almost there...98 lbs gone!

[Judynyc]

I feel so alone now.....I need to find others close to goal and who have lost a substantial amount of weight. I need to connect...please!!!

My life is so different, I'm being treated very differently....I find myself very angry at times because of this. Are you feeling this too?

Although I am loving how it feels to be this weight again, I had been obese for about 15-17 yrs. I had learned to act as if I was grateful for any bit of conversation anyone would give me.....now I walk with my eyes down to avoid having to talk about my weight loss. Am I alone in this too?

I am so sick and tired of reading about eating and drinking off plan...then how come I didn't lose wiehgt??????? Give me a break......I am so fed up!! I am not going to help any longer as it is just too painful and frustrating for me....am I alone in this too?

I hope to get some or any response to this. :D

[Enomarb]

hi Judy-

congrats on your success. Yes, it is very frustrating to read all of the "I ate a box of crispy cremes but I only had 5 Atkins bars all day- is that okay?" posts, but I guess everyone has to start somewhere. I don't think that it is my responsibility to inform these posters that their 'plan' will not work, so I usually don't respond. I also leave it to others to be cheerleaders. That said, I think we are all here to get/give support and that this WOL is hard. It is not normal in our society to eat the way we do- even though it is what our bodies need.
I have only lost 55 or so lbs, and although I was that overweight for 16 years I guess I was in denial that I was fat. I have been blown away by the things people say and the comments they make, but I am pretty oblivious to being treated different. I also do not want/choose to discuss my weight loss. when people ask me how much I say 'enough.' This is the only place I have my stats and ever talk pounds or size. So you're not alone.
So here is my response to you- and I have maintained and been fine for the last year- and it is year 2 OP for me.
And again- CONGRATS!
E

[Judynyc]

Thanks Eno!!


It sure does mean alot to know that I'm not alone as I was starting to feel like I was going crazy!! :lol:

Good job to you for exceeding your goal!! WOW!! You give me new hope!! :D

[KimNWI]

Just wanted to say congrats on your loss Judy that is a very awesome accomplishment. I am sure you are feeling a little funny about the attention your getting but you will get used to be HOT again :).

KimNWI

[Judynyc]

hehehe...thanks for the "HOT" thingy Kim! Its been a very long time that I've felt hot.... ;)

[Dodger]

I feel so alone now.....I need to find others close to goal and who have lost a substantial amount of weight. I need to connect...please!!!

My life is so different, I'm being treated very differently....I find myself very angry at times because of this. Are you feeling this too?

Although I am loving how it feels to be this weight again, I had been obese for about 15-17 yrs. I had learned to act as if I was grateful for any bit of conversation anyone would give me.....now I walk with my eyes down to avoid having to talk about my weight loss. Am I alone in this too?

I am so sick and tired of reading about eating and drinking off plan...then how come I didn't lose wiehgt??????? Give me a break......I am so fed up!! I am not going to help any longer as it is just too painful and frustrating for me....am I alone in this too?

I hope to get some or any response to this. :D

Judy,

You have done something that very few people have done. Take pride in your accomplishment! Shout it from the roof tops. Lift your head up and march proudly down the streets. You deserve a parade. Sit back, have a glass of wine and pat yourself on the back. Give yourself a round of applause.

Don't let those who refuse to take the steps to become healthier affect you. You can only advise and it is up to others as to whether they listen or not. Because of experience and knowledge that you have, many more listen and follow your advice than ignore it. Take pride in the fact that you have influenced many people to follow in your footsteps.

If you don't want to talk about your weight loss, change the conversation to how you have improved your health, or how the Yankees did. Weight loss was just one result of the choices you made to improve your life. Healthy eating is about more than losing weight. It is about making decisions and knowing that the foods your eat are what makes your body better, no matter what your weight is.

I sense from your post that you are feeling a little aimless now that your weight loss journey is near an end. It has been a part of you for quite a while and you need to set another objective for yourself. Perhaps you could write a book about what you learned during the adventure and how others can follow in your path.

