The Atkins Diet is Killing Me!

[sexee_babe]

The Atkins Diet is Killing Me!

http://www.babyfathead.com/pieces/atkins_diet.htm

It'll be the bloody death of me. I've been on it for 4 months and I've lost two and a half stone. Which is great, but I'm going to be dead before I get a chance to enjoy it.

Oh, it's not going to be kidney failure from trying to process too many proteins.

It's not going to be a heart attack because I'm lining my arteries with cholesterol.

It's not going to be one of my friends hacking me to pieces, driven to insanity by my vile breath.

No, I'm going to have a bloody aneurysm if I read another half arsed article about why it's bad for you written by another cheap hack who hasn't actually read the book jumping on the coat-tails of another scaremongering article by another tabloid journo who cant resist putting the boot in to anything good that happens in this God forsaken country!

Atkins' diet is so dangerous, the man himself died of a heart attack. - No he didn't, he slipped on some ice fixing an aerial on his roof and fell to his death, aged 73 (Are you sure you're not confusing him with Rod Hull? - S (http://www.babyfathead.com/writers/simon.htm)).

OK, well maybe that's true, but he did have a heart attack and was lucky to survive. - Yes, he did. He was bloody 69 years old and in the middle of a grueling promotion tour for his new book, are you bloody surprised he had a heart attack!??

What about that girl in the States that died from doing the Atkins diet? - You mean that girl that had been suffering from various serious eating disorders all of her teenage life, was already under medical/psychological supervision and happened to have just started the Atkins diet when her body finally gave up after years of systematic abuse?

Well, nobody knows how prolonged exposure to a new diet will affect you in the long run. - Oh, this NEW diet that was first published in the 60's? The diet that's been followed by a few thousand people for the last FORTY years? That NEW diet?

Get a bloody grip people! "It must be true, I read it in the Sun"???? "There must be something wrong with it, it was in that newspaper known for its journalistic integrity, its total lack of agenda and its careful avoidance of prurient alarmism, The Daily Mail"!!! It'll all be an Al Qaeda plot next!

Get that casket ready.





Fatbstard

[hkblue]

Give me a freakin break! Another idiot who has no clue what Atkins is all about! SHEESH!

Look at the guy anyway...if he isn't a coronary waiting to happen, I don't know who is. I wish all these anti low carbers would get a life!

[tamarian]

Give me a freakin break! Another idiot who has no clue what Atkins is all about! SHEESH!

Look at the guy anyway...if he isn't a coronary waiting to happen, I don't know who is. I wish all these anti low carbers would get a life!
Actually, I think he's being sarcastic, and he's pro-LC.

Wa'il

[Lisa N]

I was :lol: :lol: :lol: most of the way through that article. He said a lot of things I've been thinking for a while.
I do wonder where he got the information regarding the teen girl who suffered a sudden collapse and died having a history of eating disorders, though?

[tamarian]

I was :lol: :lol: :lol: most of the way through that article. He said a lot of things I've been thinking for a while.
I do wonder where he got the information regarding the teen girl who suffered a sudden collapse and died having a history of eating disorders, though? I recall reading something about it in the news, but don't quote me, that was from a couple of years ago.

Wa'il

[doreen T]

LOL!! I checked the link ... gotta love the before and after pics. :lol:


Doreen

[slpmom]

Thankyou for a great laugh! My eyes were tearing. I also love the before and after pictures. :lol:

[Karen]

Loved the before and after pics and the baby fat head! :lol:

Karen

[Sinbad]

Update on the site!

Stop press - go here: http://forum.lowcarber.org/showthread.php?t=150767 Seems like the 'low-carbers' have picked up on this piece big style. Most seem to realise it's a nice bit of satire, apart from 'HKBLUE' who appears to think that it's a serious piece of news journalism and the photos above are real photos of our man Fatbstard. Makes me wonder where some people were hiding when brains were given out.

[Faust]

Weird. He's now linking backto this thread:


Stop press - go here: http://forum.lowcarber.org/showthread.php?t=150767 Seems like the 'low-carbers' have picked up on this piece big style. Most seem to realise it's a nice bit of satire, apart from 'HKBLUE' who appears to think that it's a serious piece of news journalism and the photos above are real photos of our man Fatbstard. Makes me wonder where some people were hiding when brains were given out.


Too bad there wasn't a "wave" emoticon, because I'd use it to say hi to Mr. Fat Bastard.

Awfully funny article. Thanks for posting it, sexee_babe.

