror. Do you like the way that you look? If so, believe them, if not, make yourself like the way you look. You have to love yourself before you will believe others.

[sxb]

thanks guys... i am working on it... day by day.
i think it has to do with my past... i was always pushed away by a guy for another girl... so i never felt good enough.
But i know things are different now...since i am getting treated better... but it will take me time to register all of this....
thanks for listening

[WyoDiva]

It took me a while for my mental image of self to catch up with the reality. But - that's the good thing about losing weight slowly; it gives our brains time to adjust to our changing bodies. I couldn't see it for a while either, but eventually...yes. Now, I'm astonished when I look in the mirror...who is that hot-looking chick?

People often see the change before I do. Lately, people are bugging me hard about how good I look/how slim. When this happens,I realize that means one of two things: one, that my behavior has changed again/positively (i.e. I'm more confident, happier, and outgoing that I used to be, and it's obvious), or two, that my body shape is subtly shifting again, and though I can't see it yet, others CAN, esp. because there's a lot of people who care about me closely watching my journey and my changes, physical and mental.

Give yourself time...study yourself in the mirror. Get to know the new, slimmer you. Talk to yourself - positively. Tell yourself how beautiful, hot, thin, incredible, strong you are...while looking in your eyes in the mirror.

And thank people and smile when they tell you how good you look. Repeat what they said to yourself while studying yourself in the mirror.

Your self-perception will slowly shift. Hang in there! :bhug:

[3shewolf8]

You are so right WyoDiva! When someone compliments you, smile and thank them. Fight the urge to argue. I used to say things like, "I still have so far to go", or I would make a face, and ask "are you serious?", Then, I read it in here somewhere, to smile and say thank you. When I started doing that, it made it much easier to believe what they were saying. I was just told today by a friend that she was jealous of how good I am looking, and that she wishes she could look this good. That is the first time in my entire life anyone has ever said that to me. I thanked her, told her that she made my day by noticing my weight loss, and told her how easy it is to do Atkins once you get past the first two weeks. I then printed off the induction rules and acceptable foods list off of the Atkins website, gave them to her, only to be told that there is no way she can give up bread and potatoes. She won't even try. So, the next time she compliments me, I will smile and just say thank you.

[sxb]

well, i tired something to convince myself...
i went to the store and bought a small longsleeved t-shirt... it's SMALL! non strechy... :)
and i put it on... and i noticed i didn't get stuck trying it on!!!!!
usually i would get stuck around my shoulder...
....
i think i am gonna use this strategy to convince myself.... my goal is to see if i can do the same with petite size jeans... i have bought one loooong time ago... hoping to fit into it one day... i think if i fit in it.. then i'll be waaaaaaaaaay convinced... cuz that jeans was tailored to NOT hide the flaws...( if u know what i mean)...

just taking it day by day... hugs to you all... keep it up!