[Judynyc]

Thanks Mike! :D

It so good to get a male perspective on this.... :agree:

Write a book? maybe call it How to be morbidly obese and invisible at the same time? just kidding!! :p

[mammac-5]

It's true that people may be treating you entirely differently now that you've lost so much weight. Makes one really think about the way one treats/approaches others and the judgements instantly made because of the way people look/dress/talk/etc.

I've lost about 50 lbs over (almost) one year and I'm about 10 lbs from (what I think will be) goal. I've run the gamut of emotions over the past year -- at times I've been angry at the way I get more help from people in stores since I'm more "normal" in size...but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy the attention. I've been sad once or twice in losing the "self" I was so familiar and comfortable with for many years. I've been elated to feel healthy and energetic. I've been bordering-obsessive at times in thinking about, concentrating on, logging, analyzing my food/loss/gain. I've had times where I just don't want to think about it.

I do agree that I get wearing reading posts of those who seem to want to live on LC bars/shakes/snacks/etc. and yet wonder why they don't lose weight. Or those who eat according to plan for 5 days every week and then go crazy with carbs on the weekend and wonder why they can't continue to lose. It gets old. I guess that's one good reason for this area of the site...for those of us who have gotten to the point where we've made our mistakes and are now certain of what we need to do to maintain losses and health.

So, have you figured out what level of carbs you'll need to stay at in order to maintain once you get to goal? I have not yet and I'm curious about the process to figure that out. Also, at this close to goal, how much are you losing per week on average?

[Judynyc]

Thanks for your thoughtful response mammac!!

Being than I'm on south beach, I haven't counted carbs yet!! But what I am doing is slowly reintroducing my body to grains and starch...very little at a time ...to see how I react.

I had recently stalled for 6 weeks and just lost 5 lbs in the past 2 weeks..but I think that happened cuz I was a little ill in my tummy and had very little appetite....I'll happily take the loss no matter ow I got it though.

I'm happy with any loss per week at this point. Even 1/2 lb works for me. I don't care ow long it tkaes to get there as I'm in no hurry now....this is the way I eat now....I will never eat the way I used to eat again!! I can have my favorites now but as a treat once in a while...not everyday!!! At my ripe old age, I'm finally learning!!

[MeBLady]

Hey Judy,

I'm happy to see this thread, as I, too, can relate to some of your feelings.

I haven't lost as much as you, but have lost 69 pounds in a little over six months and goal is right around the corner.

I am estatic about how far I have come, but lately, getting frustrated. I'm not "stalled", but my weight loss has slowed, and because I lost so quickly, I've grown to expect fast results. I have not purchased ANY new clothes, instead, had lots of interim clothing....why buy a new wardrobe when I changed sizes every month???

Now, nothing in my closet fits. Everything, including my bras and underwear are way too big. The few things that actually do fit are so badly outdated that I wouldn't consider wearing them in public. I'm impatient, I just want these last few pounds off so I can buy myself something nice to wear. Buying just one new outfit, to me, is like giving up, and I am NOT happy with my size yet....I want one more size down.

I'm lost when it comes to maintaining, no clue as to what carb level I will stablize yet....and afraid to try until I reach goal.

[Judynyc]

Hi MeBLady! :wave:

Its good to know that I'm not alone!! :D

I have to admit to buying alot of new things as I lost pounds....I had to as my really big sizes were way too big and literally falling off my body :lol: I recently bought some things at Old Navy, like cheap tank tops and crop pants...well made, very well priced (tanks 2 for 15-, crop pants 20-) Gap stuff is good but more expensive but I had fun shopping there and not hiding like I did not belong in the store. ;)

Can't you start with some new undergarments? Those don't change size that much and you do have a such a small amount of weight that you are still going to lose.