Patrick

[sexee_babe]

:lol: I should change my name to "Surf Lots"...I love looking up funny articles, I just went into my search browser and typed in "Atkins Heart Disease" and this is what came up. I had to post it, I was laughing too hard not too.:lol:

[sexee_babe]

Wow, he really is linking back, I bet he is someone in this forum....how else would he know I was there and did a copy paste...he probably is a senior LCer...hmmmm....come clean FatBstrd....we wanna meet ya!!!!

[Kristine]

:lol: LMAO! Nice piece. Too true.

[doreen T]

Wow, he really is linking back, I bet he is someone in this forum....how else would he know I was there and did a copy paste...he probably is a senior LCer...hmmmm....come clean FatBstrd....we wanna meet ya!!!!
Um, most webmasters can easily track where links are coming from. I have no doubt there've been a bazillion clicks on the link posted above.

;)


Doreen

[babyfath'd]

You guys! Look what you made me do, sign up to this site just so I could send you a reply.

REALLY glad you like the piece we ran on the Atkins diet, and that most of you saw it for the satire it obviously is, although 'Fatbstard' (not his real name!) is actually on the Atkins regime.

Baby Fat Head is a site devoted to bringing new writers in the fields of comedy and social commentary to a wider forum, we've been running since mid-April and have quite a following. We're based in the UK but have writers from many areas (including the US) submitting work on a regular basis. Our homepage is http://www.babyfathead.com but be warned that some of the humour is of an adult nature, also be aware that most of the time we do have our tongue in our cheek, and see most things as fair game to poke fun at (barring things like race issues and paedophilia, which are pretty much no go areas).

Another site you might like to consider visiting is http://www.poundy.com/index.html

All the best from all at Baby Fat Head, and thanks for discovering us.

Simon - joint owner, editor, designer and writer - Baby Fat Head

[sexee_babe]

Ok we heard from them....I am tickled.

[doreen T]

.. I just went into my search browser and typed in "Atkins Heart Disease" and this is what came up. I had to post it, I was laughing too hard not too.
This article is hilarious, and I hadn't seen it before. :thup:

However, just a note .. if you're sincerely interested in the science of lowcarbing, heart disease and cholesterol, and want to search for current, up-to-date information (and old articles too ;)), you might want to use our search tool to scour this Research forum. It's very thorough and most published studies for and against lowcarbing from the last few years will be found here.

:idea:


Doreen

[sexee_babe]

Thank you Doreen. I will do that..I fell off the wagon after I heard about my neighbor having a mild heart attack....but I am back on today, full force with a smile.

[doreen T]

..... Baby Fat Head is a site devoted to bringing new writers in the fields of comedy and social commentary to a wider forum, we've been running since mid-April and have quite a following. We're based in the UK but have writers from many areas (including the US) submitting work on a regular basis. ..
hi Simon,

Welcome :wave: Yeah, I clicked around and read a few other articles there, some good stuff. And what a coincidence .. there's a few contributors from the US here also, although we originate in Canada. :D :lol: We have a thriving UK forum here too .. http://forum.lowcarber.org/forumdisplay.php?f=35 .. I understand Atkins is getting a lot of media flak across the pond :daze:


Doreen

[babyfath'd]

Hello! What a warm welcome.

I'm afraid I don't know too much about this Atkins Diet lark. I myself have in the past few weeks attempted to eat a little more healthily. It's no great structured diet, and I'm not sticking to one type of food and doing away with another etc, just cutting out some of the rubbish and actually THINKING about what and when I eat. This was under the watchful eye of TS Carr, another of our writers.

I do however have a friend who has been 'Atkinsing' for about 6 months and does look much healthier for it. If he cut out the pints of beer he might look even better!!

I think I have come to realise that monosodium glutamate, although making you look like a porkbeast, does actually keep bad breath away! :lol: ;)

[gotbeer]

Hey there Simon - welcome.

Atkins has to be the most hilarious diet out there - and the funniest part is that it actually works, makes you feel great, and seems to improve your health through every measurement of physical indicators.

And it is raucous good fun watching Atkins detractors quirm as one study after another validates the benefits of the diet.

Furthermore, what could be more slapstick than being pelted with pork rinds?

Better duck - throwing one atchya,

Frank

[jedswife]

welcome babyfath'd!

we welcome intelligent beings here.

[shortstuff]

That has to be one of the funniest articles I've read about this WOL. I love the tongue in cheek approach at chastising the idiots out there who constantly have to naysay anything good in life.

Welcome babyfath'd and thanks for the laugh. Laughing is good for the soul and I just had my dose for the day.

shortstuff

[babyfath'd]

Hey low-carber chums, how is everyone doing? Sticking to those diets?

Hope you're all OK

Simon