Getting Flak About Being "Too Thin"?

[Cazzi 8]

Hi everybody,

I am about to turn 60 and am 5'3" tall, weight is 105 lbs. Yes, I have facial wrinkles, but have had those for a long time :lol: Anyway, I'm feeling great about my weight but several of my friends/acquaintances give me a hard time about:

* Did you know that being too thin at OUR age can really show in your face?
* You look emaciated.
* Your weight would be okay if you were younger but...

One of my friends said the first thing after initially telling me that I look great and then asking if I had lost more weight.

Instead of making excuses for my "thinness," I responded that I'd rather have a fit body, the heck with the wrinkles which I have anyway and which don't seem to have gotten any worse).

Well, anywat my point is: I'm getting really ticked at people (most of whom are overweight always trying to lose weight) making me feel funny about losing weight. I was originally 132 pounds before my loss, BTW.

Anyone else identify?

Cazzi

[JAnn]

I wish I could--but no one's complained that I'm too thin!:lol: Maybe one day soon. BTW I am almost 60 myself.

[WyoDiva]

I have started to catch a little bit of this...and I expect to get more since I hope to lose a few more pounds. My response to those sorts of comments will hopefully be diplomatic, but will more likely involve the 'f' word for those who are too persistent/nosey...:lol: IT'S NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS!!!

[sprtbichic]

I get this alot! I live in a different town and have several different friends that I did not have in the years past. Therefore they have not seen the thinner ME. So now they say, you are so thin don't lose anymore weight. Some out of jealousy I know. But then others who just meet me say that I look great.

I know that I look good, but most of all I feel good!! :agree:

[Dodger]

Welcome to the 60's!

It sounds like those who are criticizing you are just showing some jealousy. When I notice wrinkles in my mirror, I just take my glasses off and the wrinkles disappear.

Stick your tongue out at those who complain.

[TarHeel]

Okay. I'll be the goat. I agree with your friends. Of course I haven't seen what you look like, but I"m older and shorter than you are and I am concerned about how gaunt my face is looking. I look lots older in photos than I did three years and 30 some pounds ago.

My health (as measured by blood pressure and cholesterol stuff) is better, but I look a lot older than I'd like to.

And I think your initial weight was about right for your height and age.

You can't turn back time. Face it.

Kay

[JAnn]

Welcome to the 60's!
When I notice wrinkles in my mirror, I just take my glasses off and the wrinkles disappear.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: My sentiments exactly. I guess that's the only good thing about having to wear glasses!

[L2P]

Hey, you now have an excuse to eat carbs... :):):) IN FRONT OF THEM!!!!

sorry... i didn't mean to be mean... lol. It's all about how you feel.

[Cazzi 8]

It IS nice having a carb cushion, so to speak :lol: Thanks to everyone for your feedback. Love this forum.

Cazzi

[cab54]

Tsk! Aren't people irritating? LOL! Ten years ago, I lost a lot of weight. (It's Baaaackkkk).

People (even my mother, and I was 42) were saying I was too, this, I would just look gaunt as I got older, I was on my way to being anorexic...... ;)

Ya know what? I am going to get older. See? Look! I'm 52 now! :lol: But why do people think keeping some extra weight on is going to aid you in looking better? Actually, if I *have* to look oder, I'd rather be slim than look *fat* and older.

Hmm--let's see---slim and older----or----fat and older. :daze: Let me think......

Jealous, I say. All of 'em. :D :D

[mskllsws]

I am 52, and must admit that after losing 110 pounds I had a lower face/neck lift because I didn't like the chicken neck. Look at my photo gallery to see my before during and after photos.

Now since the surgery people have guessed my age in the 30's. I would say losing 20 years off my age is good results for the surgery.

When I mention that I want to lose another ten+ pounds I get those comments too, like where do you have to lose weight? Wondering what I am not happy with.

I was a size 26 and now fit into a few 8s and mostly 10s. Considering that the average American woman is a size 14 I think i am doing great, and according to the doctors charts I still need to take off that other ten pounds.

By doctors charts a woman of five foot three should weigh 115 pounds on average, unless your bone structure is very small. There is a range with 115 being the average. You may indeed be a little underweight. At 132 you were 17 pounds overweight, and now you are 10 pounds underweight. If you are small framed, then 110 might be just right.

I agree that a lot of this is jealousy. I have not had anything but praise from my friends. The few who are surprised when i say I would like to lose a few more pounds are friends who are bigger than I and are probably projecting,
since I am smaller than they are, I am fine the way I am. I don't let it bother me.