Also, thrift shops maybe a way for you to get some inexpensive things that fit you today!! Its a good thing for our self esteem that you wear clothes that fit you well so that you feel like you look good!! :agree:

69 lbs is alot of pounds!! Way to go!! :thup:

[mammac-5]

I agree -- I bought new undies and bras after mine were all baggy/saggy. But I've gotten almost all of my new clothes from thrift shops. It takes some time to hunt for what you need and to check things out to make sure they aren't damaged, but it's been worth it for me. Some of the nicer consignment shops will only take items that are pressed and checked over very well.

[MeBLady]

I didn't have to buy anything up until this point, cause as I got heavier over the years, I couldn't bear to throw my smaller sizes away....so I had at least a couple of pairs of jeans/shorts in each size to get me through.

LOL, I gave up on my 10's and 7's long ago tho, and those are the sizes I need now. I wore a lot of cotton leggings/baggy shirts when I was heavy, and that is what I am basically wearing now -- does very little to show off my new figure.

I went to the mall a couple of weeks ago to try some stuff on, at least to get an idea of what size I am into -- problem is, I took my size 3, 16 year old dd with me, who basically locked me in a dressing room and brought me all the skimpy styles that the teens are wearing, then promptly told me I was still too fat to wear that stuff. I wanted to slap her!

It would probably help for me to go shopping alone and find something appropriate for both my size and age....my husband says I look fantastic and to GO BUY SOMETHING, LOL.

I just can't bring myself to do it. At home, I am proud of the way I look, and everybody that knew me before my weight came off tells me I look great. However, in a store full of strangers surrounded by the skinny minny's that I used to be 10 years ago, I feel like an old flat blob still.

I think another part of it is somewhat of a mid life crisis as well -- the last time I was thin, I was in my 20's happily enjoying mini skirts, half shirts, and very skimpy clothing. LCing gave me my health and stamnia back....I FEEL younger, and want to dress younger.

Right now, I hate my current weight, and always have when I have been this size before. Its an "in between" size for me where I look dumpy in something baggy, but not quite small enough to carry off the tighter stuff. Does this HAVE to be the weight where my loss slows???

LOL, looks like I typed out a heck of a vent here....I think I needed it tho ;-)

[Judynyc]

Good vent!! :lol:

Feel better? I hope so.....I'm older than you by 16 yrs!! I know how you are feeling and I've gotta share with you what I've learned....you've gotta find a way to like yourself where you are right now!!

I learned this when I was a size 22!!! I was working with a therapist who told me to go buy clothes that fit and made me feel good and to not look at the size..... it was hard but I did it and she was right!!

I too was a hotty when I was younger...look in my gallery for pics of me in my 30s. I feel great today and look better now than when I was 40 and close to 300 lbs!! :lol: We are older and much better than way back then...enjoy what you've done for yourself and show yourself off! :agree: :D

[MissScruff]

Hey, have you been reading my mind or what! This is the reason I have been coming across so strongly on the no excuses, no frankenfoods, and stop the cheating! I don't know...maybe it was an avenue to vent my frustration at being so close to goal and terrified? Yes, I am scared...of gaining all that weight back AGAIN! So, I think I am trying to isolate myself? Trying to screw up my own progress with low carb junk foods...and absolutely terrified of getting rid of my old clothes! You just wouldn't believe the bags of clothes piled up! It's unreal! So, I am unofficially stalled, since I haven't lost an ounce in almost a month! I know, that isn't long enough to call it a stall, so maybe a semi-stall? :D I feel terribly lonely and scared and confused...so what is a gal to do? Maybe we should form a club because it seems like there are others that get it! I have decided to go a different route with advice...don't give it unless I am prepared to back it up (if possible). Like a poster was asking about Gatorade and I did a bit of research and posted links and all! Now my son, who is 20, won't drink the stuff anymore. Do you think he wanted to hear what was there? No! So, why on earth do we go through all this to help other folks?? But, at least I gave info that had backup to it...unlike the advice I saw somewhere that said to go ahead and use the item since it doesn't have all that much sugar in it so how can it be damaging? Hello! Induction? Sugar...NOT! I would think folks like us have information of value because of our successes in this journey! Yet, folks that have lost maybe ten pounds or round about are filling this forum with misinformation...not their learned experiences...they still have to earn that, but with the way of eating they are promoting...well it scares me! Something I see alot is the advice to eat frankenfoods, because after all "I" (not me) did and it hasn't hurt my weight one bit...then I look at the stats and that person might have shown a loss of 4 pounds! Seriously! Then someone like me comes along (I have lost 157 pounds) and says DON'T! Then watch me get slammed! Badly! So, ya, I feel really lonely around here! As a whole, my posts are now ignored...why? Is it because I am blunt about some of the eating habits on here? I even got in trouble for saying to one gal to look at the stats of the person posting! Why did I give that advice? Because, like eBays feedback threads, those stats tell a lot about where the person began and how far they have come...it shows that the person is doing something right in their journey and that is the person I want to learn from! Sorry if I am offending anyone with this, but we are being open about our feelings in here, right? There is nothing for me to learn from someone who has lost 4 pounds! Well, maybe a really cool recipe and then of course just the interaction which I think is critical here. I've even had folks tell me they are afraid to post behind me because they don't want to hear what I have to say! I certainly don't claim to be right all the time, but hey, I think I have learned a bit about losing weight! So, where do we all go from here? I know I am afraid to finish this journey because I don't know what to expect when I get there! I do know what it is like to be slim...downright skinny...so why I am afraid to weigh 135 pounds?

