my favourite holiday cookie recipe

[Outrider]

This is an superbly delicious recipe, achievable for even the
most novice baker, but the instructions must be followed
exactly for best results.

For those with health problems: why yes of course you may
leave out the salt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Favourite Holiday Cookie Recipe

1 cup of water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1
cup of brown sugar lemon juice 4 large eggs 1 cup nuts 2 cups
of dried fruit 1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequilla

Sample the Cuervo to check quality.

Take a large bowl:

Check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest
quality, pour one level cup and and sip while preparing
ingredients and equipment.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large
fluffy bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK,
try another cup ... just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl
and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit
off floor.. . Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck
in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.

Check the Jose Cuervo.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table.
Add a spoon of sugar, or somefing. Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to
fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw
the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make
sure to put the stove in the wahshsher dishes thingey.

HAPPY!! ............ pfltiztliptzzzzzzz

[Cheri]

I think this is hilarious. Thanks for posting it. :-)

--
Cheri

outrider wrote in message
<1134499558.502048.226900@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>...
>This is an superbly delicious recipe, achievable for even the
>most novice baker, but the instructions must be followed
>exactly for best results.
>
>For those with health problems: why yes of course you may
>leave out the salt.
>
>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
>My Favourite Holiday Cookie Recipe
>
>1 cup of water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1
>cup of brown sugar lemon juice 4 large eggs 1 cup nuts 2 cups
>of dried fruit 1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequilla
>
>Sample the Cuervo to check quality.
>
>Take a large bowl:
>
>Check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest
>quality, pour one level cup and and sip while preparing
>ingredients and equipment.
>
>Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large
>fluffy bowl.
>
>Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
>
>At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK,
>try another cup ... just in case.
>
>Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the
>bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging
>fruit off floor.. . Mix on the turner. If the fried druit
>gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a
>drewscriver.
>
>Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.
>
>Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.
>
>Check the Jose Cuervo.
>
>Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one
>table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefing. Whatever you
>can find.
>
>Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to
>fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally,
>throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and
>make sure to put the stove in the wahshsher dishes thingey.
>
>
>HAPPY!! ............ pfltiztliptzzzzzzz

[Willow]

tonsisticity ???????

ROTFL this is really funny !

--
Will~

"... so that's how liberty ends, in a round of applause."

Queen Amidala, The revenge of the Syth.

"outrider" <outrider@despammed.com> wrote in message
news:1134499558.502048.226900@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
> This is an superbly delicious recipe, achievable for even
> the most novice baker, but the instructions must be followed
> exactly for best results.
>
> For those with health problems: why yes of course you may
> leave out the salt.
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>
>
> My Favourite Holiday Cookie Recipe
>
> 1 cup of water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1
> cup of brown sugar lemon juice 4 large eggs 1 cup nuts 2
> cups of dried fruit 1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequilla
>
> Sample the Cuervo to check quality.
>
> Take a large bowl:
>
> Check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest
> quality, pour one level cup and and sip while preparing
> ingredients and equipment.
>
> Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a
> large fluffy bowl.
>
> Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
>
> At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK,
> try another cup ... just in case.
>
> Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the
> bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging
> fruit off floor.. . Mix on the turner. If the fried druit
> gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a
> drewscriver.
>
> Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.
>
> Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.
>
> Check the Jose Cuervo.
>
> Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one
> table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefing. Whatever you
> can find.
>
> Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not
> to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally,
> throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo
> and make sure to put the stove in the wahshsher dishes
> thingey.
>
>
> HAPPY!! ............ pfltiztliptzzzzzzz

[Montygram]

Leaving out salt will give you health problems. Big mistake in
this recipe are the eggs - that's a huge load of oxidized
cholesterol. I make breads with banana and coconut oil to
"butter" the sides of the pan, then I make a cannoli-type
cream from ricotta cheese and put it on the bread. A crips
bread can be made too, also without oils or cholesterol. In
this way, there is no oxidized cholesterol and you don't have
to use the dangerous, highly unsaturated oils.

[Cathyb]

montygram wrote:
> Leaving out salt will give you health problems. Big mistake
> in this recipe are the eggs - that's a huge load of oxidized
> cholesterol. I make breads with banana and coconut oil to
> "butter" the sides of the pan, then I make a cannoli-type
> cream from ricotta cheese and put it on the bread. A crips
> bread can be made too, also without oils or cholesterol. In
> this way, there is no oxidized cholesterol and you don't
> have to use the dangerous, highly unsaturated oils.

Oh, you poor thing.