I am in the best shape of my life right now and very happy.
Karen

[CaseyH]

I think they are just jealous Cazzi. Many people reach a certain age and figure..."Why change now? What would be the point?" But you've taken responsibility to get in shape, so if you're happy and healthy, what are a few wrinkles? Everyone gets them eventually.

My nana is 64 (I am 24) and she's been overweight since I was born. She is the kindest woman, I love her to pieces. And I think she is just beautiful. Of course I don't care what she looks like, but I know my mom and her mother make comments on her weight behind her back, saying she should lose some weight. The funny thing is, my mom told me when my Nana was in her 30's, she was always super slim, tall and skinny like a model, but ALWAYS dieting. She never got to eat what she wanted, and was always trying to look good for everyone else. When she became a grandmother, she stopped worrying about it. And I think she's beautiful and fantastic with or without a few extra pounds.

My point is that someone will always have an opinion...whether they think you're too heavy or too thin...or you have too many wrinkles or whatever. How exhausting to try and please everyone! It's how you feel and how you treat others that really counts.

[lizzyLC]

You should compare your BMI's together - that may shut them up. By one chart you're 19.5 - approx. 3 pounds away from the low end of "ideal". It depends on bone structure and probably what chart you're looking at.

[faydunaway]

I can't believe it but this 4th at a picnic my friends that I see once a month told me that I really only needed to lose 10 more lbs.

HA! They of course don't know how much I weigh or that I plan to lose 43 more lbs.

I think it is politeness in some instances, concern or jealousy in others. WHatever it is I am just happy that someone has noticed. I will deal with it as it comes.

[flynn]

When I lost a lot of weight previously, people certainly would comment. However, mostly they asked, "Are you ill? Are you OK?".
It was clear this was from concern. It's been my experience that often the people you see who look thinner have a disease or a significant illness.
Anyway, that's been my experience. As others have said, ignore them or you might even say, "Gee, that comment hurts my feelings." Wonder what might happen then.
Keep on going!

[DrH]

I hear it from everyone - I just think "no Sh.t Shirlock". People can be brutal! Nobody ever came up to me and said "You are a fat crap". However, people have no problems telling me how skinny I am and mention their "sister's friend" who ate low carb but then died from anorexia. Thanks and no, I do not have an eating disorder. Low carb just works too well!

[Judynyc]

Well, being that this is the over 50 section.....and I'm way over 50 ;) I've gotten this kind of remark from a few people who were used to seeing my full moon face before.....one person actually told me that I should have plastic surgery, botox and other types of injections. Sheeesh!! :rolleyes:

Who asked them?! I would never say anything even remotely like that to anyone about their looks. I found it very insulting.....yes, I'm probably over reacting but at my age, what the hell do people expect when someone loses over 100 lbs.

This is actually one of my "excuses" for not going down to 150...so it won't show in face any more than it does now. :daze:

[CooknCajun]

I get this as well. The people in my life now have never seen me at my thinner weight. Of course, that's been 10 years ago! I'm in my early 40s plus I've lost over 50 lbs from my otherwise little frame.

I figure as long as I am getting my nutrients and vitamins, as long as my weight is stable, as long as my appetite is in control, I'm not letting the "oh, you are too skinny!" get to me. I know where my weight should be. If I have to deal with a little loose skin, so be it.

:-)

[Cazzi 8]

Cookn Cajun,

Right on! I have loose skin on my upper arms. Kinda like accordian pleats. Have to confess I feel a bit self-conscious in sleeveless stuff. So I just tan the dang things and let it all hang out. Golden brown pleats look healthier:lol:

[faydunaway]

Thanks! I will keep on and hope some day that I get comments that I'm too thin.

I would like to hear that once at least in my life. Its a daydream of mine.

Take care all.

[SRabbit]

I am pear shaped, so I get really thin in my face and above my waist before my lower half looks decent, so I know (from being thin when I was young) I am going to get this again....it's frustrating with my shape, but I'd rather have the comments and be happy with how I look---

I just figure they're jealous and if they can't say something nice they should just hush up!!!

[Born2run]

I lost quite a bit of weight a few years back and got the same flack. Don't do what I did and gain it back. If your feeling better that is the only thing that counts. Judy

[skeeweeaka]

There are always some people who seem to have something to say about your looks. I, too, would love to hear someone telll me how skinny I am...(heavy sigh). I'm determined to get there this year!

[SissyPoo]

I have never been too thin in my whole entire life...
I really think you are small enough though. Sounds like you are a nice size for your height.