Judy, you are so not alone!

[MeBLady]

Good vent!!

Feel better? I hope so.....I'm older than you by 16 yrs!! I know how you are feeling and I've gotta share with you what I've learned....you've gotta find a way to like yourself where you are right now!!

I learned this when I was a size 22!!! I was working with a therapist who told me to go buy clothes that fit and made me feel good and to not look at the size..... it was hard but I did it and she was right!!

I too was a hotty when I was younger...look in my gallery for pics of me in my 30s. I feel great today and look better now than when I was 40 and close to 300 lbs!! We are older and much better than way back then...enjoy what you've done for yourself and show yourself off!

Hee, yeah, I do feel a little better....I think I just needed to finally SAY (in this case, type, LOL) what I did as it has been on my mind for awhile....and I feel guilty for feeling it, as just 6 months ago I was over 200 pounds and can hardly complain for the progress I have made.

I have had to accept a size 12, 14, 16, and eventually an 18 -- I didn't want to, but as the pounds crept on with no hope in sight of stopping it, there wasn't a whole lot of choice.

However, you are right, I DO need to be comfortable with the size I am now. I am close enough to goal that a pair of shorts/tank tops I buy right now will still fit me with another 10 pounds off.

I guess I've been stuck in this weight loss mode, no letting up, complete dedication long enough that I don't know how to stop. I am not done with my weight loss -- my ideal goal is closer to 130/135 depending on my LBM at that point, but I AM close enough that it shouldn't be a big deal anymore.

Hey, have you been reading my mind or what! This is the reason I have been coming across so strongly on the no excuses, no frankenfoods, and stop the cheating! I don't know...maybe it was an avenue to vent my frustration at being so close to goal and terrified? Yes, I am scared...of gaining all that weight back AGAIN! So, I think I am trying to isolate myself? Trying to screw up my own progress with low carb junk foods...and absolutely terrified of getting rid of my old clothes! You just wouldn't believe the bags of clothes piled up! It's unreal! So, I am unofficially stalled, since I haven't lost an ounce in almost a month! I know, that isn't long enough to call it a stall, so maybe a semi-stall? :D I feel terribly lonely and scared and confused...so what is a gal to do? Maybe we should form a club because it seems like there are others that get it!

Scruff, I think you are reading MY mind, LOL! I have piles of my fat clothes stacked a mile high too, even those it isn't physically possible to wear.

I haven't hit the frankenfoods, but I have been scared to lower my portions (which were for a 200 pound person) in fear that I will get stuck eating next to nothing in order to maintain. I lowered them last week (to what they should be for my new weight) as well as kicked in some strenuous exercise in order to jumpstart me, and already scared THAT will force me to exercise in order to maintain.

I also go through spurts in posting advice over in the Newbie forums for the same reasons you do.

I think it would be helpful to see more of these issues that we are obviously dealing with in this pre maintenance/maintenance forum. We've reached a new stage, and I think it would be beneficial to start talking about it.

Yet, folks that have lost maybe ten pounds or round about are filling this forum with misinformation...not their learned experiences...they still have to earn that, but with the way of eating they are promoting...well it scares me! Something I see alot is the advice to eat frankenfoods, because after all "I" (not me) did and it hasn't hurt my weight one bit...then I look at the stats and that person might have shown a loss of 4 pounds! Seriously! Then someone like me comes along (I have lost 157 pounds) and says DON'T! Then watch me get slammed! Badly! So, ya, I feel really lonely around here! As a whole, my posts are now ignored...why? Is it because I am blunt about some of the eating habits on here? I even got in trouble for saying to one gal to look at the stats of the person posting! Why did I give that advice? Because, like eBays feedback threads, those stats tell a lot about where the person began and how far they have come...it shows that the person is doing something right in their journey and that is the person I want to learn from! Sorry if I am offending anyone with this, but we are being open about our feelings in here, right? There is nothing for me to learn from someone who has lost 4 pounds! Well, maybe a really cool recipe and then of course just the interaction which I think is critical here. I've even had folks tell me they are afraid to post behind me because they don't want to hear what I have to say! I certainly don't claim to be right all the time, but hey, I think I have learned a bit about losing weight!

This is one of the main reasons why I haven't really felt I "fit in" around here, most of the support I have gotten is from posting in my own darn journal.

I started my LC journey back in Jan., when apparently there are a rush of newbies with New Year's diet resolutions. Within a month or two, most vanished. The few that stayed around resorted to meat/egg fasts or some other quick fix to break their "weekly stall", passing around diet pill recommendations or the latest LC trend. I can't share support with this! By all means, I WANT to reach my weight goal, but I went into this with health first, weight loss, second.

So, where do we all go from here? I know I am afraid to finish this journey because I don't know what to expect when I get there! I do know what it is like to be slim...downright skinny...so why I am afraid to weigh 135 pounds?

Judy, you are so not alone!

I'm impatient to finish, I want the rest of the weight off NOW.....but I am also afraid of maintenance -- definite fear of the unknown that I want to jump into yet continually put off thinking about it.

I am not afraid of weighing 135 pounds, but I am afraid of what to do with myself once I get there, and afraid of not being able to keep it.

[Judynyc]

Ohhh Scruffy!! :wave:

I'm so glad that you made your way down here to this quiet little corner!! :lol: It was actually you complaining that got me to thinking about how I'm feeling now.

I help and help and help all the newbies but I don't take care of my needs!! And although most of the newbies appreciate my help and support, there are some who have given me a very hard time...like I want to be the food police!! :lol: yeah right!!

We've worked hard to get where we are...You should be very proud of your accomplishment and not feeling such anxiety!! I'm thrilled with myself right now and I've only lost 101 lbs!! :lol: :lol: :lol: only 101!!! did you see that I said that? How many people do you kow that can say that? Not too many, I bet!! Its a very big deal!! I'm very impressed with you and if you told me what to do, I'd listen to you!! :agree:

Theres the Babes thread? Did you see it? I'm no longer a Babe!! cuz I was attacked by one of the newbies who routinely drinks and binges...she doesn't want to be told what to do!! I didn't tell her anything...I wrote a general note to the group and she blew up...so I blew up right back at her and WW III started....this is one of the reasons that I've stayed pretty much to myself for these 15 months that I've been here. I knew this would happen as it always does. My group is much smaller than atkins so its easier to see whos here for the serious work and who just wants a quick fix....I have a soft spot for the TDCers....so I give them a little more of me. I can't get too into those with 20-40 lbs to lose....but if they are trying to lose over 100...I'm totally there for them!! and they are the ones who really appreciate it!!

As far as your stall goes....I was stalled for all of May and into most of June..then I got a little food poisoning and lost my appetite for a couple of weeks and all I could eat was starchy stuff as I was constantly nauseous. I ate oatmeal, couscous, dreamfields, bananas....little bits of protein...I started to lose....go back into my journal and see what I've been eating for the past few weeks....I log my food daily!! I took an antibiotic for a few days and it knocked whatever i had out....So I ate no grain or starch for a few days and the weight just wooooshed off!! I think I've finally figured out carb cycling!! :lol:

MeBLady?? when are you going clothes shopping? and do leave DD at home!! I've started to eat as if I'm in maintenance a bit so that when I get there , I wont be scared to gain it back!! I've been increasing my grains each day and then backing off...its helping me to knock off more pounds!!

I don't think that many do actually get to maintenance....I know that this is the first time in my life that I've gotten this far with any diet/food plan....but I also know that I've changed the way I eat and that I'll never eat starchy carbs the way I used to eat them. :idea:

I know that we are on different plans but the end results are similar in that eating a wide variety of foods in mdoerate amounts is where we should all be headed...right?

[MissScruff]

Gosh, I got so upset earlier that I logged off and said I would never come back...then I asked myself why I was so angry...was it at a certain post? Or does it come back to my frustration at not being able to complete my journey and the loneliness I am feeling? So, on my way to bed I decided to stop by here and log back on to see if anyone had responded to my post and I just cried. Why oh why am I so sad lately when I should be jumping up and down with joy being so close to my goal? Gosh, I even looked at pictures and was just horrified at some of them! So, of course, the crying got worse! So folks...what do we do now? We are on different eating plans, but are we? I don't know anything about SB, but have heard that maintenance is similar? Of course, without research I won't really know for sure. I do know that I am eating too many carbs...allowable carbs, but too many! I also know that I stopped losing weight about a week after I quit my job...no where as active now as I was there! I miss the activity level of the job and I miss my own paycheck! Anyhow, where do we go from here? I took a fast look at the maintenance area and it is really dead! So, how do we get it going? I tried to get an OWL thing going, but it died fast...and I should be in pre-maintenance anyhow! So, how do we get this going and how do we find out who is actually at this stage...a poll? Cuz, I really don't think I can take much more of the posts about eating junk! How do we share where we are and learn from each other? How do I survive outside of the safety of my journal without getting someone mad at me? Why am I worried about someone being mad at me? I think it goes back to the emotions playing out at this point of my journey. I did look at the Atkins Chick thread, but didn't really feel an association there and I am Atkins, not South Beach so the beach thread is out, yet in that one folks seem to be so dedicated, makes one considering going to the beach instead...hey Judy, a perfect opportunity to convert someone! :D Well, I feel completely drained by the whole experience and just don't know where to take it from here. Anyhow, thanks ladies for listening to me...that means a lot and I am so relating to a lot of what you all are saying.

[Brennabug]

Scuffygal,

i havent earned my right yet, but i have to tell you. III took your adivse to heart, YOU have inspired me. I cannot tell you how grateful i am that you DO post those nono's I think you are brave to put up with the harrassment. I dont kno wthat i would be able to do it. But just know this, YOU are the one that helped meover the semi low carb edge.. no sugar means no sugar, and the decision i made for myself and my health was based on YOUR success
anyway
take care
Brenna :bhug:

[KryssiMc]

Hi Judy...I just wanted to congratulate you...you look spectacular. As far as the whole SBD skirmish goes... I know about it only because you gave me some advice on SB for my mom and I pop in there from time to time to glean advice from you all. Again...thanks for that.

I have to tell you, I learned myself recently, from that old thread in the TDC, what you are trying to say. We don't always hear what we need to hear, do we? Being from NYC myself, I tend to be a little bit more "in your face" than a lot of people as well. But, I did learn to stop being so darned defensive and that's a good thing.

You need to take a step back, breathe, and go back to doing what you have been doing all along...being an endless source of inspiration for others on this forum. I am not on the same plan as you, but have taken much of your advice to heart anyway because it just makes sense.

That being said, I am glad we finally have something in common...maintenance. It's the hardest part of the journey, I think. So many more choices and that stupid voice in my head that says "ok, you've made it....one little _____ won't hurt".

You need to bring your wisdom here to the maintenance group because it's sadly quiet here and I believe that most of us still need support.

[MeBLady]

Ohhh Scruffy!! :wave:
MeBLady?? when are you going clothes shopping? and do leave DD at home!! I've started to eat as if I'm in maintenance a bit so that when I get there , I wont be scared to gain it back!! I've been increasing my grains each day and then backing off...its helping me to knock off more pounds!!

I have decided to go this weekend (after payday) and get myself a nice pair of jean shorts and a couple of tanks, that actually FIT, and yeah, I'm going alone :-). We have a brand new Victoria's Secret in our mall, perfect place for me to get a comfortable bra, LOL! In the meantime, I am going to clean out my drawers and closet and rid them of everything that is outdated and too big. Hee, hubby is estatic about that one!

I have wondered if I need to increase my carbs, as by reading around here, most seem to have good results when they move up the carb ladder.

I started out in the beginning at PP's recommended 30/35, then backed off out of lack of hunger and laziness. Some weeks, my carb level has been as low as 15. After stalling for most of the month of June (lost weight, not inches), last week I counted all carbs at 20 per day, decreased my protein, and got back on the treadmill....saw a good swoosh in inches (increased my LBM!). I want to keep it the same way for this week, and try 25 carbs for next week.

I am wary of carb cycling, BUT, I have learned that changing things up is good for a jumpstart, so I understand the mindset behind it, and I do think I need to change things up a bit, and keep track rather than just yo yoing all over.

I don't think that many do actually get to maintenance....I know that this is the first time in my life that I've gotten this far with any diet/food plan....but I also know that I've changed the way I eat and that I'll never eat starchy carbs the way I used to eat them. :idea:

It does seem that many end up quitting/leaving before getting to the maintenance stage, tho I have seen quite a few still posting that have been maintaining a year or more. Perhaps at that point, those move on and don't feel the need for a support forum, having long sensed established this as a WOL and it is all second nature now.

This is the first time I have come this far with a diet also....actually, it is the first actual diet I have ever done! I've taken off weight with my pregnancies with no problem, mostly with starvation tactics and strenuous areobics. The most I have ever lost, ever needed to lose, was 45 pounds in three months after having my dd 16 years ago. I did it with areobics and Slim Fast.

When I hit 30, starvation, slim fast, and even exercise gave me 0 results, and I started feeling bad physically which made me scared of abusing my body by taking off weight in an unhealthy way.

LC gave me a healthy way -- I don't have a problem with this WOE at all, and I think I can do it permanently. Now and then in the future, I wouldn't mind a rolled taco in moderation, LOL, but for the most part, I could eat exactly the way I am now forever. The exercise is another story, I tend to burn out after a few months.

I know that we are on different plans but the end results are similar in that eating a wide variety of foods in mdoerate amounts is where we should all be headed...right?

Sort of. Protein Power recommends keeping all sugar, starch and grains out forever in the "purist" approach, but does allow within the lenient side of the plan to add them back in, in moderation, IF your body can handle it. I am supposed to go up the carb ladder until I stop losing, and at maintenance, yeah, I CAN add "forbidden foods" if I control my portions within my stablized carb level.

Problem is, I don't know how much carbage my body can handle yet. I have learned that I feel better with higher fat, and I strongly suspect it is the free radicals from my smoking. The more carbs I have, the less fat I can have or calories come into play.

[MeBLady]

Gosh, I got so upset earlier that I logged off and said I would never come back...then I asked myself why I was so angry...was it at a certain post? Or does it come back to my frustration at not being able to complete my journey and the loneliness I am feeling? So, on my way to bed I decided to stop by here and log back on to see if anyone had responded to my post and I just cried. Why oh why am I so sad lately when I should be jumping up and down with joy being so close to my goal? Gosh, I even looked at pictures and was just horrified at some of them! So, of course, the crying got worse!

I have been irritable and depressed lately also, you are certainly NOT alone! However, doesn't it help to know it isn't just you, and this isn't that abnormal? Keep talking, keep venting! It is nice to connect with a couple of other people about the issues "I" am going through rather than giving advice to others on past experiences. I think I need to look more at the present and the future ;-)

So folks...what do we do now? We are on different eating plans, but are we? I don't know anything about SB, but have heard that maintenance is similar? Of course, without research I won't really know for sure.

I know PP the best, cause that is the plan I am on, but I did do some research on other plans in order to make my choice. There are similiarities and differences in each one, but certainly, IMO, not enough to affect our support of one another. Not everybody does their plan exactly as written either, and I've found that people on different plans tend to overlap each other. For the most part, I think most do meet in the middle at maintenance.

I do know that I am eating too many carbs...allowable carbs, but too many! I also know that I stopped losing weight about a week after I quit my job...no where as active now as I was there! I miss the activity level of the job and I miss my own paycheck! Anyhow, where do we go from here?

I think lack of exercise hurt me too. My son's car broke down at the end of May, and between driving him to school, his two jobs, plus my dd's job and heavy activities, I was literally in my car all day long (in 120 degree heat) and had no time or energy for exercise.

Scruff, based on what you have said, I think you need to meet your fear of reaching goal head on, and move past it. You have the knowledge already as to what you are doing wrong. Crack down! Stop the frankenfoods, start tracking your carbs again and see how many you are actually eating so you know where you are and go from there. Perhaps add in a little exercise, if you haven't been doing any at all, it doesn't take much.

I took a fast look at the maintenance area and it is really dead! So, how do we get it going? I tried to get an OWL thing going, but it died fast...and I should be in pre-maintenance anyhow! So, how do we get this going and how do we find out who is actually at this stage...a poll? Cuz, I really don't think I can take much more of the posts about eating junk!

I think a poll is a good idea, and would see how many are actually looking in here that are premaintenance/new to maintenance. I think it would be beneficial to see more "new to maintenance" threads where those settled in maintaining can give their input as to what we are going through. Perhaps starting some "getting to know you" type threads as well.

Basically, give this area of the forum a little jumpstart....post, post, post!

How do we share where we are and learn from each other? How do I survive outside of the safety of my journal without getting someone mad at me? Why am I worried about someone being mad at me? I think it goes back to the emotions playing out at this point of my journey.

Well, I think Judy creating this thread was a good start :-) Though I am irritated by the same things, I can't say that I have gotten anybody mad at me through what I have posted that I know of...at least I haven't gotten any angry PMs over it, LOL! More so, I've seen others, like yourself, that have jumped in to back me up.

All in all tho, if someone gets mad, that is really their problem, y/k? If you feel the need to give advice (I do, sometimes, for various reasons), all you can do is try and be careful about the way you present yourself, and THEN you have nothing to feel guilty over. I've read many of your posts, the majority of which I agree with, and I don't think you come across defensive at all. For every person you may tee off, there could be many more, lurkers you don't know about, that read what you say, actually check your stats to see you DO have the experience, and someone else just starting will be helped to accomplish what you have.

I did look at the Atkins Chick thread, but didn't really feel an association there and I am Atkins, not South Beach so the beach thread is out, yet in that one folks seem to be so dedicated, makes one considering going to the beach instead...hey Judy, a perfect opportunity to convert someone! :D Well, I feel completely drained by the whole experience and just don't know where to take it from here. Anyhow, thanks ladies for listening to me...that means a lot and I am so relating to a lot of what you all are saying.

The PP forum is pretty dead in the main area, they all hang out in a sticky thread kind of like a chat room -- very friendly group, and I post now and then, but most of them have known each other for so long making a little harder to follow.

I would also prefer a dedicated group ... I know where you are coming from.